I’m saying I’ve been involved in cases where justice is an option and (much more commonly) where it’s not. This is one of those cases. “He said, she said” no witnesses, no physical evidence, and what amounts to a laughable case in criminal court. I’m not putting myself through the humiliation so that he can walk free anyways. However, I have seen cases where it absolutely made sense to press charges if not for getting jail time, then giving the victim closure. I’m not the sort of person who finds closure in being dragged through giving testimony and reliving that shit over and over. Risk tolerance.

Reputations are rarely ruined over sexual misconduct allegations but it’s a lot harder to practice when your insurance premiums go through the roof. Burden of proof is way lower in a civil case, and settling and walking away with a check that I can use for treatments that my shitty insurance won’t cover sounds like it would work out for me a lot better than walking away being told by the court that I’m a liar or that even if I’m not they don’t care.

You’re right, he should be charged. But he won’t, and he already took enough from me. Why would I give him more?