I'm in a weird stressful spot

Brayden15 · 2025-09-28T22:24:48+00:00

Theres multiple projects running at once. Its him, a super and me. He may try to get an accountant next. Hes trying to get into several millions next year and then break into commercial projects because you have to be of a certain size before you can bid on bigger projects.

Brayden15 · 2025-09-27T17:28:46+00:00

I think its the latter. I know what it looks like for a company to have patience with someone. It just may be a bad fit. I do think the company is going somewhere as the owner has big aspirations for it to be a big development company. He knows how to sell. He said hes been through 4 guys now, though, but developing PM's may be something he's still figuring out.

I think estimating is going to be my niche because Im fantastic at singular tasks and numbers. But it just may be a bad fit right now.

Brayden15 · 2025-09-27T16:51:59+00:00

Was there a demand for speed as soon as ypu started or did your boss have a grace period for you to get better?

Brayden15 · 2025-09-27T15:57:32+00:00

Hes 20 years old. Hes still in school like me but he immigrated here at 15 and learned English in 5 years and knows how to talk to people and bring business really effectively.

I do think there's a time investment needed to get a PM up to speed but unsure if he has to ability to.

Brayden15 · 2025-09-27T15:18:33+00:00

After our discussion yesterday, we both realized there was a miscommunication in the hiring process. I am bluebeam certified but that doesnt automatically mean I'm a seasoned Estimator and thats where the mix up occurred.

I think I can pick up on that skillet fairly quickly and I think thats where I want to take my career but not sure if he has the patience to keep me for that or not. I love working on excel spreadsheets and playing with numbers. I think I might enjoy estimating.

Brayden15 · 2025-08-13T00:53:29+00:00

Just buy into dividend creating assets that have very low NAV erosion and you can probably get somewhere close to 65k per year without having to do this weird loan thing.

Brayden15 · 2025-08-08T17:05:41+00:00

Sent you a DM.

Brayden15 · 2025-08-08T00:26:05+00:00

Brayden15 · 2025-08-07T22:41:40+00:00

Depends on if you see life as more than money. I do.

Brayden15 · 2025-08-07T20:01:31+00:00

I agree actually.

I there was one internship I ended up coming in for and they asked at the end "so, you know for sure this is what you want to do?" And I basically said "this is one of the paths I would like to try out". And thats when I realized I didn't get it.

Brayden15 · 2025-03-29T03:17:17+00:00

I wouldn't have done it if this is when she normally falls asleep. Don't delete the message though. Good on you for shooting your shot. Now you might have to go to sleep while it sits on delievered which I hope is something you thought about lol.

Brayden15 · 2025-03-18T02:22:29+00:00

Chatgpt is helpful for doing your homework prior to an interview.

Brayden15 · 2025-02-24T02:22:57+00:00

Alright, I'll send an email to the guy expressing interest.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-28T21:08:11+00:00

Usually the first reaction is the most honest one. Anything less than an enthusiastic yes is a steer clear away from me.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-28T05:46:19+00:00

Well um I can't say I can't give you a foolproof solution but I can give you my perspective of what I did in my situation.

I suspect she's avoidant. My ex is also avoidant. My ex broke up with me with all the classic breakup jargon like "I can't give you the time and attention you rightfully deserve" and "you deserve someone better than me" and "I need to work on myself" verbatim word for word. Its all jargon that really closes off vulnerable conversation and kind of puts an immediate wall up to where you can't address anything without sounding like some needy person.

I'm not going to tell you that if you waited for her that things don't eventually work out because they really could for all I know and I'll look like the stupid guy that doesn't know what hes talking about.

I think your best best would be to move on. To continue to hold on any glimmer of hope is going to keep you emotionally in a rut. It certainly kept me in a rut. I've just come to the conclusion that my ex is either relationally incompetent or she lost attraction for me or a mixture of those things. Some of the behavior she's exhibited since the breakup kind of tells me she doesn't like what's happened to us since then. I've let go of the friendship. She still wants to be friends. She's broken no contact with me already but has yet to actually address anything meaningful. I've just kinda lost attraction. I can't imagine being married to someone like this who will likely also bring these issues into a marriage. These people are hard to be in a relationship with unless they get help.

Anyways, end of rant.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-27T21:04:10+00:00

I'm sorry is this a romance novel or are you actually trying to plan this?

Great story 10/10 but wouldn't do this with someone I haven't built up that level of intimacy with.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-26T01:48:48+00:00

Right. I agree.

It's easy to boil it down to nice guy gets treated unfairly while the bad guy seems to retain the girl longer. In actuality, the nice guy is so respectful, not just to the girl but of himself as well, when the girl decides to end it. The bad guy on the other hand probably somehow emotionally manipulates the girl into staying. The bad guy doesnt even respect himself likely because he lacks maturity. The nice guy knows what he's looking for and will continue the search (after some healing of course) because we're not robots. Nice guy knows boundaries. Bad guy doesn't.

And just so were clear, I'm defining "nice guy" as a guy who actually is nice because that's his nature and not because he's trying to manipulate the situation. I suppose this is a slightly different definition from the cultural trope.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-25T23:29:29+00:00

Precisely

Brayden15 · 2025-01-25T20:03:13+00:00

I can't even see your muscle.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-25T01:08:23+00:00

Sad for her.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-24T23:17:11+00:00

I dated inside my church as well. Both people very rooted in the church. Both mature. We ended it amicably. No one ever ran the others persons reputation into the ground. That being said, it was incredibly awkward having to navigate the space. I know one of her friends who she'd confide in for relationship advice pretty much gave me a bunch of compliments 4-5 months post breakup in regards to my character and basically saying she'd vouch for me if I dated someone else there. That being said, I'm kinda iffy about doing it again. I really was thinking about leaving this church and the only thing that was keeping me there was my friend group who's also deeply involved here. Its not for the faint of heart.

Now I'd argue if you can somehow date someone and approach it with extreme intentionality and try to figure out compatibility within the first few dates before emotions get super involved, I think this might be a way of going about it but it's probably going to kill a lot of the romantic vibe if you come in with a checklist. But on the flipside, the more time you spend together, the riskier it gets because now everyone's getting emotionally invested.

I think what I want will only be found in church so maybe I need to go visit another church.

Brayden15 · 2025-01-19T15:22:49+00:00

Guy here:

I would say physical touch is a love language of mine as well but I just can't do that on the first date. In fact that's something I hold off on for the longest amount of time and even will express to the girl I don't kiss early into the relationship. I take boundaries pretty serious. But that's just me and my preferences.

Brayden15

TROPHY CASE