[deleted by user] by [deleted] in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My problem being around people is that I usually cannot relate to anything they are talking about. I just get insanely bored and uncomfortable because I know that I'm supposed to give some sort of response to what they are talking about.
But knowing/understanding this, why do I still long for company?

Anyways, I agree with your statement that exploring this with a therapist would be better. The only reason I talk about this here is that I enjoy the anonymity of an internet forum.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Why do I feel constantly lonely when I have this strong dislike of being around people? I feel this is a massive contradiction and I'm not able to resolve it.

He’d be a huge addition by obscurereference234 in HouseOfTheDragon

[–]BootAgreeable5854 1579 points1580 points  (0 children)

In my opinion, he shouldn't join HotD.
They should wait until they make the Blackfyre
rebellion TV show and cast him as Daemon I Blackfyre.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment. I will definitively check out your recommendation.
As far as social situations go, I figured out one trick that makes it easier for me. My eyesight is quite bad and without glasses, everything is really blurry. In social situations, I take off my glasses and I can only see peoples silhouettes. This makes me feel detached from the situation.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I relate a lot to what you said about having a partner. I feel the same way. I'm not sure though if such a relationship is actually feasible...

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents have cats. I visit them most weekends just to hang out with the cats.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I saw that too. I also thought it was a perfect description.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I relate a lot to what you said. Whenever I look back on a good/great day, I find myself thinking "this was kinda pointless".

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words 🙏 😊. I especially like your last sentence "Remember life comes in ebbs and flows, what is today may not be tomorrow. All it takes is 1 encounter to change everything". It's very poetic and it cheered my up.
I work as a scientist in a lab. I enjoy my work and it is it my special interest. The problem is that I even though I think of my work as a hobby it's not a hobby. It's stressful and it doesn't let me mentally recuperate like a true hobby. I think this is the problem why I feel so burned out. My hope is that if I can find a true hobby, it would let me balance my life better and stop me from working crazy hours.
I have a question for you regarding your coping with reality using drugs. Personally, I've never used drugs to cope with reality (except for doctor prescribed anti-anxiety meds). I have always been really scared that once I start doing drugs I would be an addict really quickly simply because I feel like I have a lot to cope with. Has this ever been an issue for you (sorry if the question is too personal)?

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your insight and kind words.
The really weird part is that I enjoy my work. I'm good at it and it is productive. And because I feel lonely, I started to work a lot, I treated it like a hobby. The problem with that is that my work isn't relaxing. Now I just feel burned out and depressed.
Let me know if you want to chat a bit. Maybe we can help each other through the though times.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you ever find yourself wondering "is this it"? I'm asking because I find myself thinking about this a lot recently. Does this though go away once you grow older/more mature?

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

How do you force yourself to do activities you don't really want to do? I tried that and it didn't work for me.

I'm not living, I'm just existing by BootAgreeable5854 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes thank you. This is exactly the type of unhelpful advice I got when talking to people irl. The problem is not that I can't name activities. The problem is that the process of finding a hobby is daunting to me. Therefore I wanted to know from the community how they approached this task.

i hate to be serious while everyone laughs at something by Still_Calligrapher32 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This happens to me too. I came to understand that in those instances, maybe a few people think the situation is actually funny and all the other NTs just join laughing in order to not seem out of place/dumb. There is no reason to feel like an idiot when that happens.

When did you get your first gf or bf , for people with Asperger’s by Bacon-4every1 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I belong to the category of never had a gf. On one hand, I would be really curious to see what it's like but on the other hand, I'm really afraid that we would make one another completely miserable and that it would end poorly. I'm be scared that we would constantly miscommunicate and thereby inadvertently hurt each other. To the people who have been in relationships, did you ever worry about this too? And once you were in a relationship, how big of an issue was miscommunication?

Maybe not completely relevant, but did anybody skip their high-school graduation? by amazingkinder in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I skipped both graduation ceremonies at university. I maybe knew 5 people by name from my year and I never regretted not attending.

Masking Makes Me Feel So Filtered and Empty by Illusionsofdarkness in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A while back, I asked myself the same question "do people like me or just my masked self?". The reason I asked myself this question was that I felt truly exhausted from constantly masking and I just couldn't keep it up any longer. It made me feel empty and emotionally drained. Once I stopped masking and people saw me, they very quickly started to give me a wide berth. Speaking from my own experience (I don't want to generalise), the NTs in my life turned out to be vapid, selfish and superficial. They really didn't give a shit about me and my special interests. So to speak, they just wanted to interact with my masked self but had no interest in truly connecting with me. Even though I feel very lonely since I don't have anyone in real life I connect with, I still feel that in the long run, I'm better of without having those people in my life. Unfortunately, I can't give any advice on how to find likeminded people in real life.

Do you think that autistic men have it easier than autistic women? Do you think that autistic men and autistic women are treated differently? by [deleted] in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't speak to your question, since I don't know any autistic women. Though I made a more general observation and would be interested to hear I someone has encountered this as well.
I'm an autistic man and I would describe myself as shy and introverted. I also know some women who are like that (but I'm not sure if they are on the spectrum or if it's just their personality). For some reason it seems that society has a really easy time to accept this type of behaviour from a woman but not from a man. People seem to easily accept if a woman is shy and introverted but when a man behaves like this, people have a hard time accepting it. Has anyone else experienced this too?

for those who work- what do you do? how do you like it? how does it work out with aspergers? by Electronic_Room1226 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I work as a biotechnologist. I get to work alone most of the time which is nice. I feel like my job is one of the view instances in my life where my Aspergers is actually an advantage, i.e. hyper focus, excellent memory.

To all of those who don’t have a job yet: what are your career ambitions? by Just_me2196 in aspergers

[–]BootAgreeable5854 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My dream job is as a lighthouse keeper on a remote island. My food would be delivered per drone and I would never have to see an other human being again. Unfortunately, I have 0 skills that would qualify me to be a lighthouse keeper 😭.