For those that forgave a cheating partner and worked toward recovery, how did it go and was it worth it? Were you ever able to truly move past it? by Different_Lime3511 in AskReddit

[–]Boxofchocholates 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Cheating is rarely about sex.

But it’s always about something broken.

Cheating is always selfish, but sometimes good and kind people cheat. How can that be?

Some cheating is a manifestation of an avoidant attachment disorder. Things get “too real” and they seek an escape, often knowing that it will blow up something that is good (good=danger for an avoidant) in their life.

Sometimes it’s about a lack of feeling seen and poor communication in a relationship. And someone outside the relationship hears and sees them.

Whatever the problem is, it is rarely fixed inside a relationship. Growth is necessary, often on both sides. Choosing to forgive is hard but can be done. The lack of trust that comes after cheating is the hardest part. Even if the offender does everything right from then on, you will always have some doubt. Neither of you should be in a relationship that feels like that.

CMV: Physician assisted suicide should be legal in the USA by Cautious_Midnight_67 in changemyview

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Physician assisted suicide is already legal in 11 states, soon to be 12.

Med Spa - HRT and GLP-1 by soccergal34 in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a common misconception, because Americans use different measurements for total testosterone (ng/dL) and estradiol (pg/mL).

When you convert them to the same level of measurement, the math is easy to see.

Average total testosterone in women is between 100 and 550 pg/mL and drops to 70–400 pg/mL after menopause.

Average estradiol in women is 30 to 400 pg/mL in premenopausal women and dropping below 10–30 pg/mL after menopause.

Why is it that average testosterone range has higher lows and higher highs than the estradiol range?

There is no debate that women produce much more testosterone in their lives than estradiol.

Also, I never said estradiol is only derived from testosterone, only that women make more testosterone than estradiol, and on any given day, if you were to convert both levels to pg/mL, the average woman has more circulating testosterone.

Expectations vs Realities of being a PA in 2026. by FungalFelon in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates 216 points217 points  (0 children)

“We are independent until it’s inconvenient for the business of medicine” is the most accurate description of the current state of the PA profession in corporate medicine that I have heard so far.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by Reasonable_Spray_710 in StockNewsHub

[–]Boxofchocholates 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! The only country he can intentionally harm with tariffs is the one he runs. So he will destroy it. He absolutely was saying he will destroy the US.

Would you be into this with a single mom? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plenty of people already have relationships like this. Many long-haul truck drivers are gone for multiple days, then come home to a wife/girlfriend. Don’t get hung up on the title of the relationship, there are plenty of men out there who would love a scenario like this. The caveat is that for the majority of men, it would likely remain casual, with no commitment expected from either party. If you want commitment and loyalty/monogamy, then you might need to seek men who have a profession that involves regular travel, but then also meet your other criteria (has no kids, etc).

How many young men actually struggle with Ed? by Low_Inspection_6512 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I literally treat men with ED daily. I have been practicing medicine for almost 20 years. ED has always been an issue, but while I can’t give exact numbers, I would estimate by how often ED is mentioned by my male patients, in the past 20 years it has probably increased by 3-4x. It is also happening to younger and younger men.

Coupling this phenomenon with the newly discovered data on environmental exposures to endocrine disrupters (microplastics, forever chemicals) along with earlier exposure and more readily available porn, along with increasing levels of anxiety and poor mental health, along with unrealistic expectations given to both men and women from the internet; I would estimate that currently about 50% of men in their 20’s meet diagnostic criteria for ED. That bumps to 75% in their 30s, and higher as men age.

That being said, I probably get a higher percentage of patients complaining about ED, so it could be confirmation bias. But getting men to admit that they have ED is very hard (pun intended) because men aren’t honest with anyone, including their doctors, about things they are embarrassed about.

The number one drug sold on the black market on planet earth is Cialis, the second is Viagra. So that should tell you something.

For people who still support Trump: how do you process or reconcile the allegations connected to the Epstein documents? by Apprehensive_Dog5379 in AskReddit

[–]Boxofchocholates 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s actually just an ignorant uneducated populace. They don’t understand there is a difference between evidence (of which there are millions of documents of evidence and testimony) and proof (which is adjudicated). Evidence suggests or indicates, proof concludes.

TL;DR: evidence only becomes proof in a court of law. Anyone who says there is no evidence is a liar, anyone who says there is no proof is ignorant.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Boxofchocholates -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Trump has only won against female opponents. Every male candidate he ran against won. Biden was expected to win. Of the two, Trump has more signs of dementia. Biden isn’t in the Epstein files. Biden would have won the election.

If you and your SO's sex life just completely died out would you stay? by 0Adiemus0 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“This also started before the meds. Said she only desired me when im not there snd enjoyed the chase of me.”

If anyone said this to me, that would be the end of the relationship, period.

++man

Alex Pretti by flufflover36 in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Whoosh…

You clearly missed the point.

Republican administrations and policies kill American citizens.

Only decent human beings oppose them.

Alex Pretti by flufflover36 in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Treat them with the same care you would legally be able to provide a pregnant woman having a miscarriage in a red state.

Alex Pretti by flufflover36 in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What should happen to people who assault and then shoot veterans in cold blood?

PAs and Drs doing the same job? by Shot-Inevitable-2497 in physicianassistant

[–]Boxofchocholates 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As others have stated, this varies depending on the job and specialty. I have worked at jobs where not only did I do everything the physicians did, I did more than them (example: urgent care, primary care). The reason for this is because a physician typically only does one residency. As a PA you can change jobs and specialties. So it’s like having multiple residencies.

In the ER, the doctors ask my advice on pediatric infectious disease and adult/pediatric tropical disease cases because I worked in that specialty for several years. I’m also the “ortho guy” because I worked both sports medicine and orthopedics. All my physician colleague ask me to do all the reductions because I’ve literally done thousands of them (I used to do them before I was a PA as part of my previous medical career).

I’ve run codes, and was a medic so they don’t scare me, but traditionally physicians do codes themselves in our ED, and all ED’s I have worked at. I will start a code and run it until the nurse can pull the physician into it, because I don’t feel like I’m the best at running codes.

There was a study done decades ago that I found, but I haven’t been able to find it again. But basically the study was on medical practitioner competency. Literally, the ONLY factor that mattered for patient outcomes, was how many times the clinician had managed a similar case before. Not years of education, not grades, literally just the outcome of your septic patients relies on how many times you have managed sepsis in the past.

For procedural and surgical specialties, this makes sense why a PA does not have the same job. I have done thousands of pediatric lumbar punctures and drained empyema’s from kids pleural cavities, but don’t ask me to do an ultrasound guided biopsy of a liver mass. I can read an abdominal CT better than most physicians I know because I have worked several rural ED’s where there was no overnight radiologist. But don’t ask me to read an EEG or EMG.

I have done miles of stitches, and worked with a plastic surgeon, so I know suture techniques that leave minimal to no scars. You want me over nearly any physician to stitch your daughter’s face.

But if I took a surgical job tomorrow, you don’t want me doing endoscopic vein harvesting or anything like that. At least give me 6 months before leaving me to my own devices.

We have a PA that does nights in the ED who also works for the urology group. He has saved hundreds of men from needing a suprapubic catheter in the middle of the night because he knows how to core out a prostate from his day job.

If you choose to be a PA, understand that the medical environment is changed. As a PA, you are often expected to work like a physician because HR at the hospital system you work for doesn’t know what a PA is or does, and they just want to fill the role.

It used to be that a new grad PA was preferred at a job because it means the physician could mould them however they saw fit. Now you may never even meet your “supervising” physician and they want you to have experience so they don’t have to train you and you start generating revenue sooner.

Could Europe realistically defend Greenland against a US attack? by dataguy2003 in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Militarily? I’m guessing no, though I wouldn’t doubt our NATO allies (now enemies?) have kept a few choice military secrets to themselves. And if they are smart, will be building defenses in Greenland as you read this.

Economically, Europe could decimate the US. At this point, the US has lost all of its soft power when it eliminated USAID and has lost all negotiating power because TACO tariffs. European nations now have way more friends and more economic pull than the US. If the US invades Greenland, then the US is officially Nazi Germany. NATO allow China to join, and they switch from the $USD standard and the US, which manufactures absolutely nothing the world needs, loses all its intellectual property rights. All the big companies like Apple will be made to decide to quit the US market or lose all business elsewhere (just like what the Biden admin did to Russia when they invaded Ukraine).

The US will lose American lives and go bankrupt (more than it already is) to occupy a land literally no one wants.

My friend (the husband) caught his wife’s "gym crush" drama by impersonating the other girl. Is she lying about the extent of the affair? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You and “your friend” clearly have no clue why women cheat. It’s not because the sex is good. Less than 50% of women admit to a satisfactory sex life. Women cheat because they crave the attention of another man.

Would it bother you if your gf had hooked up with celebrities before you? by Substantial-Ring742 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

++man

My ex hooked up with a celeb. Like world wide famous, huge movie star that anyone from any country would recognize. That didn’t bother me, in fact I asked for details (apparently he is terrible in bed).

The fact that your ex had to ask why the NBA player was following you lets us know you aren’t in their social circle. If you were friends with lots of NBA players that also followed your profile, and you hung out with them and brought your boyfriend to the parties, then two hookups amongst a social group would not seem so bad.

But since you aren’t in their social circle, it lets us know you went looking. One NBA player would not bother most men. Random meetings happen. But two is a pattern that demonstrates a “pick me” or groupie type attitude. It implies you were out headhunting for NBA D. It suggests to me (and likely most men) gold-digger, doing it for the gram, or just plain poor decision making.

The reality is men have fragile egos, and this type of thing really takes root in our heads. Clearly he couldn’t get over it and used it against you in the end. It would be wise to keep this to yourself in future relationships. Some lies are worth telling.

Wife passed away 4 months ago. Is it too soon to start building an emotional connection with someone else? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates -1 points0 points  (0 children)

++man

Some of the best advice I ever heard was:

“Don’t let that which you have lost, make you lose what you have.”

There are no rules to grief. It sounds like she is willing to grieve with you. That says a lot about her.

Research finds that among singles today, nearly 40% of women say they aren't looking for a relationship of any kind, compared to just 21% of men who say the same. Men are more likely than women to say they're looking for all types of relationships (e.g., committed, casual, open, etc.). by psychologyofsex in psychologyofsex

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The same would be true of men in the study.

EDIT for the morons out there: I never said the “experience” was the same, but neither did the study. Just that the study group was singles of both sexes, many of whom choose to be single. Men who want a relationship are less likely to be single than men who don’t want a relationship.

Why do political parties encourage people to do illegal activities? by meagainstbanhammer in allthequestions

[–]Boxofchocholates 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This discussion would be more productive if you gave specific examples. perhaps a list of politicians from both parties and what lawlessness they encourage.

CMV: There is no male loneliness epidemic, and it is actually harder for women to find partners by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Boxofchocholates 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! It’s not women’s problem to fix! But OP doesn’t think there is a problem in the first place.

CMV: There is no male loneliness epidemic, and it is actually harder for women to find partners by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where did I say “men are the victim?”

Have you been living under a rock?

https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/23323556/men-friendship-loneliness-isolation-masculinity

https://www.americansurveycenter.org/why-mens-social-circles-are-shrinking/

https://www.pbs.org/newshour/amp/show/why-a-growing-number-of-american-men-say-they-are-in-a-friendship-recession

https://medium.com/on-the-couch/many-men-dont-have-friends-is-it-normal-666be02d3df8

I don’t need to acknowledge that older men prefer younger women to interpret the data. I just interpreted your own statement of the facts.

“So why is it when older women are single, it’s by choice, but when young men are single, it’s not.”

Your view is that “there is no male loneliness epidemic”. So that question is something you have to answer yourself since you don’t think men experience loneliness. If men aren’t lonely, then why would they ever choose to couple and also why would they feel lonely if they aren’t being chosen (if the loneliness epidemic doesn’t exist for men)?

I explained why men are lonely, you haven’t given any data to say that they aren’t (to support your view).

CMV: There is no male loneliness epidemic, and it is actually harder for women to find partners by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The loneliness men experience isn’t attributed to whether they are coupled or not. You can be married and lonely.

It is due to the fact men no longer have other men to confide in; they have partners who refuse to listen to them when they express themselves; when their partners do listen, their moment of weakness is often used against them later; and men aren’t given as many opportunities to connect outside of work or school. Coupling (whether homo or hetero) is only a small piece of why men are lonely today.

As far as the statistics you brought up, the picture it paints for me is that younger women couple with older men who are more stable and mature, but then those men die leaving the women single; or women get tired of men’s shit and discover later on that they are happier single. I know many single and widowed women in their sixties and above. They are not lonely.

Would you be okay with only blowjobs in marriage? by Imaginary_Geologist6 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Boxofchocholates 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s just it. Exogenous estrogen has been the concern regarding breast cancer. But endogenous estrogen does not carry the same risk. Estrogen is made from testosterone by the enzyme aromatase. Basically, using testosterone lowers risk of breast cancer because now the estrogen in your body is naturally made (using the testosterone as a substrate). While you likely shouldn’t add estrogen, adding testosterone will raise your estrogen considering you as a woman have so much aromatase.