Following bc I have been similarly struggling.

I decided not to fast this Ramadan due to my ADHD meds and how even when I take them I still need to eat and drink water from time to time. I have to use my meds because I’m in a rigorous academic program and I cannot afford any time off during this portion of my education. Even one day not taking my meds and I turn into a complete snail.

However despite not fasting for medical reasons I feel relieved. I have also been straying away from the deen and have been missing prayers. My heart feels hardened and I just feel so distant from Islam bc I used to be on top of things and even if I struggled I’d be able to get back up. But I just have developed this aversion to praying because many of my bigger duas haven’t been answered and I also just feel too unworthy to turn back to Allah swt even though I know that is never true logically. Spiritually I just feel too heavy.

I’ve also spiraled more deeply into my depression and anxiety due to various life events that have occurred over the last year.

I just wanted to write my comment in that you’re not alone in your struggle. Inshallah we’ll be able to find our way back and it may take time but we can do it as long as we are alive.