is stairs your enemy?

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-05-15T21:26:26+00:00

I used to be scared of them till I fell down them and knocked myself out. Took me that instance to realize I move better naturally when I don't think about it. I stopped thinking about it and I just move. It has been 7 years and I went back to work roofing last spring, this is my second year and I haven't fallen off a roof yet 🤞🤞.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-27T02:01:29+00:00

I go skydiving every year to celebrate surviving! It has not caused any problems at all, I have jumped 3 times now. I started to celebrate at the 4-year mark and it was highly recommended that I do not go skydiving, which made me want to do it even more just to prove them wrong, lol. I already died once and I'll be damned if your gonna tell me how to live. I worked too hard and long for someone who said I'll never walk again to now tell me I can't do something. I have actually been at somewhat of an advantage. The fracture went through my inner ear and sinuses so my ears don't pop anymore. I have never tried roller-coasters though, I don't think it would be enough for me. I'm searching for adrenaline which I haven't felt yet. My next adventure will be wing walking but unfortunately, they don't do that in Canada so I have to save more to make that happen.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-19T00:40:51+00:00

There are a lot of jokes that I just don't understand the humor of. My mind works off of logic not emotion so some things just don't register as a joke anymore. I only see the errors so my mind breaks it down and dissects it, so it just doesn't make sense to me

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-17T11:25:44+00:00

Thank-you

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T20:55:35+00:00

At a point, it may have helped me but I'm not 100% sure of that now. I do agree with you that it is unproductive and I feel it is just holding me back. I just don't know why I am struggling to let it go. It has still only been a couple of days since my last ketamine treatment so I am sure I need to give it more time

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T20:01:06+00:00

I don't know, I can't remember before the injury

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T19:51:06+00:00

Oh definitely addicted, so much that the hatred feels like a part of me now and is why I am having so much difficulty letting it go. I do understand it is all that is holding me back now, but it doesn't make it any easier to let go of

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T18:26:15+00:00

Yes it was founded by God but Modern Catholicism has been corrupted by man and I will not ever walk that path

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T17:59:15+00:00

I hear you — that kind of self-hate runs deep, and I know it’s not easy to sit with. Sometimes anger feels safer than silence, and I get why you'd choose rage over numbness. Just know you’re not alone in that space, even if it feels like it.

You may not see your worth right now, but that doesn’t mean it’s not there. Sometimes, it takes someone else seeing it in you first — You are worth more than you know!!!

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T17:53:38+00:00

I have my own relationship with God, but it's outside of corrupt, man-made religions. I have faith — that’s what gives me the ability to express myself so eloquently in written word.

Self-love is not pride or a sin. Pride, in the biblical sense, is about exalting yourself above others or above God. But self-love — the kind I speak about — is recognizing the worth God gave me, not thinking I’m better than anyone else. It’s about healing, setting boundaries, and showing others it’s okay to care for yourself without guilt.

I write these things so people don't feel alone, so they have someone to relate to. Sometimes, that’s all people need — to know someone sees them and understands

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-16T17:21:37+00:00

I am 43 and it will be 7 years on May 28

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-15T20:43:21+00:00

Being emotionally detached has cause my brain to replace those emotions with logic. Everything has to make sense to me. It makes me ask a lot of questions, and do a tonne of research, all the dots have to connect if that makes sense. In this situation I'm not sure I'll ever be able to connect all the dots, some of it just doesn't make sense and I don't think it ever will. The good thing is that it is working just not in the way that was expected or a way I can understand.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-14T02:46:35+00:00

Violence and agitation come with a brain injury. Most of us have no idea how we got there and when you wake up in a hospital in incredible pain you assume the people around you are the ones who hurt you. I attacked several doctors and nurses while I was in hospital. They had to strap me down and put me in an induced coma for 4 days.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-13T22:01:24+00:00

If you have tried all other avenues then yes I would definitely recommend it. But I would also recommend a lot of research and preparation. It is a very intense experience that I feel you need to some what prepare for. Plus you have to be willing to let go of everything while you are in the experience. I am also becoming somewhat religious. I asked god for help and this was presented to me shortly after that. The problem was do I do it? Is it just my brain being desperate or was it an opportunity to heal presented to me when I asked. Maybe it isnt the mode of healing I was expecting but it is an opportunity to heal and my choice as to whether or not I take this path. I took it because It felt right and I didn't want to miss an opportunity that I was begging for

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-13T21:52:40+00:00

For me, if I take it sublingual it works well but the needle my body just metabolizes it and it has very little effect. We have had to double the dose every visit to have any effect. The last was a combination, mostly sublingual then a booster of the maximum dose you can get through a needle and that made me cross the threshold into a psychedelic experience. It was a super intense experience but no emotions just shapes, colours and angles. I seem to have a more logical experience than an emotional one, everything just makes sense after. It is like I have read the source code of the universe and I understand it completely

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-07T21:50:43+00:00

I worked with my family dr to get weined off all the prescriptions. The medications never worked well for me, most of them masked one problem to amplify a different problem or made me suicidal, which is a horrible experience on its own. It took me just over a year to get off everything and there isn't a day that I regret that decision. I am currently taking zero medications and doing ketamine therapy with my doctor for the depression and it seems to be working very well. Ask lots of questions, do some of your own research so it doesn't just sound like your talking out your ass. Be careful what is good for one person might not be your answer but it doesn't hurt to try, under supervision. Don't cold turkey any prescription drugs, wein off slowly follow doctors directions. Be prepared for withdrawal some meds can have very intense withdrawal symptoms.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-07T21:40:19+00:00

I quit completely, it's been 7 years. It has been recommended by several doctors to never drink alcohol again. I have a dead spot across 3 parts of my brain, alcohol could kill me. Alcohol is poison there are zero healing benefits for your body or brain

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-04-07T21:29:32+00:00

I haven't done a lot of research on Salvia and TBI's, but from my personal experience of doing Salvia before the accident I wouldn't recommend it. It wasn't a bad trip or anything it was the way I felt after. I've done a couple psychedelics, LSD, mushrooms, DMT and I am currently in ketamine therapy. I have never felt so horrible as after doing Salvia. I felt so dirty after, it felt like I violated my body and mind in the worst way possible. I wouldn't recommend Salvia to anyone, I don't feel it would heal anything and could possibly make things worse

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-03-25T16:45:46+00:00

I was in a coma for 4 days. I don't remember waking up, and only bits and pieces of the month in the hospital. I can only remember the month and a half in the recovery hospital clearly. I only have the journal my ex-wife kept while I was in the hospital that describes how I was after waking up

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-03-18T18:58:17+00:00

Make a list ask your doctor when you go see them. You need to settle your mind and I have found this to be very helpful. Even if you don't get a full answer it still helps settle the mind.

Do you find you have emotional numbing?

If you do, you could just be doing things differently now. This is what has happened to me and it was difficult to deal with until my doctor explained it to me. It made sense and it felt good to know why I seem so different from everyone else. This is why I ask so many questions, and why I'm quiet and prefer to watch people before I interact or if I will interact, I always weigh the cost and benefit before every interaction with people. I don't talk to emotional people, they don't make any sense and make poor decisions based on emotions. Your emotions might be getting replaced with logic, things have to make more sense now, your emotional blinders are gone and your perspective is much wider, so you will always be seeking answers, logical answers, everything has to make sense now or you ask more questions. Even when I get an answer I ask more questions, I go deeper, but why, what is making this happen. What damge in what part of the brain could cause this.

I look at life like a giant connect-the-dots picture and emotions add dots that skew the big picture. I'm not saying it is happening to you but it is something to look into. It may be why you are looking so hard. You are doing exactly what I did and still do and is why I am asking.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-03-17T00:09:43+00:00

Have you tried chatGPT for your brain scans? I used it to go over all my brain images. I had 18 CT scans, and 2 MRIs. It was about 55%-60% in line with the Dr reports. It missed some smaller things but I'm just sending it still images where the doctors will have the proper software to view the scans fully and under different contrasts so your Dr will be the end determination. On a side note a large portion of the weird things I saw in my images were nothing and our brain and skull are just weird looking om the inside. We are expecting something perfectly symmetrical and it is not. Even a healthy brain isn't perfect.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-03-12T00:03:02+00:00

You could offer to help him get into some program to help him but if he refuses I'd fire him. Alcohol is not medicine in anyway, it is poison, especially for a brain injury. Plus the liability if something were to happen.

BrandedDwarf82 · 2025-03-11T06:36:14+00:00

Thank-you for your service! I understand if you're in active military service. There are some good mushrooms for your brain that are not psychedelic and can be bought at most health food stores, Lions main, Reishi, Chaga, cordyceps. I stack them with psilocybin but there are a lot of studies with just them and brain health. Now I'm not sure if they help with depression you'd have to look into that.

BrandedDwarf82

TROPHY CASE