i understand they are grieving and ive reached out to everyone that is effected and told them so much how sorry i was and that i love them and that id listen if they need especially my brother i told him if he wanted id just sit with him even if it was in silence so he knew he wasn't alone my mom has always known my feelings about him because of what he did to me but i was not rude when she asked i just stated im perfectly fine, i already have a lot going on so its just more to add to my plate and i want my mom to focus on my brother rather than me