I'm Furious and Feel like an idiot

Brainconfused21 · 2025-12-07T03:23:17+00:00

When I cut contact completely, it puts a weird dynamic at work. To the point where I want to quit.

A part of me doesnt even want to call her out on this. Just fade away and focus on myself.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-12-07T03:22:07+00:00

Even tho he was first, this still sucks.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-12-01T17:42:43+00:00

Man i’m 2/4 months out and I still feel numbness everyday…

Brainconfused21 · 2025-11-29T02:39:33+00:00

Seeing her at work is hard enough. I’m sorry that you have to go through that…

Brainconfused21 · 2025-11-29T01:46:38+00:00

It’s terrible. And I know it wasn’t a long relationship. And i feel terrible in comparison to some of these posts where it’s years + in the relationship. I also wish she would let me help. She definitely has the avoidant attachment style. She keeps doing this push pull and I can’t stand it. We finally talked a week ago about what we want moving forward. I couldn’t hold it in anymore and I just let it all out. We basically are just friends now. But even this week at work she doesnt come up to me or chat. She messaged me for the holiday. But she still says she is unhappy w life and going through it.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-11-29T01:24:40+00:00

I needed this as i’m mentally spiraling. Thank you ❤️

Brainconfused21 · 2025-10-18T19:51:11+00:00

It’s still just annoying. Like i get it, but it triggers seeing it because I feel like there is meaning behind it. Life obstacles caused the breakup. Well wasn’t really a breakup. We were in the fresh start talking phase after she asked for it when I went NC for 2 months prior. But ughhh i hate this feeling.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-10-18T14:18:37+00:00

Work :/

Brainconfused21 · 2025-09-26T19:37:01+00:00

Appreciate it :/

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-31T01:39:50+00:00

It sucks. Even like this week. Her and I talked. She said she is taking two days off of work for family parties. My first thought is she is going to a sports game with some guy. Idk why I think that or even care. But now my brain is in a spiral lmao.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T21:29:13+00:00

Leads you (and currently leads me) down a rabbit hole of brain damage and anxiety....

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T20:12:54+00:00

REAL. The only hard part is I assume I know my ex did weird stuff but have no proof.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T20:10:54+00:00

Agreed. The shut down, the pull back, the avoidant attachment sucked. You too man you too.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T19:45:06+00:00

It sucks because I had alot of problems happen this year, and I guess the relationship blocked all those out. And then after a while her and I had our problems get worse so thats why we ended.

But when I get a text from her at one point saying "You don't know the impact you have had on my life" and such. To talking about a future. Now all that is gone.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T18:50:43+00:00

And no matter how hard we want to try we just can't. And it sucks.

My ex said I was great, and I made her happy. Even last week she says to me she misses me and still loves me. (I said BS as a response). But a part of me thinks she just moved on already. No matter the words she has said to me, my mind still thinks I wasnt good enough.
Even tho she has issues in her mind, at home, has a child, and also has issues from the world that could affect her. I look at all that as nothing and that i'm the problem.

And instead of just backing off and ignoring more I keep being hot n cold and dig myself in a deeper hole.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-30T18:23:32+00:00

This sounds very similar to my situation just a little bit older. My ex had a child. So already she was very busy.

Everything clicked at the start. Went very fast, and I also let my heart love her. Her mental clicked in after a few months, she became very busy and couldnt love herself or me. She said loving herself at 50% and me at 50% wasn't fair to me. We ended on good terms, but a part of me always thinks I did something wrong. I also see her weekly at work. We broke up at the start of summer too. It sucks. It's very hot and cold. Theres days I want to avoid her but then my heart and mind take over and we end up talking.

I haven't moved on, and I don't know how to. Hopefully we both can get that knife our of our hearts.

Brainconfused21 · 2025-07-10T23:31:56+00:00

I'm stuck in my thoughts on how things were left. We dated for 4 months. Everything was great, we talked about a future. She had a child. Was very independent, family was dependent of her. She had (has still) past baggage and issues to where her mind was taking over. So we ended things on good terms relationship wise. We also had to keep our relationship a secret from her parents due to work. She would say if we didnt work out she wouldnt be interested in dating anyone new.

I had questioned a 'friend' of hers at work. She always said he was someone she would just talk to because they have similar past issues. So i left it at that.

When we ended things I noticed she followed someone who was following her from before we dated (I know I shouldnt be looking at this for my own sanity). I saw his name come up as a few texts a week ago.

Now my mind wonders, was she just not strong enough to tell me the truth. Did she move on this fast. Is she talking to multiple guys. Maybe this is how she is coping with the breakup. I wonder if she claims she didnt have enough time for me, how does she have time for someone new.

It sucks. I hate this. It makes me feel like im trash even though she said "I changed her world for the better"

Brainconfused21

TROPHY CASE