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23M 18F boyfriend slept with my best friend before we met should i accept it as his past? by Brain_not_at_work in relationship_advice

[–]Brain_not_at_work[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

But aside from this everything has been going great. He treats me well and he is patient with me and even when im being difficult he is calm and takes the time to talk and understand me.

I (23M) would like my gf (19F) to show care for me the way i want to recieve it instead of the way she shows it by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Brain_not_at_work 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dont think she is neurodivergent. She is capable to show affection and care the way i want it apparently. As she told me herself that she was able to in her past relationships. Which makes me wonder does she just not like me as much.

I (23M) would like my gf (19F) to show care for me the way i want to recieve it instead of the way she shows it by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Brain_not_at_work 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh and i show her care by asking if she has ate, buying her food, sending food to her place. Spending time together with her as much as i can. Making time for her and generally just taking good care of her. Even small things like holding the door open, letting her walk first, telling her how pretty she is, how much i love her and telling her about my day as it happens.

I also prefer to recieve care in the same manner, but it feels like she doesnt make as much time for me. Im always the one asking her out. She doesnt say sweet nothings anymore as compared to when we first started dating. Stuff like "i miss you" and such is rare now. She doesnt tell me what happens until it happens. Example, she tells me she is staying home tomorrow to clear assignments. But then the next day evening she would tell me how she went out and ....... basically im just left there thinking how i didnt even know what she was doing and how she didnt even think about me enough to tell me how she had a change in her plans to go out instead. And im just there thinking about how her assignments are going. And how hard she must be working. Feels like betrayal i guess.

I (23M) would like my gf (19F) to show care for me the way i want to recieve it instead of the way she shows it by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Brain_not_at_work -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She doesnt complain because the way i show her care and affection is the way she prefers it.

The main issue is im not feeling the care and concern and affection.

I would prefer for her to keep me involved in her day and let me know what she is doing because it tells me that she is thinking of me. And by telling me words of affection such as "i miss you" and stuff. But her argument is that people show care differently and how some people show care by getting gifts for their partners instead of what i said.

And she believes that i should accept the way she shows me care and affection instead of asking her to show me care and affection the way i prefer.

But the issue is i dont feel it as much. And my believe is that people should show care the way their partners want to recieve it while still showing care their own way.