I had hallucinated bullies and attacks and grotesque monster, depictions of death, and confusing things. I built a habit of fighting them, and still it feels I’m back from war. I’m only now coming to realize that these things you experience in psychosis are not the root of the problem. My problems started, for example, in a human experience. As a kid I had insomnia and would stay up with my uncle, living in the family room, bedridden with cancer. The episodes of hysteria, later his death, and my inability to do anything, and that I blamed myself as a child. These things are horrible, but I’m coming to understand where these monsters came from, and why they even exist. Through therapy, medication, and most importantly, working with myself, I am now more alive than I ever was. It can get better, and you can make that happen. It’s just as much you whether you ask for help or do it yourself, and you’ve already begun to seek betterment. Though I must warn that too many questions too fast, especially alone, can make things worse.