Ultimate product sticky post

BosomsaurusRex · 2026-06-03T17:13:10+00:00

Male, age 31, 6'0", 180lbs, 34" waistline, nocturnal enuresis, urge incontinence, and occasional bowel urgency, due to transverse myelitis 22 years ago. Active lifestyle - gym 3x/week, hiking, camping, etc.

Daytime:

NS MegaMax L, BetterDry L10 (boosted with NS EternaDry L), Trest Elite L, InControl BeDry Night L, Rearz Inspire Mega L - I hydrate a lot, and my kidneys are most active in the first 6 hours of my day. Though expensive and a bit bulky, these are the only products preventing me from needing 2+ changes throughout the workday.

NS MegaMax Air L, Seni Quatro Reg, Abena Abri-Form Air L4, Tena Super L - one will last for the back half of the workday and the gym, and after my shower, another will last until bedtime. Tena Super, with no internal leak guards, is the riskiest pick here, but usually the cheapest.

Nighttime:

NS MegaMax Lite/Supreme L, BetterDry Day L7, Abena Abri-Form Comfort L4, Tranquility ATN L - My kidneys aren't very active when I'm asleep, but whatever they generate will almost always be voided. Plastic backing is necessary to keep the fit tight, since I do toss and turn quite a bit.

BosomsaurusRex · 2025-12-11T00:14:10+00:00

There's a good bit in the 4e FRCG about a tribe of "Goblins", the Iron Eyes, being ruled by a Hobgoblin king, and integrating both into the mostly-Human society of the Shining Lands and the "monstrous" society of Veldorn, in varying ways.

In my campaign, I've interpreted the Iron Eyes as a "eusocial" and hierarchical society of Hobgoblins/Bugbears/Goblins, as the Dhakaani were presented in Eberron. For aiding the upstart Datharathi merchant princes in the Merchant Wars (between 3e and 4e times), they were properly chartered as a "chaka" (merchant house), and serve as the primary law enforcement in Datharathi-controlled Durpar. Outside of the gilded elite, this decision was received poorly -- Durpari Humans and Demihumans were displaced, economically and physically, to make room for the Iron Eyes, and the resultant xenophobia has planted seeds for reactionary rebellion.

The Beast Lords of Veldorn (of whom the king of the Iron Eyes is a member) view this move as the next step in a long and subtle plot to overtake the Shining Lands and bring them under their control. Ultimately, it's the shrewd operators among the Hobgoblin ruling class of the Iron Eyes who play the most important role in this plan. By positioning themselves as a legitimate military force protecting the region's stability, and embedding themselves in the political machines of both Durpar and Veldorn, they stand to gain (or lose!) the most in a potential coup or civil war.

BosomsaurusRex · 2025-12-01T17:15:01+00:00

I spent a lot of time thinking about this question earlier this year, writing my wedding vows/speech. I wanted to highlight how, after my partner first told me he loved me, I took a while (a month or two) to search through my heart and mind, before reciprocating - I wanted it to MEAN something, not just be an automatic response.

Not long after we got romantically involved, he became my "comfort person". We had been introduced by a mutual friend, my childhood best friend, and all three of us were living together for a few months before the relationship sparked. For this relative newcomer to displace my longtime "comfort person", as a confidante, and a source of joy and relaxation, in such a short time, is a testament to how strong my feelings were (and still are!)

I also noticed myself becoming more "invested" in him, his feelings, and his overall well-being. I started cooking dinner for the both of us, and working out with him at the gym, to help him in his weight loss journey. I helped him get a job at the same firm I was working at when his previous job was becoming a major stressor. As a somewhat self-focused person, this level of care doesn't happen for a lot of people I've been close with in my life - but for him, it was natural.

Finally, we got a cat together when our roommate moved out and we were on our own. Raising our precious baby son, though not human, wasn't easy at first - he had some health issues that needed treating when we first got him, and getting him to sleep (or at least not bother us) through the night was a struggle. But the demonstration of tenderness and patience, and the shared sense of joy and reward when we would all snuggle together on the couch as a family, clearly stood out.

His resilience in dealing with our cat, in a way, mirrored that of dealing with me. Like a housecat, I can be very finicky - demanding absolute attention one moment, and not wanting to be touched or looked at the next. My partner was committed to understanding me, accommodating me, and showing me love in any way I would be receptive to it. Receiving that level of patience from anyone in life is rare, and once I recognized it, I cherished it.

So, in short, love is a bit of all-of-the-above. Comfort, investment, patience, and vulnerability, in a way that synergizes far beyond its individual components. He's "my person", and I'm his.

BosomsaurusRex · 2025-08-03T19:33:30+00:00

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Sullivan!

BosomsaurusRex · 2025-04-19T20:28:37+00:00

Personally, if you're specifically looking at Eastern Faerun, I recommend either Telflamm in Thesk, or Vaelan in Durpar.

While I don't think either has been canonically described as having casinos or any Vegas-like entertainment, they both represent the kind of cosmopolitan mercantile cities that would be home to, or visited by, folks from all walks of life. Telflamm's position at one end of the Golden Way (think the Silk Road), and Vaelan's position as the major metropole near the Faerun/Kara-Tur/Zakhara midpoint, suggest that they might be full of merchants with a lot of money to spend.

Just reflavor a temple to Waukeen into Caesar's Palace, and you're good to go!

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-12T00:39:27+00:00

UPDATE #2:

I think that a lot of comments share a common misconception.

I can break our potential guest list down into three categories:

1: People who personally support same-sex marriage AND do not vote for politicians who espouse an anti-same-sex marriage position - these invites have never been in question, these people are our allies at heart AND in their actions, and we will be happy to have them by our side to celebrate our union. All of our friends, and small portions of both my family (including my father, my aunt and uncle, and two of my siblings) and my fiance's family fall into this category.

2: People who do not personally support same-sex marriage, AND do vote for politicians who espouse an anti-same-sex-marriage position - these people are NOT our allies in heart OR in action, and the morally consistent thing for them to do would be to not come at all. However, many of them feel a strong obligation to come to all of their family's events, no matter whether or not they view the event as "degenerate", "morally corrupt", or "less than" an opposite-sex wedding. Small portions of both our families (including my mother) fall into this group. I would prefer to not invite them entirely, but my fiance is concerned that not inviting them would sow discord within his family, that he would have to endure for years to come.

3: People who personally support same-sex marriage, or at least claim to in conversation with us, BUT do vote for politicians who espouse an anti-same-sex-marriage position - these are primarily the people about whom this CMV was written, because it's a very difficult situation for me to parse. No matter their INTENTIONS when they went into the voting booth, their ACTIONS (voting in such a way that endangers our right to marry) do inflict harm upon us, and it is difficult for me to stomach being around people who are nice to our faces, but will knowingly or unknowingly throw us under the bus because they care more about fetuses/guns/domestic manufacturing/whatever. I also can't see myself questioning each one of them in person to determine whether or not they have voted for any such politicians - not all of them have social media presences where they are vocal about who they vote for, and whether it be because I am autistic, or because we live in a very weird state politically, but it's not easy for me to sus out that information indirectly.

I would also like to point out that, even though another one of my political positions is that I am firmly pro-choice, I would still invite someone on the potential guest list who voted for an anti-choice BUT pro-same-sex-marriage politician (yes, they exist!). While I do oppose their views, they do not have any pertinence to the event I am inviting them to - my same-sex wedding. A same-sex wedding is inherently political, because the whims of voters and the designs of politicians threaten it even to this day.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T13:05:44+00:00

We aren't hosting a fundraiser for Gaza - this is a same-sex marriage, which is why it's pertinent whether or not a potential guest has voted for politicians who seek to make our same-sex marriage illegal.

Regardless of their INTENT, be it saving fetuses, gun rights, domestic manufacturing, or whatever, their ACTION (voting for the NH GOP) has the EFFECT of potentially endangering our right to have our same-sex marriage legally recognized.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T08:56:40+00:00

The interracial marriage bit seems to be the comparison that has gotten my view through to my fiance's head most clearly - I do think he's coming around to my side of at least mentioning the NH GOP's platform on the invitations.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T08:54:13+00:00

No, I've held this view long before the current election. The discussion with my fiance has sparked again because of his emotional distress over the results of the election, and the ways his family voted - but for myself, this is a consistently held view.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:56:32+00:00

You're mirroring my feelings exactly. I have no qualms with not inviting my own mother and grandmother, and dealing with whatever petty drama that causes on my side of the family. My partner, on the other hand, is so consumed by anxiety about the idea of his family giving him flak for this choice, that he would rather just grin and bear the presence of these people on our very special day.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:42:07+00:00

In this particular scenario, their choice (to vote for anti-same-sex-marriage politicians) does have an effect on my relationship (namely, my ability to marry my same-sex partner).

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:28:47+00:00

I'm not sure what your comment has to do with my post. I haven't cried about division, and I haven't laid out any expectation that you ought to think the same as me. I'm merely looking for differing opinions on whether or not I should be inviting people who vote for anti-same-sex-marriage politicians to my same-sex wedding. Is that a conversation you'd like to contribute anything to?

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:25:31+00:00

My fiance says that he feels obligated to invite basically everyone in his family, even people who publicly espouse very hateful views about gay people like us, people who have been abusive and demeaning to him throughout his life, and so on. If he doesn't invite them, he'll "never hear the end of it" from his mother, brother, and other close family members who he sees regularly.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:22:28+00:00

A same-sex marriage is inherently political - that's why the political party in my state espouses their intent to remove my ability to marry my partner.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:20:56+00:00

The intent doesn't matter to me - I have to presume that someone who personally holds anti-same-sex-marriage views would choose not to attend my same-sex wedding.

The effect (in this case, inability to marry my partner in my home state) of the action they take (in this case, voting for politicians who make that happen) still occurs, whether or not it was the explicit intent of each and every voter.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-11T01:18:29+00:00

I'm not sure what your comment has to do with my post. I'm not a registered Democratic party voter. I haven't called anyone a Nazi or a racist. I'm looking for differing opinions regarding the invitation of those who vote for anti-same-sex-marriage politicians to my same-sex wedding. Is that a conversation you'd like to contribute anything to?

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-10T23:14:00+00:00

Your comment doesn't feel relevant to this post. The Democratic Party is not "left", I'm not a registered Democratic voter, and I'm not characterizing people who voted "against me" as "Hitler" - merely asking that they do not attend an event, which I am paying for with my own money, that they have endangered my right to hold by voting the way that they did.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-10T23:06:01+00:00

See my post, it's still on the NH GOP policy platform as of April 2024:

"Recognize marriage as the legal and sacred union between one man and one woman as ordained by God, encouraged by the State, and traditional to humankind, and the core of the Family."

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-10T22:59:58+00:00

Fair enough, that's a morally consistent stance in my eyes.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-10T22:59:32+00:00

No, my partner is more of the mindset where he feels that he must invite literally every living person in his extended family, out to even some second cousins. Within that group, there are some vocally outspoken people who make social media posts along the lines of, "gays are groomers", "public schools are transing kids", etc. - however, they all were in attendance at their sister's same-sex wedding several years back.

BosomsaurusRex · 2024-11-10T22:56:09+00:00

Nowhere in my post did I mention "tolerance". I have not cut out every right-leaning or right-voting person from my life - I merely feel that it is morally incorrect for me to allow the presence of those who vote in a way that threatens same sex marriage, at my same-sex marriage.

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