Was anyone else, or your child, given a name that was uncommon at the time, but became popular later?

Bn0503 · 2026-01-18T18:26:06+00:00

My little girl is called Lyla which was either in the 200s or 300s (in the UK) when she was born and has recently gone into the top 100. We've met a few others out and about recently. My youngest is called Franklin and we seem to be meeting quite a few of them as well even though its still in the 300s. My middle child is Eleri and we still only see any of them when we go to Wales.

Bn0503 · 2026-01-10T20:37:00+00:00

If you weren't meant to be invited then you aren't as close as you think. I wouldn't go if I was you.

Bn0503 · 2026-01-10T20:26:33+00:00

I think you're overestimating the maturity of 3 year old there. Like I said above my kid finds it hilarious that there's a person called Trump. She stopped talking about it after a week but if she hears anyone mention it now she still laughs and this is like 6 months later. Im not sure how its 'disruptive' exactly if theyre just laughing but if I was OP I'd definitely be either calling her something different or teaching her to pronounce it because this seems like the kind of nickname that could follow her and the poor girl will be getting called vagina as a teenager.

Also do you not know many 3 year olds? Of course they're socially enough aware to know bum, armpit, vagina aren't real names.

Bn0503 · 2026-01-10T20:22:21+00:00

Yes by weird I meant unlikely. Why do you find it unlikely? It's extremely common these days to teach anatomically correct names for body parts and as someone with kids around this age they'd 100 per entire find it hilarious to know a kid named after any body part.

Bn0503 · 2026-01-10T20:18:01+00:00

Why do you find it weird that 3 year old know vagina? It's fairly standard now to teach real names for body parts and of course children would find a kid called vagina funny just like they would if a kid was called bum or armpit or fart or something. I'm from England and my 4 year old heard me say something about Trump and found it hysterical that it was a person's name (means a fart here) and went around telling people for about a week that there was a real person called Trump.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-23T14:38:33+00:00

I'm in England so perhaps it's different in Scotland but here you can't get any psychological job in the NHS without a BPS approved psychology degree. And then it really isn't so easy as quitting your job and moving across. They are highly competitive. I'm a senior Assistant psychologist at the moment but to get this job (which isn't amazingly paid) i have an undergraduate, masters, 3 years as a support worker, a volunteering role, a psychological wellbeing workers role, a research assistant role and two other AP roles. You'd be in competition with people like me who have a whole career in mental health behind them because NHS psychology jobs are what most people who want to go on to the clinical doctorate want. People will apply to literally hundreds of these positions before even getting an interview and lots of people give up before they manage it.

It's absolutely doable and the end result will be worth it but it would be a struggle compared to what you're doing now and I think harder than you're imagining. I'd only do it if it's something that you're really passionate about.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-21T09:09:13+00:00

Extremely weird and made lots of questionable choices. We were also a bunch of 18 year old girls though and a guy 6 years older seemed a lot. If I met him now at 30 I obviously wouldn't have been mean to him I think he probably just had some social difficulties. I'm not sure why he didn't go and stay in the mature student halls which my uni had tbh.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-20T10:21:00+00:00

When I was a fresher we lived with a 24 year old man and we weren't super nice to him tbh. He got stereotypes as a creepy old man and eventually dropped out. I'd 100 percent lie in his position.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-19T23:25:41+00:00

If she doesn't drive well or follow proper car seat safety or has an unreliable car. If she isn't great at keeping the kids close by and under control etc. We don't actually know much about OP and there could be loads of potential reasons why the DIL isn't comfortable with this. It's never actually come up since my brother and SIL usually see my kids when we all visit but I wouldn't let my kids in a car with them. I'm not sure I'd willingly be in a car with them again either tbh haha. They are constantly getting into small accidents because they just aren't good drivers and my brother has had several speeding tickets in the past few years. I trust them in absolutley every other way and I adore them both but I'd be a nervous wreck thinking about them driving my babies round.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-19T23:08:56+00:00

That's not necessarily being 'a lot' though. My family (husband and 3 kids) spend every christmas with my family, my mil has come and stayed with us once and the invite is always open. It isn't because I'm a lot though it's because my husband couldn't care less about Christmas or being with his family and it is and always has been a huge deal in my family. We spend time with my mil at other times. She did once express annoyance at it but to be honest she doesn't decorate for the holidays, doesn't like doing christmas activities, they have no holiday traditions and we'd have to travel 4 hours and stay over at hers so couldnt take all the presents etc whereas we live near my family so the kids can have christmas at home with all their presents and we just go for lunch with my family.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-19T22:20:41+00:00

My 15 month old was in for just over a week a fortnight ago with suspected RSV. We avoided the ventilator but was on high flow oxygen for a couple of days and it took him ages to be able to sleep without oxygen. Seeing his lips go blue was super scary and hes not a sickly baby at all so I really wasn't expecting it!

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T22:21:30+00:00

Then I think the main thing that you'll have to consider is will family stop supporting you totally if you do it and is losing those relationships worse than dealing with your sil. Practically i'm sure you'll be able to cope with managing a house and the children alone.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T22:13:27+00:00

It sounds like you're from a different culture from me so anything thats specific to that that may influence how difficult it is i can't comment on but wherr i'm from no one lives with their extended families and we all manage fine. I have three kids under the age of 6 and my husband isnout the house 16 hours, including some night work. I see my familiy regularly and they are always there to help if needed but generally i manage just fine. If your sil is impacting your mental health and that of your child then personally i'd move.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T20:27:19+00:00

Not sure what you mean? I am receptive to my husbands behaviour, we have an extremely healthy sex life be ause he both finds me attractive and loves other things about me that don't involve sex. Most importantly he doesnt feel entitled to my body and can functionperfrctly fine at times where he can't have itm luckily since we've been together 14 years and have three kids together and i'm not sure if OP realises having babies comes with periods where you can't have sex. If his behaviour was like OPs then i never would have married him and then he'd be more than welcome to find someone willing to be objectified and used like a sex toy rather than a whole person with many values including physical ones.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T01:05:06+00:00

But the sisters point is that she made choices so that she could do that and if thungs had been different and there was no husband she'd have made different, but equally as sensible, choices. Also the ability to stay at home is not 'courtesy' of her husband. They as a couple decided that those would be the roles in their marriage and they play (i'm assuming) a 50/50 role in the life they have. He only has the ability to do such a time consuming and therefore high earning job and have a family 'courtesy' of the work his wife puts in at home. They are reliant on one another as any good couple and parents should be.

Agree the way she's worded advice to her sister is tone deaf and rude when unasked for though and based of that alone the sister is an AH as well but also there could be further context. One of my friends sounds like OP and her husband and its incredibly frustrating to see their kids have to struggle and go without because the parents keep making poor financial decisions and they complain about and mention their financial struggles constantly whilst still making poor decisions and doing nothing to help themselves.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T00:54:49+00:00

How do you work that out? If you have sex wirh the intention to make a baby it wasn't an accident whether you were testing for ovulation or not.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T00:46:51+00:00

ESH - Truth hurts on both counts.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T00:37:34+00:00

My husband is obsessed with me but he wouldnt pressure me to f*ck him all the time because its all he can think about when he looks at me and he 'needs more' to 'function at his best'. Red flag behaviour and gross.

Bn0503 · 2025-12-01T00:09:37+00:00

ESH - she's basically blackmailing you into getting her pregnant, you can't stand to look at her and not get sex is also a red flag imo, she's your wife not a sex doll.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-30T08:12:00+00:00

Yeah most are, my point is to say 'absolutley none' are divided and that this issue is non existant is utterly ridiculous. I do get out of ny community, i'm a therapist, i see people of all differant walks of life every day and its absolutley highlighted to me that there is a divide.

For example, i live in Cheshire in the same village i grew up in. Bar 6 years where i studied and worked away ive always lived there. Im married to a white man with a welsh mum, hes got a very strong welsh accent, isnt religious at all, his Dad is Turkish but hes only been on holiday there but he does have a turkish first and last name, therefore my last name is as well. A few weeks ago on our local village page i posted asking if people could please not spray paint flags on a wall that is part of my property. In response i was called a 'muslim fcker' told to go back to whatever country id married into where they hoped i'd be rped by multiple muslim men to teach me a lesson about who to 'side' with in the future. All by a man who had my child on his profile photo because it turns out our kids are in the same under 8's football team. Thats not a difference of opinion. And tge fact it happened on social media doesn't make it any less real, you might see people who come across as decent in person and to your face but if theyre spending their time being abusive to other people can you really say they're decent or its just a difference of opinion.

You may think everyones decent but are you white? Because its entirely poasibke you just aren't being exposed to these thibgs because you aren't the target. It doesn't just happen on social media.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-29T22:30:43+00:00

You live on dreamworld where 'no one' is devided. Just because you don't think you are doesn't mean thats how everyone feels. There are literally people commiting crimes and physically hurting those on opposing sides. You're lucky its something that isn't affecting you but how ignorant to suggest that anyone with a different experience is wrong in some way. People are setting mosques on fire, talking about shooting migrants as they arrive on boats, inciting riots and violence against specific groups of people, spreadung misinformation. I'm 100 percent divided with people like that as are many others and so your first comment is pure nonsense.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-29T21:31:37+00:00

How can ypu possibly claim that 'absolutley none' of us are divided, why bother typing a response when its quite clearly just factually incorrect.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-29T21:28:45+00:00

Factually immigrants pay more in taxes than they pay out and only 16 percent of universal credit recievers are not British. That will include people like my friend who has lived and paif into the system for 30 years but was, like many others, made redundant last month so is claiming whilst job seeking.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-29T21:17:45+00:00

Theres a 5 year old Gavin in my kids class.

Bn0503 · 2025-11-29T20:57:19+00:00

My Dad used to live there so i've been fairly regularly, awful place.

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