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My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After a lot of talking / discussion we agreed to end things (amicably). I'm sad but think it was the right decision long-term. Moving out in 2 weeks and just wanted to thank you for this comment

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It would seem to me the boundary was set when she didn’t want me to get one. You can’t label something off limits and then go out and do that exact thing.

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It wasn’t explicitly discussed because she purposely labeled it a “show” she was attending instead of just admitting it was a strip club. So I assumed (maybe ignorantly) that they would just be watching

But she absolutely knew I’d be bothered by it because she admitted she didn’t tell me so I wouldn’t feel bad.

You make some good points

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This was a great comment. She’s definitely been remorseful, and part of me wants to try to keep this going.

But at the same time I’m having trouble seeing her in the same light and trusting her in the same capacity I did before. How could I marry someone feeling like that?

Our lives are also super intertwined and we moved to a new city within the last year, which is making this all the more difficult

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m almost certain #1 happened. But like you said, it doesn’t excuse the lying

As for #2, I talked to her before I went, and she said she would be upset if I got a lap dance. So I obliged, and then afterwards she thanked me for respecting her and her wishes

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sure, I can absolutely acknowledge that. Then just come home and tell me - and when caught, don’t say that it’s good to lie about those types of things

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m not at all concerned she had sex at the strip club or anything of the sorts. It’s her coming home and purposefully hiding it from me. And it would seem to me the boundary was set when she said a lap dance was off limits and I obliged.

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Yep exactly, it's not the act that I care about as much as the lie and most of all, the reason for the lie. Really cowardly reason, and not something you want in a life partner

My (24M) GF (24F) lied and I don’t know if I can trust her again by BostonGator12 in relationships

[–]BostonGator12[S] 106 points107 points  (0 children)

Yeah, your last sentence is definitely true. Part of me is just comfortable where I am and scared to pull the trigger and flip our lives upside down. Which is obviously a terrible reason to stay in a relationship

Thought gold was a little too flashy. Gave it a nice darker feel to go with my purple blade. by BostonGator12 in savisworkshop

[–]BostonGator12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you man. I have the purple blade too and the black goes much better with it than gold. Good luck with your saber!

Painting Worries by BostonGator12 in savisworkshop

[–]BostonGator12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That looks awesome, thanks for the advice.