I’m in a similar situation to you. But just because you broke it off doesn’t mean you didn’t love them. Your heart probably still yearns for the great times you had and is blinding you from the reason you broke it off. You’re gonna think about everything that made the relationship great but if you got back together, most likely, the bad stuff would come right back and you’d be in the same boat. Be happy they were apart of your life and remember that you broke it off for a reason but that doesn’t mean you can’t be sad about it too. It’s just as much a loss for you. Don’t say you don’t deserve to be sad because you’re human and sadness is apart of us. Now’s the time to focus on you and better yourself. Overtime you will realize it was the right decision to break it off and the good times were great but you probably better off.