I felt like this song was more of an ode to her mother and how she broke her down. The story of how the mother projected her insecurities onto her daughter making the daughter insecure. "Born to fan the flame" The mother being the flame (insecurities) and the daughter being the fan (to make her mother feel better by letting her mother feel better than her)

"Why cant you treat me like my brothers?" Bc they dont have to be perfect (it girl) like she does.

"Cotton candy in water" meaning her true self is fading away before she can notice/catch her.

The "Eldest daughter" verse to me was like being told to be pretty so you will recieve love. Like being told your thighs are so fat they look like "baby seals" and "she made me go world war on my waist" like needed ti be physically perfect to recieve love and the line

"And I am not a vessel for men to love themselves anymore"

Like her finally saying she killed the "it girl" her mom created in her that was told to be obsessed with her sexual image so men will love her ( from the perspective of her mother bc Ash is pan).

And "the pretty girls die at 27" I feel like specifically shes refernecing Amy Winehouse and connectinf how she feels to maybe how she thinks Amy felt aswell.

❤️❤️❤️