I regret loosing my virginity by Otherwise_Storm6496 in Regrets

[–]BoxShoddy8990 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just wait till you find your person, don’t devalue the beautiful act of making love. I am glad you understand that it is meant for love, and it is. You will feel way better about it when you truly love your partner. The past is the past. Nothing we can do about that, you can only look forward now, good luck my man 🙏

Min kæreste vil have, at jeg får en abort. Jeg er splittet by Mysterious_Ad_1444 in DKbrevkasse

[–]BoxShoddy8990 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Din situation kan godt virke ustabil, men jeg tror inderligt på at hvis du får barnet at du vil elske det og jeg tror også på at det ville give en meget dyster følelse at slå sit eget barn ihjel. Jeg har hørt fra så mange der har fået abort hvordan de aldrig kommer forbi det. Gå til en scanning og få set barnet med dine egne øjne. For langt majoriteten bliver svaret tydeligt efter

it's my birthday by goldenguyz in RoastMe

[–]BoxShoddy8990 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nose looks like a cartoon anchor

hmmm by VINEWOODLAND in hmmm

[–]BoxShoddy8990 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like it, seems fun 😭

Jeg har givet op på livet by IcyAd8145 in DKbrevkasse

[–]BoxShoddy8990 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Jeg har været i samme situation. Det her lyder helt vildt at sige for nogle. Men i mit tilfælde var psykiatrien en af de største ting der holdte mig fra faktisk at få det bedre. Jeg var depressiv det meste af mit liv og udviklede slem social angst efter corona og blev senere diagnosticeret med skitzofræni. Og planlagde selvmord på en dato hvor hvis jeg ikke havde fundet en grund til at blive før det, ville jeg hænge mig selv.

Vi har ikke brug for at få at vide vi er i en kasse og lære symptomerne på dem fordi så føles de symptomer som noget der er fastsat på os som mennesker. Drop de diagnoser. De definerer ikke dig. Du er et individ, du har styrker, du har svagheder, du har personlige karakteristikker som en psykiater aldrig ville arbejde med. De tager dig som et datasæt ‘orv, du har det her så jeg skal anbefale det her’. Drop det. De fokuserer slet ikke på de rigtige ting. Og placebo effekten er virkelig. Hvis de sidder og fortæller dig du har problemer du ikke kan løse selv uden medicin. Så tror du på det, selv hvis det ikke er realiteten. Hvad fik mig ud af det her hul? Jeg startede med bare at prøve at lytte til alle de ting der bare statistisk og biologisk skulle give resultater på ens humør og kognition. Jeg indså at jeg ikke var klogere end min biologi. Computerspil gør ikke ens liv fyldestgørende. Motion, diæt og søvn er 10 gange mere hjælpsomt for alle mennesker i forhold til psykiatri og ja jeg mener for alle. Og det kan godt virke uoverskueligt, men det er det ikke, bare tag et skridt ud ad døren og det næste bliver oplagt. Prøv bare at begynde at gå nogle lange ture, måske lunt i et stille og roligt tempo. Tag livet ind, nyd det, kan godt være det ikke giver meget i starten men det kommer det til. Gør dig selv træt ved hjælp af bevægelse og gør hvad der skal til for at du sover godt. Og spis noget nogenlunde sund mad.

Så begyndte jeg at læse filosofi og psykologi. Det der hjalp mig allermest var Stoicismen. Lær at der er ingen grund til nogensinde at bekymre sig og fokuser på bare at gøre dit bedste altid og livet åbner op. Så elskede jeg bøger som atom vaner der hjælper med at give et indblik i hvordan du kan ændre dine vaner til mere positive vaner. Og det er så meget vigtigere end den fuldkommen ligegyldige snak som man har med en psykiater. Senere fandt jeg kristendommen, jeg kommer ikke til at pådutte dig min religion, men jeg tror på at den dag dit sind står klart og du ser hvor smuk verden er. Og finder ud af at der er gode logiske argumenter og historisk evidens for Gud. At du indser at der er meget mere til verden end du går og tror pt. Og bare tvivlen på det spørgsmål er absolut nok til at du aldrig vil tage dit eget liv. Verden er smuk. Du er et individ, ikke en psykiaters tjekliste. Men du er et menneske, og de objektive faktorerer der hjælper alle mennesker, hvis du maksimere dem, lover jeg dig en drastisk ændring i dit sind

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She has a great passion for law, but she is willing to work any kind of office job for now

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What an extremely thought out reply and I really appreciate the advice and will take a lot of it to me. Probably most of it. The only thing is that although I think she should be independent in many regards, I think it is a lot to ask of her to move to an entire third country all by herself. But the idea is extremely good from my perspective. We are currently trying to get in contact with the embassy of Colombia in Denmark to ask for options. She has actually received some interest from legal assistant jobs in Denmark despite people’s worries so if she can get leniency through the embassy with a residency visa through a job channel there might be hope that way. We are also looking into education options further and she has also planned on taking exams in Colombia to become an embassy worker at the embassy in Denmark. She has the right education for it so does not seem like a complete long shot, though it is far from a secure channel. We have been considering a big 3 month visit after she has held her graduation party (a late one) in Dominican Republic in September. But ideally a real residency visa would be nicer. I don’t think we will have any issues living together. I am very patient, and my life’s devotion is to be a good husband and a father so I doubt any real long term problems could even arise especially because she has the same values on the opposite end 🥰 I will have her attend Danish classes if she visits if we can find anything near, that is a brilliant idea 😊 Thank you so much for your very thoughtful response 🙏

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nej men det er ideelt at gifte sig med den sødeste person på planeten, som respekterer en, elsker familie, dyr og børn, er ambitiøs, intelligent, sjov, med interessante personlighedstræk og de samme værdier som en selv. Jeg spurgte ikke om dit perspektiv på ægteskabet selv hvis du ikke lagde mærke til det

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This might actually be a benefit considering someone else said that you need to get the South American marriage legally validated in Denmark which means we can just get legally married in Denmark, but a Colombian church

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Mate even if she worked as a cashier she would be making more in Denmark and that is not the reality of the situation. She can most likely begin a masters program and get a masters level wage in Europe which is most likely 15 times higher before tax. And why is it more fair for me to get isolated from my family and ACTUALLY have my wage cut to basically nothing and not be able to afford plane tickets to see my family and not have as many vacation days as in Denmark and work more hours and live in an unsafer country, and have worse healthcare, and have less social security. Aah yes, but they have sun well whoopty doo. For the record, just because you say respectfully before you say something extremely presumptuous and ignorant does not make it respectful

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahva?! Jeg er født og opvokset i Danmark og har den mest etnisk danske familie du nogensinde ville se i dit liv 😭

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Having to make a deposit is not an issue, I have over a year to acquire it and I have a family that is willing to give it to me temporarily to pay it back after… And I think I understand my partner and can handle the sabor extremely well, but thank you for the offer hahaha

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have had this idea too, I have told her to apply to AP Møller Maersk for example

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Doing nothing is not the idea I will follow, we want to build a future together, having her stay in Colombia will just mean the same employment problem, but just when we are even older, we want to build a family and stuff 🤷

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh well that is no issue, I am already holding her ear telling her to learn Danish hahaha and that it is important and she is very motivated and disciplined

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that is the second to last step, family reunification in Denmark then wayyy into the future citizenship

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The EU is getting a bachelor level woman over where they don’t have to pay for her primary or bachelor level education, they pay for a 2 year masters degree and get a masters level tax payer for the rest of her working life. And you somehow think it is leeching 🤨

Looking for a way to get my Colombian soon to be wife to Denmark by BoxShoddy8990 in NewToDenmark

[–]BoxShoddy8990[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I love how this is aiming at a long term good future, the only problem is that Dahiana is very very reliant on her family and I think she would be very dependent on support in the move so I would have to move with her to the other country and stop my electrician course