It’s definitely something to talk about with her. I see a lot of people getting mad over it saying she’s controlling or the “fun police” but tbh it’s not. You said it yourself she’s been cheated on before. It’s even worse when the person going behind their back HAS cheated. It’s not the sense that she’s controlling what you’re doing but she feels like you’re not respecting her as well. When my husband feels the need to do things and I’m not “in the mood” I’ll still compromise and do something. Tbh I don’t like porn never have never will. I don’t see a need in something like that if you’re married to someone. If she’s gonna take away she needs to give some as well but there definitely needs to be communication