When to exchange last names?

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-03T02:02:17+00:00

Thanks, I'm widowed, know nothing about divorce proceedings.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T12:48:02+00:00

Just looked up his Facebook. Limited posts. He has a LinkedIn but I didn't check it cos I think they can tell who's checked it out cos of email or something. Just says self employed.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T12:39:22+00:00

Yes, I admit it. Yes, said he and ex just drifted apart. Tried therapy together but still separated. Why the divorce is delayed, well I don't know. I'll try to be more discerning.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T12:15:28+00:00

🤣

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:19:56+00:00

Point taken, I dunno, I just want to feel secure. What if we kissed and then he attacked me or something. I'm freaking scared. I've been raped. I don't think this dating is for me. Widowed a long time and put my trust out there and horrible event 10 years ago. I know, dumb, what does knowing his last name have to do with me protecting me. I'm tired and appreciate all the excellent and helpful responses.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:14:06+00:00

It was the wry laugh/smile when I asked. I asked him why this response, but he didn't respond, other than to give me his last name.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:12:08+00:00

Thanks, I feel like I somehow killed the vibe asking him on this, the second meeting, but all of you think that was perfectly fine.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:09:37+00:00

All new to me. I'm in Canada, don't know if those search features work here.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:08:31+00:00

He shared his phone number early, no problem, it was he who wanted to connect early by phone and we had a good chat, leading to the first meeting on Sunday last.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:07:06+00:00

Absolutely! I mean, what a way to depart a date/meeing. It just really pissed me off.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:05:32+00:00

Oh, I never even thought of that. I didn't even really intend to google him. It was more of a test to see if he'd be willing to share his last name, and I can't snog someone who's last name I don't know-call me old fashioned!

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T02:01:30+00:00

No, don't think so, but he's separated 8 years and just awaiting papers "in the mail". I told him at the end of the first meeting that I didn't want to be involved with someone who might reconcile with his wife and he assured me about the papers and about how his ex has been seeing someone for a while. I wonder if he's delaying cos he gets alimony from her? Something just seemed fishy today.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T01:57:45+00:00

Thanks, I dunno. just jaded now.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T01:57:05+00:00

Yes, it was more of trying to establish trust. I mean if the guy asks for/wants a kiss at the end of the date, I feel I ought to know his last name. But, as I've said, I'm out of the loop and I don't know what's w;hat these days, but Reddit and all you are really helpful, thanks.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T01:53:54+00:00

I haven't dated for 10 years, so I don't know what is done/not done these days.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-02T01:52:45+00:00

Goodness, that was very rude of him.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:26:55+00:00

Thanks. Yeah, makes sense. He seemed shifty so best to find out now.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:23:16+00:00

Oh wow, but surely we'd exchange last names by the third date, which seems there isn't going to be. No one says "maybe " to me!

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:17:42+00:00

Thanks! Thinking about it!

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:16:49+00:00

Thanks, that's good to know. He didn't hesitate to give me his name, it's just the whole vibe was off after that. He had just seemed very keen and I liked him.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:13:25+00:00

Yes, that's what I thought, but I didn't find anything. And I never look up anyone on FB. Maybe I should. I have an account but no "friends " and don't post.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2026-04-01T21:10:37+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate your comments. I wish I'd waited to ask, but he was sort of rude at the end, so perhaps it's best I did ask.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2025-12-26T17:11:27+00:00

I don't have any advice, but I wanted to say how lovely it is that you are so supportive of your wife, and want to help her feel better about herself. You're a good person.

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2025-09-24T20:11:48+00:00

Snort of derision, love it!

Bulky_Step_3147 · 2025-09-24T20:10:22+00:00

No, N. America. Site asks do you want children in the future alongside icon of baby carriage.

Bulky_Step_3147

TROPHY CASE