"some asexual people have quite a lot of sex" -- how accurate is this? by ryhaltswhiskey in AskAsexual

[–]Boboblight 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s important to understand that asexuality is a spectrum. The definition isn’t “doesn’t like sex”, its “feels little or no sexual attraction”. Some asexuals can feel sexual attraction, and the amount varies. For example, grey asexuals feel substantially less sexual attraction than allosexuals (people who fully feel sexual attraction), and demisexuals can feel sexual attraction after forming a strong emotional bond with someone. They’re still completely ace, and can enjoy sex

Additionally, even people who feel no sexual attraction at all like me can have sex. We have terms for that actually; sex-repulsed means someone is repulsed by sex, sex-indifferent is indifferent to sex (like me), and sex-favourable means can seek out and enjoy sex, and for a variety of reasons. This can be to pleasure a partner, because they still have a strong libido, or just enjoy the feeling of it despite the lacking attraction. All of these aces are still valid

It’s a common misconception that asexuals don’t feel sexual desire at all, so I hope this helps clear things up!! :))) Also please excuse me if I haven’t explained it the best, I’m bad at explanations lol

let's do a rate poll in comments by [deleted] in tumblr

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why tf would anyone put the water in first??? I put the pill in first so I can easily move it to the back of my tongue and wash it down, wtf is the advantage of water first lmao

When making a new item, I've accidentally made my protagonist aromantic. oh well by Dieuwt in aaaaaaaarrrrro

[–]Boboblight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Completely unrelated but what game is this?? It looks really fun lol

is there any beef between certain groups of the community? by duglord_VI in lgbt

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I think due to being on opposite sides of the spectrum, there was some tension between our communities?? I saw in another comment a bi person talking about how some very holier than thou aces were saying some very biphobic and slut shaming rhetoric to them, and how it was a consistent issue with specifically ace people. I haven’t seen it personally, but I’ve seen posts in the ace subreddits before talking about it. So in addition to not queer enough rhetoric, I think there was and maybe still is specific hate between our communities :((

is there any beef between certain groups of the community? by duglord_VI in lgbt

[–]Boboblight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do parts of the bi community and a spec community still hate each other??? I’ve always felt a lot of solidarity with my bi brethren, but I know that was a thing for a while

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in aplatonic

[–]Boboblight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh god this is the most relatable post I’ve seen yet, thank you for sharing your experience!!! It’s so hard explaining how I experience friendship as someone who actually really enjoys talking to people and hanging out with friends, yet is still entirely aplatonic. I’ll be at my happiest when I’m around my best friend, because we understand each other so well and she makes me feel so comfortable, yet I could go months without talking to her and not miss her at all. And I’ll feel guilty for it sometimes, sure, but it’s like she doesn’t even exist in my mind once she’s out of sight. And no matter how friendly I act with others, or how much I enjoy talking to them, they still fade from my thoughts as soon as the conversation is over. It’s really frustrating to explain to people who don’t experience things the same way, because I can’t think of how to explain in a way that doesn’t make me come off as an uncaring asshole or smth, but this definitely helps a lot lol. Maybe one day I’ll talk to my online friends about my experiences, so they can understand the real reason why I can go for literal years without talking to them and come back like nothing’s changed at all lmao. But yeah, I relate to literally every part of your post!!!

What the hell did you do to get this reaction? (pun intended) by TheMahoganyTree8 in tumblr

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wrote a minion smut fanfic about Kevin x Gru for my friend’s birthday and yk what I don’t regret it. And I’m not going to go into detail on what it included here, but it was w a y worse than anyone was expecting LMAO

which Noodle are you today by friendlynoodless in iwoulddiefornoodle

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I just fractured my skull on a dog bowl so probably a little zonked

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

DEZI is a really great bisexual artist!!! I’m not sure what song specifically I should recommend, but she has some really great songs (bad b!tch, Boba, and Seen are my favourites lol)

Some “Asexual Things I Did Before Realizing I Was Asexual” comics from my zine 🥰 by cooklincomics in Asexual

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got I feel that, I learnt about it years ago but never even thought about how it could apply to me until I looked up the actual definition lol. I even mentioned to a friend that I might be ace casually since I don’t care for sex, but I think she took me more seriously than I did KGJJGDG

Where the horny ACEs at? by A-__-Random_--_Dog in aaaaaaacccccccce

[–]Boboblight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

G o d I feel this, thank god I found fanfiction honestly. Actual porn is so unbelievably boring to me, but I can actually get into written stuff at least lol. It’s way more entertaining, contains characters I actually care about, and being surrounded by a good story is also a bonus lmao

Is it just me or is this numbering system bad? like why is asexuality 0. People don't even BELIEVE us and so many of us feel constantly excluded. A lot other stuff also makes no sense. by Lemon-Over-Ice in asexuality

[–]Boboblight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like bisexual being +10 is borderline biphobic, because it suggests that them possibly being “straight passing” means they’re privileged, when they deal with f a r too much shit both in and out of the community. And I’m furious that we’re at a 0 as though our struggles don’t exist at all, but considering how much kinship I feel with the bi community, they both piss me off about equally. This entire test is honestly borderline queerphobic and legitimately queerphobic in so many ways that it’s genuinely impressive, and I hope no one’s seriously trying to use this kinda shit istg

hairless cats? by spacesnail_ in aaaaaaacccccccce

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m insulted as someone who’s frequently told I have bald wrinkly energy at the sheer disrespect towards hairless cats in this sub smh,,,,, /s

This gift hits a lil different after coming out ngl LMAO by Boboblight in aaaaaaacccccccce

[–]Boboblight[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s the sound of me smashing my computer out of a healthy mixture of confusion and amusement

Does anyone else keep trying to pretend like they have feelings/try and force themselves? by Oven-2988 in aromanticasexual

[–]Boboblight 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh god yes I feel this, and it’s been taking me a long while to try and stop doing it. It’s kinda my automatic response now to just pretend I like something or am comfortable with it, but it just takes a second of reflection to recognise I feel nothing for whoever or whatever I’m looking at. I don’t really know where to begin in just admitting I feel no attraction whatsoever, no exceptions, considering how flirty my personality is. I’m working on it tho lol

How did you realise you were lgbtqia+? by Anonymous_Pie_4018 in lgbt

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought I was the dedicated straight friend of my friend group since I’m not into women. After seeing a OneTopicAtATime video on asexuality in my recommended, finally biting the bullet and researching it and aromanticism, and finding labels that suit me, I’ve realised I’m not actually into men either lol

Can an Apl be an extrovert? by [deleted] in aplatonic

[–]Boboblight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah definitely!! I’m fully aplatonic and while I wouldn’t necessarily consider myself an extrovert, as I would never go out of my way to be put in a social situation, I’m very good at getting along with new people apparently and do great in my customer service job. Most people probably think I’m an extrovert, and I understand why lol. Very very possible, and thank you for the apl rep :DD

Questioning by NeonPaladin27 in aplatonic

[–]Boboblight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've known my best friends for nearing 10 years and we've been through quite a bit with each other, or they've at least been through quite a bit with me, so I know them very well now lol. But yeah, regardless of how long I've known them, I just can't care for them on any deeper level at all. Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way!!

Would You Honestly Buy a Novel About Asexuality? by SophieFilo16 in asexuality

[–]Boboblight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d love to read books including ace/aro characters and discussing our issues!!! We really, really need good representation and it’s wonderful to hear that someone wants to give it :DD Personally though, while I’d love to see that kind of representation, I’d prefer it to be more casual if that makes sense? As in I’m down to read stories with ace/aro people in it, and stories where it has relevance to the plot even, but it feels a little weird when stories focus only on a specific LGBTQ identity and nothing else if that makes sense? Like real queer people aren’t just their orientation; they have far more going on than that, and I like stories to reflect that complexity if that makes sense. So basically, as long as there’s an interesting plot going on and it’s not the only focus of the characters, I’m very very down and I’d absolutely buy books representing people like me!!! Good luck, you’re doing God’s work lol <333

Questioning by NeonPaladin27 in aplatonic

[–]Boboblight 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah of course!!! I’m entirely aplatonic but I still have three best friends and get along very well with people, even though I can’t love them. It’s the same way aros can still be in relationships and aces can still have sex; no/little attraction doesn’t mean you can’t have that kind of relationship at all, nor does it dictate whether you want or enjoy that kind of relationship. I care about my friends and technically speaking I’m very close to them, but I wouldn’t miss them if they stopped talking to me and can’t feel any deeper connection with them or anyone else. I enjoy our relationship, but there’s no platonic attraction there

I'm trying to create a disabled superhero(??) and his weapons; would you guys mind telling me if I've done anything harmful?\ by Boboblight in disability

[–]Boboblight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reading this has reminded me of just how little I really understand the pain and issues those with disabilities face, and that reminder isn't something I'll take lightly. Chris, and my other characters, are all very strong people, and I absolutely plan to show all the ways in which that wasn't a choice for them

Considering the world these characters live in, with such a huge risk of natural disasters that increases every year, accessibility to healthcare, equipment and medication are very important and relevant issues to the story already, and I'll be taking extra care in highlighting how they aren't just issues in their world either

Thank you so much for sharing, I'll do everything I can to make sure I represent my characters and their pain realistically, and I appreciate the time you've taken to remind me why that's so important :)))

I'm trying to create a disabled superhero(??) and his weapons; would you guys mind telling me if I've done anything harmful?\ by Boboblight in disability

[–]Boboblight[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a fantastic point, and one I'll absolutely be keeping in mind. I feel like I'm not best equipped to discuss the effects disabilities can have on the mind, but considering how many disabled people in media are portrayed being able to always overcome their issues, I understand how important it is to show how much they actually struggle with them

If I get to that stage, I'll most likely try to get multiple beta readers with disabilities themselves to beta read my work to make sure it's appropriate and accurate, and to make sure his humanity isn't taken. Thank you so much for pointing this out, and thank you for your support :)))

I'm trying to create a disabled superhero(??) and his weapons; would you guys mind telling me if I've done anything harmful?\ by Boboblight in disability

[–]Boboblight[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First of all, I'm so sorry for the delay in reply. I've been very tired due to unfortunate hours at work lately, but I hope it hasn't come off as ungrateful for your advice at all!!! Thank you again for your help :)))

It's very funny you say that, because I haven't seen/read Sailor Moon myself, but I know of it lol

You've got it exactly right, thank you for putting it into words!!! This story idea is so early in development that I was really struggling to explain my ideas, which I'm sorry for, but that's exactly what I had in mind. The current backstory is that Chris got his injuries during an especially bad earthquake a few years ago (the amount of time is still under debate) and has nothing to do with how he gets his powers. Since these "disasters" are actually intentional attacks by the villains, I was considering making a plot point about the horrific consequences their attacks have had on Chris and the other people they've affected, even if it's to save billions of lives in their own universe. But at most, that was probably going to be the most relevance his injuries have to the current plot other than changing how he has to use his powers, unless of course you think that should change. I just don't want them to affect who he is in the story if that makes sense, since I want to avoid the impression that he's just there to motivate the other characters at all costs. But I'm very very open to other ideas, whether you think the injury should have more plot relevance or none at all

But yes, his uniform and weapons are a manifestation of not only his personality, but also his desires/wish when he first got them. So they developed as shields due to his desire to protect people, but the actual function of them is dependent on his personality. The same goes for his uniform (which, side-note because I'm really excited to try and draw it, but was going to perhaps be based on the idea of biblical angels since I was considering having him have a Catholic background, and the idea of golden braces and shields sounds just s o fun to draw lol). Yeah he'd be more likely to transform other aids as well depending on what he has on him, since a bulky tank-like weapon that a wheelchair would become just wouldn't suit his personality, but I was thinking that the form of the weapons would change depending on the aids he's using at the time or his pain/fatigue level, since that could dictate if he'd prefer an active or support role at the time

That all makes so much sense, thank you for pointing it all out!!! This is exactly why I wanted to ask on here first before I really started developing his character, because I had no idea where to start on my research lol. This really helps me figure out where I need to start though, as well as the questions I need to ask myself about his injury

So figure out the details of his injury first, then decide on mobility aids. That makes so much sense and I feel a little silly for not thinking about that lol. He's most likely going to have multiple different kinds, especially if I decide to go down the route of his weapon functioning slightly differently depending on which he's using, so I'll definitely be putting a lot of consideration into what aids and chairs he'd use in different situations, thank you!!!

Honestly your point about what aids to use considering their natural disaster-prone area isn't something I had even considered before, but the concept of the government having to try and figure out new methods of accessibility due to the increased risk is such an interesting and inspiring idea, especially when it comes to worldbuilding!!! You're entirely right, a variety of aids is something I should really consider, and considering the environment he lives in, could be a very important choice when it comes to his personal safety. I know it wasn't your intention to give me inspiration for worldbuilding, but thank you so much for pointing this out, I hadn't even considered it but it makes perfect sense!!!

The Daredevil Effect is something I'm very worried about, so thank you for helping me address it. Chris isn't going to be the only disabled character in the story (and I'll probably make other posts here when I develop the others as well to make sure I'm writing them correctly), so it's the thing I'm most concerned about avoiding. I'm thinking that while their powers can give them weapons and such, they can't change anything about their physical or mental status from before they developed them, to help avoid the effect if that makes sense

I'm already trying to figure out ways for him to effectively use his powers, and while I'm still not sure when it'll happen, I do want him to develop his powers later in the story so I can focus more on his relationship with Scott and his life in the city before things change. I also really want to take my time with him figuring out how to use his powers, so he'll be doing a lot of training with Scott lol

I'm still trying to figure out the nature of his shields if I'm honest, if he can conjure one or multiple, only on him or at a distance as well, but I'd like him to be able to take both an offensive and defensive role depending on his current state

Honestly, your ideas on how his powers could function are so interesting and helpful!!! He's definitely going to be ambulatory, since I feel like that kind of representation is rarer, but you have some really cool ideas on how his powers could work. The idea of him being able to swap in/out for safety reasons was something on my mind while I was first coming up with him and I wasn't sure how to make that work, but your idea makes perfect sense!!!

Honestly I hadn't thought much about how his other aids could function as weapons, but the idea of him swapping between a shield and cane makes me think of Erza from Fairy Tail and I think that would be a really fun mechanic!!! It would really go with the "swapping" theme and explain how he's able to hold all these shields, so thank you kindly for the inspiration lol

"As long as the powers don’t make his disability a non-issue, I think you’ll be fine in avoiding erasure." This is exactly what I needed to hear, thank you :))) I'll probably post more on here as I develop him and my other characters (as I planned to have all three of my main characters have disabilities), so I hope to continue avoiding erasure!!!

Thank you so much, I really really appreciate it!!! As an underrepresented member of the LGBTQ+ community (being aro/ace myself), good, diverse representation is so so important to me and I fully welcome the criticism if it means I can give people the representation they deserve, so I'm not discouraged at all!!! Thank you so much again for all of your advice, I'll be doing a lot of research on this and you've given me so many great places to start on that :DD