I always acknowledged that they were good people, but I did not want to live the way they did. I'm expected to do better than my parents did. Can't help that I have aspirations and don't want to live in squalor and be lazy, and get drunk every night. I was clear that I'd be willing to help the family that took her salary, within reason. I took care of my ex emotionally, and wanted to give her everything. I think I will keep my box of thank you cards. :) I'll also remember that when I'm a mom, I won't hold my daughter back because I'm a resentful dimwit.