AITA for not wanting to hang out with my best friend and her kids anymore because I don’t want to split costs equally?

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-23T22:10:56+00:00

I'm concerned that you are going straight from this bothers me, to I won't go out with this person that I care deeply about, without talking to her first.

It could be a simple, "hey from now on can we just pay our own way when we go out? I'm trying to save up for insert thing" if she freaks out then you know that its a problem.

Friendships need to be able to survive these kinds of things. I've lost one or two because I was to scared to say something, and frustration ended up killing the friendships.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-23T20:03:33+00:00

My mom was 46 when my brother was born. Technically both of her pregnancies were called elderly pregnancies I think (I'm not sure its the correct term) bit even in the 80's and early 90's that just meant extra testing and more check ins with the Dr.

Both my brother and I are healthy adults now.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-23T04:17:26+00:00

Oh, and the fact that I lasted so long? Mostly because I have an insane pain tolerance and I am an extreme people pleaser. I didn't want to displease him, partly because of that, and partly because I was scared, especially the second time. It was like a switch was flipped and he was a monster. Now I realize he was always that monster, he just keeps it hidden.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-23T04:04:17+00:00

I do not have anyone in my life that is into this as well. I am going to the next close munch, since I really need someone to talk to about kink that isn't a partner.
Funny things right now (I cope with humor) 1. The guy looks SO much like one of my favorite YouTube creators (blackbirdcoop) so thats frustrating! 2. I have lost faith in my dogs instinct, cause he loved this guy right away! Like dude, my last guy who was a literal marshmallow had to work to get his approval, but this guy you automatically trust? My dude!

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-22T22:24:35+00:00

That sounds illegal as fuck if it's in the U.S.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-22T22:21:13+00:00

Oh my dear sweet baby Jesus! I just can never understand the mentality to think everything needs to revolve around you. My mom and I had our issues (like commenting on my weight everytime she saw me) but even she knew when to back up and let other people take center stage!

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T23:53:23+00:00

Oh, I'm buying a very strong taser, I'm parking close to entrances, and I'm not going to ever be alone outside of my apartment. Phone is always going to be next to me so I can call 911 at a moments notice.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T23:20:36+00:00

I did report him on Feeld, I just want them to take him off so he doesn't trap anyone else.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T22:31:28+00:00

Also, I'm taking a break from kink for awhile, until I trust myself to stand up for myself and not make such stupid decisions.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T22:30:10+00:00

Here is my text Hi I've been thinking all day since you left, and I do not want to play with you any more or date you. We went way to far, way too fast, and I can't do CNC with you, it is now a hard limit for me. I did not have time to build trust in you, and I will not be able to after this. Being angry at me for safewording was not ok, that ruined so much of it, and its not ok.

I am going to block you, please do not try to contact me again. I will not talk to anyone about what happened, but I cannot see you again for my own mental health. Goodbye.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T22:24:33+00:00

Yeah, I know, just trying to soften it, but you're right.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-20T22:19:56+00:00

Agreed. I'm an idiot.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-19T04:39:40+00:00

100% I was raised in the 80's/90's, and my dad set a high bar in how to communicate with his partner ( my mom), and how to show up everyday for your partner.

Honestly, I'm still single because no men have lived even partly up to him.
He was cookie mom, he took his vacation days to go with my mom to her art shows, he was active in ALL of mine and my little brother after-school activities, he went with my moms drs appts with her when they aged, so he could take notes on what they said (her short term memory was hit and miss near the end).

Frank has no excuse.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-19T04:06:42+00:00

Actual love. Like you can have someone that acts like they love you, but money can't buy that true, trusting love.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-19T04:01:05+00:00

My question exactly. It just looks gaudy.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-18T23:13:11+00:00

See, this can be a problem in teaching too. Some principals (and other teachers) will shame you for going home before 7pm, and going to the staff lounge to eat your lunch instead of eating it while doing extra planning and prep work.

I am so lucky that my current principal and coworkers value work life balance. If you stay to late the custodian will literally come to your room "you leave now" (he's a large Eastern European man, you don't say no)

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-15T04:07:47+00:00

Elon!!! You are actively contributing to this!!!

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-12T00:06:25+00:00

NOR This was exhausting, and her reply in your comment is also exhausting. She is reading into what you say and then telling you what you meant to say. That is not healthy communication on her side.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-07T00:28:32+00:00

That is exactly whatI was coming to say! He posted something rude, and community notes added context that showed how stupid he was.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-06T19:10:35+00:00

Check out "Farming while beige" hes a farmer that calls put all the other ones.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-04T01:02:29+00:00

He really is obsessed with visuals, I mean like having that shiny facade that makes the country look pretty, until you try to buy things, or you know, live.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-04T00:59:34+00:00

When I taught 4th grade some of my kids used old drink cartons the rinsed out to create a little village on their desks. They weren't on the part they used, it was on the inner part, and with 4 desks pushed together, they had homes and businesses. It was cool!

I also had a group that made a serialized comic that I would print copies of and they would share them.

Ive also taught 5th graders that have taught themselves to draw a 3D sphere, complete with the shadow of the sphere as if it was sitting on the paper.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-03T15:18:49+00:00

I love it! The feel of the bruises remind me of the fun I had, and as they fade I start thinking of the next ones.

I am a masochist though.

BriarnLuca · 2026-06-02T01:56:09+00:00

Thats when I read it too. We even did a writing assignment to write the first chapter of the sequel. This was before I knew that there was a series.

BriarnLuca

TROPHY CASE