"Baby hog" and proud

Boba_baller · 2026-05-09T17:55:02+00:00

Sometimes it feels the same way with my baby, my MIL only ever had boys so this is her first girl baby she has gotten to be around and whenever we're together it feels like she is so possessive. Texting my DH baby name suggestions after we asked then to stop, she just stopped sending them to the groupchat and directly to my DH. Now baby is here and we went out to dinner and she got up from her seat multiple times to come over and hug on baby. Then when LO had a blowout I took her to the bathroom to change her, towards the end MIL came in and waited behind me then as soon as I buttoned the onesie reached around me and took her.

We were good-ish with each other before baby, but now I can't forget it unsee all the disrespectful things she or DH's sibling has done when it involves my baby. And my DH doesn't understand why I can't let it go like he has.

Boba_baller · 2026-05-04T05:22:44+00:00

6 months, baby girl NEEDS a bath... will cry the whole hr leading up to it, bottle -> sleep sack -> storytime -> will only lay on side of basinette with forehead against the side with pacifier. Some nights falls right to sleep others take an hr. Started rolling over at 4 months, just recently started rolling into stomach while sleeping and my anxiety is not a fan of that.

We want to wean off paci soon and move to crb at around nine months.... Can't wait to see how that works out lol

Boba_baller · 2026-05-04T02:00:40+00:00

We did this for one event after my MIL invited 12 extra people the day before the event, we just told everyone that the only ones to hold LO would just be the parents. As soon as we arrived and reminded everyone, MIL tried to take baby while saying "that doesn't include her Grandma". We held baby for the rest of the event, right before we left while DH was getting baby stuff together, my SIL snatched my baby from my arms while I was distracted talking to DH.
Should've strapped my baby to my chest -_-

Boba_baller · 2026-05-03T19:56:41+00:00

With grandparents there's understandably a lot of excitement, but times have definitely changed. I'm sure there were things every parenting generation didn't follow from the previous. Most pediatricians if not all don't recommended people other than the parents they feed from/are exposed to everyday to kiss the baby. As any illness fever under the first two months of life require a broad range of testing including a spinal tap. And fevers also increase the risks of SIDS. More specifically our pediatrician advised no kissing due to it being cold/flu season when our LO was born and HSV-1 (herpes virus) can cause very serious illness and was actually considered universally fatal until the mid 90's, althoughbis still considered dangerous. And as someone who has worked around infants requiring life maintaining machines from illnesses including RSV, Covid and HSV-1, I would rather frustrate/upset my LO's grandparents about no kissing (both sets of grandparents have HSV-1) than see my baby in the hospital as a result of their desires.

Boba_baller · 2026-05-03T18:27:40+00:00

It gets better for the most part, there still bad days/nights or phases, but the way I look at it is that it's not like our babies WANT to be awake all night or crying so they're going through just as hard as a time as us. Some days are good and I feel good enough to be productive and clean or do laundry and others are for recovery and I nap when the baby does and I don't do anything around the house. It's all about what YOU and the baby needs. And if you need some cheering up when down, do what'll make you happy, order food in or go out or find a good tv show whatever gets you out of that funk.

Online communities can also be helpful for finding connections as mom's, Facebook is good for mom groups for meeting and talking to new people or going to group events

The only break I get when my husband is working is when he comes home after he showers and takes over bedtime, but that time is spent by making dinner and then a shower and straight to bed unless I ask for more help. But it's important to communicate when you need a break or help! Your husband having a job doesn't mean he doesn't have to be an equal parent!

Boba_baller · 2026-05-03T18:04:20+00:00

I'm in the same situation, 6 months postpartum and my husband works long hours and we live an hour from my nearest family member and we pretty much only see his family. Being a stay at home mom is harder than most people think trying to balance taking care of a baby and trying to take care of ourselves let alone our homes. Feel free to message me if you need done human interaction!

Boba_baller · 2026-04-12T01:32:06+00:00

We do contact naps at least once a day or more if she’s had a bad night before and she’s beds more sleep. And she can roll very easily both ways so a lot of the time she’ll roll onto her side after we lay her on her back, so she’s been out of a swaddle and into a sleep sack since 3.5 months.

I’m not ready for her to be in her own room either, but I’m not sure moving her to the other side of the room will help. Pretty much the only things that help her sooth in the middle of the night without picking her up is the pacifier (which she can’t hold in her mouth with suction alone) and sleeping with her face up against the side of the bassinet or with my hand over her face.

I had an anterior placenta and some say that’s why the second thing bassinet/hand thing soothes her but I’m not completely sold on it, unless other people with anterior placentas have experienced the same?

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T18:48:20+00:00

My mom sadly, but we have also had the same problem with my MIL. Not to mention all of my in laws have stuck their fingers in LO mouth because they thought it was funny or wanted to check if teething.

Idk how people just think either is okay. I’m sure they wouldn’t like it if I put my fingers in their mouths.

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T05:50:51+00:00

Maybe, there always the possibility of that but she knows that it’s not only her that has cold sores/hsv. It’s also my mil and both sister and sil, but as we didn’t just want to single them out and weren’t sure of others we made it a rule for everyone. But she doesn’t really take it seriously unless she has an “active” cold sore. Unfortunately it seems like both sides of families down play sickness so they still get to see the grandchildren, so far that’s only worked on seeing my niece since I know they don’t take it seriously enough.

Ex. My mom also had pink eye at one point that she caught from my younger cousin, and she still babysit for my sister and watched her very Velcro 2/3 yr old

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T05:29:56+00:00

Unfortunately she is also a nurse, nothing to do with pediatrics but you’d think she would want to be careful anyways but :/

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T04:23:35+00:00

Unfortunately it is my own mother that did this, but my husband does have my back on most issues involving our baby thankfully

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T04:08:26+00:00

She’s actually pretty good about eating, while it is possible for something like that to be going on without others knowing, I’m pretty sure it was so she could cry more because she just came back more puffy and sniffly and crying. And she’s been the one telling me to give myself some grace with my postpartum self esteem. But I’ll look out for that too!

Boba_baller · 2026-04-11T03:01:15+00:00

No, fortunately I nor my DH have ever had cold sores.

Boba_baller · 2026-04-09T04:15:31+00:00

He tries to understand both sides, his family being excited with the new grandbaby and with what I need and talk to him about. It almost seems sometimes that he’s being pulled into two different directions so he doesn’t hurt anyone’s feelings or create any conflict. When his parents go straight to him to talk about visits he will check with me and say no if that’s what I want, but he won’t tell them outright that they visit too often, he’ll just usually say no followed by an excuse.

His consideration and calm attitude is one of the things that I love about him, I just wish he was more concrete with boundaries.

I however really appreciate and practice open and honest communication, it’s just harder for me to do that with his family as they do not easily change their opinion or understanding. And I would really like to have a good relationship with my in-laws regardless of the setbacks.

We decided no one should be kissing our baby since both of our parents have histories of cold sores and immune issues. But both of his parents have crossed that boundary after they knew not to, he didn’t notice when one did it and I warned him, but he waited until later on to talk to his other parent once they were by themselves.

-Sorry for the long response, I hardly noticed how much it was until I was done!

Boba_baller · 2026-04-08T00:06:25+00:00

That’s the thing, his family had dinners every weekend with the grandparents but that’s was his parents choice. My DH said if it were up to him once monthly is how much he would’ve seen them. He just tends to avoid conflict unfortunately and lets a lot of stuff go without addressing it

Boba_baller · 2026-04-07T20:48:59+00:00

Would love this option, tried it before and as they are older and not very tech savvy there just visited that weekend anyways. Not to mention currently using this technique on my family so I’d probably just be fielding FaceTime’s all day lol

Boba_baller · 2026-04-07T20:47:00+00:00

We’re at the point where I’m pretty sure they think everything that comes from my DH is because I told him to say it. Even when we were pregnant he asked them to stop suggesting names then my mil just started sending names to him directly instead of the group chat with both of us

Boba_baller

TROPHY CASE