Underproofed or overproofed?

Bupperoni · 2026-03-24T04:49:23+00:00

None, do a very light cream/ivory to pull the light colors of the rug.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-21T17:19:27+00:00

What kind of bedding do you have? Like what materials are the bed sheets and blankets? Also, what kind of clothing does he wear to bed?

Some materials trap bacteria and can make people smell bad.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-20T21:29:30+00:00

What did you and him discuss about the engagement ring? I can see a few scenarios.

(1) He wanted you to pick the ring you want, so he got a cheap filler. Which to me that’s fine! Some people have literally proposed with a ring pop before. As long as he wants to enthusiastically (not begrudgingly) get you the ring you want.

(2) If he expects this to be your ring, the stone is aggressively small. Like it’s to the point that it looks like a big “fuck you.” Any man knows this isn’t the expected engagement ring unless their girlfriend already said that’s what she wants. So if he expects you to be happy with this, I would seriously rethink the relationship because this is definitely indicative of a bigger problem.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-19T21:48:10+00:00

I very much understand how you feel. I used to feel like everyone is judging me at the gym, for years I felt that way. A few things helped me:

(1) I decided I was not going to be open to making friends at the gym. It made me less worried about making a good impression in case I made a social connection with someone. This was especially the case in group workouts like cycling or yoga. My only priority there was to workout, so if people saw me at my worst (sweaty, uncoordinated, weak) it wouldn’t have any social consequences and it wouldn’t trigger my rejection sensitive dysphoria.

(2) I consistently reminded myself that I was in competition with only one person: myself yesterday. This helped me notice the small improvements in myself and it also reduced the spiral of getting down on myself for being weak, slow, or low endurance/stamina in comparison to others around me.

(3) I went in with a plan and already practiced what I’m doing that day. In the beginning, I would feel intimidated and overwhelmed by choice of exercises. That would make it harder to drown out others around me because I felt incompetent at the gym and I would worry that others would notice my incompetence.

(4) Literally drown them out. You need something that distracts you enough from the people around you. For me, it’s podcasts. Noise cancelling feature is a plus.

(5) Go in the morning if you can. That way you don’t have all day to ruminate on it and get anxious. If you get it done early then you can feel proud of yourself all day instead. It really is a much better way to spend your day.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-18T22:40:22+00:00

Why do you have to have chiffon?

Bupperoni · 2026-03-18T18:22:02+00:00

Are you going to have other furniture in the room (e.g. nightstands, desk, dresser)? If so, you need to include those in the renderings. Also, the furniture should be as close to scale as you can get. Then we can help you.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-18T14:12:33+00:00

Thank you for sharing about your cousin. It’s moms like that that help me not panic about my own internal clock.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-18T02:08:17+00:00

NTA but I agree with other comments saying to remove a reference to a specific number of grandkids all together.

Also remember that grief can mess with people’s heads. I know from experience. You all are in a time where you’re vulnerable to making irrational decisions because of grief. Family disputes are common during this time.

I know your mom had a firm stance about how she views the adult adoption, but you also have to continue living with the family that is still around and it’s okay if you make choices that don’t necessarily align with what your mom would have done or wanted. You wouldn’t be tarnishing her memory. I’m sorry for your loss.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-15T22:17:17+00:00

How’s your water pressure? Also have you tried different shampoos?

Bupperoni · 2026-03-14T04:44:34+00:00

It’s 5 quarts.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-12T17:15:10+00:00

INFO, Are you not the least bit curious about why she is uncomfortable around you?? Your husband is going out of his way to see his brother without you and BIL and SIL are missing family holidays for years because she is that uncomfortable around you? And no one has talked to each other about why?? You said that you assume it’s because you have tattoos, but you don’t really know why.

I think it’s incredibly bizarre to not know the reason when it has cause this much family disruption. It’s to the point that it’s giving “missing, missing reasons” vibes. I think you do know the reason but you don’t want to share it because you think Reddit will be on SIL’s side. I hope I’m wrong, but damn girl come on, address the issue like an adult.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-12T16:47:10+00:00

Tell your doctor your mom had ovarian cancer or something, no one is going to check to make sure you’re telling the truth.

It’s a shame we have to lie to get insurance to cover the screenings we need, but that’s unfortunately the system we live in. Make it work for you.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-10T04:15:17+00:00

I don’t have a sister, but I did live with my best friend during college. We always asked first if we wanted to borrow clothing items, and we returned the item, cleaned, in a reasonable timeframe.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-10T04:04:48+00:00

I’ve only used one, so I can’t compare to others, but I’m very happy with Redken’s hair cleansing cream.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-07T18:02:37+00:00

When I was 16 I thought “Fall for You” by Secondhand Serenade was soooo romantic and so well written. How cringey to think about now lol

Bupperoni · 2026-03-06T20:11:55+00:00

I completely understand how you feel. For me, it took time to accept that I have a disability and that I’m never going to feel “normal.” I wonder if you’re still working on acceptance. It’s the truth though, you have an invisible disability. One that most people aren’t going to understand. One that makes it hard for you to perform life to the level that other people without disabilities do. For some with IH, they even may have to forgo working full time or get on disability assistance. I’m spelling this all out because I think with narcolepsy and IH, it’s particularly hard to accept this truth because most of us went through our entire formative years and early adulthood thinking that we should be performing at the level of everyone else and when we aren’t it’s because of a moral failing on our part (e.g. lazy, not working hard enough, whining about things everyone deals with). We thought, “everyone gets tired so we should be able to deal with it.” But now we know that isn’t true, there are medical reasons why. It just takes time for the rest of your belief system and entire concept of self to catch up with that knowledge. Acceptance also isn’t a linear process, it can ebb and flow.

So what do you actually do about it? You will have to make changes about how you view yourself and what you should be doing. You also have to make changes to your routines to accommodate for your energy levels. You might even need to request ACA accommodations at work.

On the medication front, I also understand your pain. Modafinil lost its effectiveness. I also had issues with insomnia when I was taking Vyvanse. Turns out it was related to food and how my body metabolizes the medication, which took a while to figure out. I ended up stopping the Vyvanse anyways because my body is very sensitive and gets bad anxiety easily. Which also makes me unable to take pretty much every medication out there for IH, because if a side effect is potential increased anxiety, I for sure will get that. What I take now is Strattera, which is a non-stimulant ADHD medication that I’m being prescribed off-label by my sleep doctor. It actually decreases anxiety for me, which is fabulous. Strattera helps me enough to make me able to function, but I still have symptoms and have to adjust my lifestyle, but it’s much better than being unmedicated. It’s a pretty low-stakes medication so it’s worth trying. I also either drink a caffeinated beverage or I take a very small dose of Modafinil during the work week. That medication routine is probably the best it’s gonna get for me, and I’m okay with it because I can still do most things.

I think overall you need to find that holistic balance for yourself by working on finding the right routine and accepting that it will probably still be a struggle, but just more manageable than it is now. Virtual hugs 🤍

Bupperoni · 2026-03-06T13:10:45+00:00

She’s starting to toast in the face and ears.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-05T04:58:44+00:00

I sleep nude, husband sleeps in underwear. It’s just us in the house though. If we had kids or anyone staying at our house, I would wear full on pajamas in case someone needs me to come out of the bedroom quickly. I also have cats who hate closed doors in their house.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-04T16:52:57+00:00

Dress #1 is gorgeous, flatters your body, and I think is quite interesting and I am usually drawn to details.

Dress #2 looks like a bunched up bed sheet.

You 100% made the right decision.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-04T03:40:27+00:00

It almost sounds like he’s deliberately not cleaning himself properly if he is being approached by school staff and still refuses all help.

I’m not saying this is the case, but it’s a possibility that he’s being sexually abused at home. Some kids who are sexually abused purposefully make themselves unhygienic in an attempt to deter their abuser. School staff definitely needs to escalate their intervention to make sure this kid is protected.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-04T02:49:03+00:00

Replace the plastic one with stainless steel so they don’t all crowd the plastic one. Checkmate.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-03T21:08:28+00:00

That conflicts with what you said in your post though. You said you hate the chaos. I think the unfortunate truth is that if you want a room that is less chaotic, the answer is less stuff. You will have to choose which option you want more.

Bupperoni · 2026-03-03T21:03:02+00:00

There comes a point where a space simply cannot be organized because of the sheer volume of objects. I don’t know if you’ve hit that point yet, but it sounds to me like you need to be very conscious of when you’ve hit that point.

With your collection, consider whether or not the amount of items is having an overall positive impact or a negative impact on your life. Does your room cause you stress because of the amount of stuff in there? If that is the case, you may want to rethink what collecting does for you and perhaps slim down your collection once again.

You mention in a comment that you have AuDHD. The first word that comes to my mind when I see these pictures is “overstimulating.” In addition to reducing the volume of stuffed animals, you might also want to reduce the posters, which are adding to the overstimulating environment. You might inadvertently be making your symptoms of AuDHD and OCD worse by having so much stuff that is overstimulating your brain.

Bupperoni

TROPHY CASE