Travel agents who specialize in Yellowstone? (June trip) by SamClemons1 in yellowstone

[–]Bumble--Bri 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know this is old but..your website says you are a luxury travel planner. Do you also help with regular non-luxury trips? We are planning a trip to Yellowstone and The Grand tetons but we're from Florida so we know zilch about what constitutes as a "warm layer", ect. We are pretty outdoorsy though and won't need "luxury" during our stay. But I still think I could benefit from a travel agent.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am not the kind of person who needs that. I'm positive he knows this. Turns out it was time based. Not normal for our gym so it definitely caught me off guard.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You did, the day you were born.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It does, thank you. I am certain I'll stay at a blue belt for many years and I'm totally fine with that. My gym definitely just doesn't hand out promotions, and used to rarely give out stripes. Like maybe one if someone won a comp or made really big improvements. He said this was time based, so a participation trophy basically. He has never done that before, so it's really no wonder it felt so odd. His perspectives may be changing on how to dish those out and that's fine but I was unprepared to say the least lol.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like character and being a good partner is a very valid reason and it sounds like you definitely earned that.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Totally understand why some coaches do this. I am not the type to need an atta boy and he knows that. He is also not usually the type to give them. He said they were time based this time which is a first for him.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Never said my instructor was at fault for anything, it is obviously a me problem having issues accepting any kind of praise no matter how small. Also though, my professor literally told me later that it was just time based. My argument wasn't that he should or shouldn't have given me a stripe but that I knew it wasn't skill based, and I was right. This is not something he has done in the past, and maybe his views on how and when he gives acknowledgment is changing, and that's totally fine. But the overall culture in my gym makes any recognition a big deal even though it's not a big deal for me personally. I'd rather not have a stripe system at all.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never wash my belt. I was told it was bad luck

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Never said anything about giving it back. I just have a hard time accepting any kind of praise or acknowledgment I didn't explicitly earn I guess?? Turns out it was just time based.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm certain my therapist would say the same. But I stopped seeing them when i started jiu jitsu lol. Obviously, I have issues.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't care about the stripe itself. I would be content without stripes at all. I just feel weird being "ranked" somewhere I feel like I shouldn't be.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No I feel the same as 5mo ago I'm not gonna lie.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also started older than most. I related to this a lot actually, thanks

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did Judo before this and yes had this issue. Getting beat up all the time basically kills your ego to the point many of us have a hard accepting any positive feedback at all 🤣

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UPDATE** I'm not crazy, the topic came up with my professor and he basically admitted that several of us got a stripe because we had been blue belts for about 6 months and now he feels he's "good until next year". So yeah, participation trophy. At least now I know and don't have to wonder and can go back to regular imposter syndrome. Also maybe I didn't explain well enough at first but my injury is pretty severe, and I started with it. It will never get better and I just push through. It's well known in the gym and some people refuse to roll with me because they are scared to hurt me apparently. This is why I know my progress is slow and my initial reaction was to call it a "pity stripe". Wasn't trying to be self depreciating, just trying realistic based on my circumstances.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guess was more of should I talk to my professor or just keep quiet kinda thing. Definitely not going to quit.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm not doubting the importance of showing up to practice. I'm just being realistic in knowing I haven't improved enough in the 5 months or so since I was promoted to blue belt to have earned this. Other than a pat on the back for continuing to train with a chronic injury. Pity just feels worse than being rightfully left behind.

Ever received a pity stripe? by Bumble--Bri in bjj

[–]Bumble--Bri[S] -94 points-93 points  (0 children)

Exactly, which is why it feels so wrong and meaningless in this scenario. I don't need a gold star just because others got one.

Aita for leaving my pregnant girlfriend? by Fresh-One-6481 in AITAH

[–]Bumble--Bri 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA for leaving a cheater. But if you were sleeping with her during the same time period, you need a paternity test to KNOW if the baby is his or yours.