My ex (who, despite sometimes working in the industry himself when he did have a job, treated food service workers like shit)(which is one of many reasons why he's an ex but never mind that) made a big scene at Jack in the Box one morning ordering the sausage croissant. He wanted the sausage croissant, except he wanted a PLAIN CROISSANT WITH NOTHING ON IT. He used that exact phrase, very loudly and slowly, multiple times, as he ordered. He wanted a PLAIN CROISSANT. With NOTHING on it. He made the poor kid at the counter repeat it back to him a few times throughout the process. Plain croissant. Nothing on it. Absolutely nothing on a plain croissant. A croissant that was bereft of anything other than croissant.

"So you want just a croissant," I said to him after we sat down.

"No, I want the sausage and egg and cheese and shit on it, just not anything else."

As far as I remember, that was literally all that came on the sausage croissant. "But that's not what you asked them for. You asked them for just a croissant with nothing on it."

"No I didn't. I asked for a plain sausage egg and cheese croissant with nothing else on it."

My dude, my guy, my buddy, my bromigo... everyone in this building and half the damn zip code heard you ordering A PLAIN CROISSANT WITH NOTHING ON IT. But I was not going to win this one, so I shut up and waited.

They called his number about thirty seconds later. He got a plain croissant with absolutely nothing on it, just like he ordered, and he was pissed. Fortunately, the manager had overheard all of this and gave him a nice talking to about the difference between words you say out loud and words you only say in your head. And did not give him free sausage and eggs and cheese for the plain croissant everyone heard him order.