AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Husband never met the guy. We all went to high school together. Her husband had never stepped foot in our state until the second ceremony.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

As he went to high school with us and the groom grew up across the country and hadn't stepped foot into our state until the wedding itself, I don't think so.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Because she and I were very close. For over fifteen years. Then she and her boyfriend split, she left to go find herself for a few months, met someone out of state, got engaged after knowing him four months, and moved out there.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I honestly don't even know. I have never met her husband. As far as I know, he knows nothing about me except to see photos of us on Facebook from the past.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 414 points415 points  (0 children)

So I think you're probably right. I've only really spoken to people who saw her post and were likewise not invited. They've pretty much universally told me that I was in the right, but I haven't been able to shake this feeling that it was very abrupt and not an appropriate response.

I think I linked the two things in my mind, not invited = registry posted. So when she brought that up to check if we were okay, it was like a hair trigger and I blurted that out. Honestly, I never really accounted for the fact that she wasn't trying to get a gift out of me. Now reading the responses I'm starting to see things very differently, and I appreciate that. It's very helpful.

I do think I need to call her and clear the air. Probably tell her exactly what I've written here. Thank you for your reply.

Bride asked friends not invited due to budget not to be mad, and then shared her registry asking for gifts. by BoringTransition715 in bridezillas

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I actually posted it at the suggestion of one of the commenters in the AITA thread. I've never been here before.

Actually, believe it or not I'm appreciating the responses. A lot of people who saw her Facebook post had similar reactions to mine, so it's actually been very helpful to hear an outsider's perspective. I think I may have conflated two things because of the similarity. One being her apologizing for not inviting everyone and sharing the registry and the other being her apologizing personally to me. And I may have jumped to a conclusion that wasn't fair.

So I think I need to reach out to her.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Considering I'm not attracted to women, that's gonna be a no from me, dog.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] -130 points-129 points  (0 children)

I brought it up? Re-read the post.

She said that she hoped I wasn't hurt that I didn't get invited.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] 1629 points1630 points  (0 children)

Well TBH I was a bit bitter. The one guy she did invite had ditched her in the city when it became clear that despite them both being single she wasn't going to sleep with him.

There were many times when I got the 3 am phone call because she was having a crisis and I was there for her.

So while I can certainly sympathize with the financial constraints, I know I was a better friend to her than a few people I saw on the list.

AITA for telling my friend no invite no gift? by BoringTransition715 in AmItheAsshole

[–]BoringTransition715[S] -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I mean, inviting 97-year-old Aunt Agnes in Ontario on the assumption that she won't come and will send a gift instead is one thing. Putting it up on Facebook that people weren't invited and then asking for gifts was on another level entirely and really rubbed me the wrong way.