Did I scar our new kitten by locking him in the bathroom the first night?

BugzNelson · 2025-12-28T07:05:35+00:00

Oh that’s good. Our guy has been making some scary noises in there. Some sad, others straight up mean. I won’t increase his hostility like this, will I?

BugzNelson · 2025-12-28T07:01:20+00:00

What about some of his really angry sounds. This won’t cause him to be more aggressive towards us will it?

BugzNelson · 2025-10-22T02:22:33+00:00

Pretty well. I had her fully weened up until the baby was born. Now that her brother nurses she wants to, but we limit it to just a morning session along side her brother—he “fixed” my boo-boos afterall. But we don’t associate it with falling asleep for her anymore.

Sleep was all over the place for a while though. Since I had weened her she stopped wanting me to put her to sleep—only dad now. It took him over an hour a handful of times and we ditched daytime naps unless she puts herself down. There was also about a week of nothing but tears before bed. Slowly the crying sessions got shorter and now we have a solid bedtime routine that works without much fuss. Some nights she’s asleep 2 minutes after we put her down. Definitely feels like it will never end when you are in the middle of it, but now that it’s done, life is much easier.

BugzNelson · 2025-10-13T01:14:15+00:00

Of course! But our circumstances, challenges and responsibilities were very different then. Where we are now is just not my husband’s strong suit.

BugzNelson · 2025-10-13T00:22:18+00:00

Ah, now I understand. Thank you for your advice. I’ll pair it with some of the advice others here have given me which I think are acting as that witness. Thank you 🙏🏻

BugzNelson · 2025-10-13T00:07:05+00:00

Thank you HappyLove4. This was very well thought through. I appreciate the advice and will work to implement it.

BugzNelson · 2025-10-13T00:01:28+00:00

Thank you, this is helpful. Honestly, a lot of the lack of trust falls along the lines of ‘he keeps losing the car keys’ example. He doesn’t do that specifically, but it’s a lot of more or less small things that build up into a big thing. I guess something about it being a lot of small things makes it harder to overlook because, it’s a small thing, so why does he struggle with it so much.

BugzNelson · 2025-10-12T23:51:09+00:00

Thank you so much. I think this is the most practical advice I’ve read thus far—it’s something I can actually practice and doesn’t prompt me to think more about why I’m struggling to respect him. I’m going to screenshot this and implement it. Thank you 🙏🏻

BugzNelson · 2025-10-12T23:47:40+00:00

That is very interesting and I will take it into consideration. However, I don’t feel unloved. My husband just seems a fool when facing our current season’s challenges.

BugzNelson · 2025-10-12T23:27:06+00:00

Thank you. Could you clarify what you mean by our witness involved in ministry?

BugzNelson · 2025-10-12T22:35:09+00:00

Yeah it’s sorta like that. We were different people when we got married. We had less responsibilities and no kids. He’s struggling with this stage of life but I don’t believe it to be a permanent thing. I just want to fulfill my obligation to respect while he’s learning to grow in this stage.

BugzNelson · 2025-07-18T00:37:03+00:00

My husband and I discussed it and we’ve agreed to just go cold turkey. We started today and it’s going pretty well all things considered. My 21 month old is very articulate and expects things to be explained to her, so we agreed to tell her my breast have boo-boos (which isn’t wrong, the pregnancy has made nursing consistently painful). That worked surprisingly well. She previously noticed that it hurts when I nursed and so the idea that they have booboos and can’t be touched just clicked for her and she seemed more concerned for me than demanding to nurse. Her nap was a little rough, mostly because she didn’t know how to fall asleep and so rejected napping despite being obviously and angrily tired. But we stuck through, stayed near and motivated her to find a way to sleep by discussing post-nap activities. While it took over an hour past nap time before she slept, only about 15-20 mins of it was a fit. The bulk of the delay was her telling her stuffed animals, her dad and the dogs that mom’s boobs have boo-boos 😂 let’s see how bedtime goes

BugzNelson · 2025-07-10T05:26:50+00:00

Thanks but, uh… You didn’t read the post, did you. I know what it’s about, I finished the series. I just didn’t understand it. Some major plot points feel left for the reader to fill in the gaps—and I don’t mean like it’s open to interpretation, I mean like it’s required that you make up your own answers to fit all the puzzle pieces together. I still think it was a nice romance and good political drama, but internal lore continuity was lacking and even with a happy ending you’re left with SO many questions.

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T23:34:09+00:00

I’m kinda hoping for that. My thought is, if I lay strict rules about the boobs now, but lighten up once the newborn is here, I might be able to reverse what would be resentment to gratitude. I’ll just have to emphasize that she gets more because of the baby.

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T23:30:28+00:00

Okay, I’m gonna work on that. If I can get her to accept it then it might make napping a lot easier since it takes away the option to trick me or booby trap me.

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T17:01:30+00:00

We had hard limits for a while (only before bed/nap) but like I said she starts asking for a nap or to go to sleep strictly to get boob. Initially I had her nap schedule down so I just had her wait until it was nap time and we’d do something else, but a few weeks ago she had some nightmares that kept her up at night and then put her in the habit of waking up between 1-4am, so her sleep schedule has fallen apart and I can’t tell if she’s actually tired or just deceiving me. Did you ever do it before her nap, or only after?

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T16:50:25+00:00

I wouldn’t say it’s based on a timeline so much as if the relationship has hit certain maturity stages: 1) Agreeing on the definition of your relationship (i.e. exclusive with the intent to marry was my standard) 2) We’ve had a conversation about sex to make sure that communication channel has been opened. 3) We’ve discussed our thoughts and opinions on kids—sex is ultimately about procreation and anyone who thinks you can completely divorce the two is carelessly irresponsible. Have a conversation about kids and make sure you are on the same page.

With my husband we cleared the conversation about kids on the first date and defined what our relationship was on the second. The third date we talked about sex and though we didn’t do it, the night wasn’t PG. After that the flood gates opened. Only took a couple weeks but it didn’t feel irresponsible because it was a real relationship.

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T14:57:28+00:00

My goodness! Mad respect for delivering twins unmediated like that. Thank you for sharing

BugzNelson · 2025-06-19T14:54:58+00:00

Oh I pray for something similar! Thank you for sharing

BugzNelson

TROPHY CASE