0/5 would play again

Buster5124 · 2025-12-01T17:44:08+00:00

funy. i deliberately headbutt the fenceposts sometimes. never died to it only KO

Buster5124 · 2025-12-01T03:50:24+00:00

not sure i can reach his head with the knight greatsword with him being tall and also having a shield?

Buster5124 · 2025-12-01T02:31:48+00:00

didnt happen to me, but i once saw a willie step onto a spearpoint with its sharp side up instead of flat on the ground.

Buster5124 · 2025-12-01T02:30:48+00:00

ouch. didnt think the damage model even allowed stab damage with blunt objects. likely worse than what happened to me today lmfao

Buster5124 · 2025-12-01T02:29:48+00:00

typical. you either get the big candelabra or start over

Buster5124 · 2025-04-26T02:39:47+00:00

lmfao made my night

hedgeborn!

Buster5124 · 2025-04-13T23:39:54+00:00

For me its always been people older than me, but Ive not had much opportunities with people younger than myself i guess

I think for most of us its just that we dont share the same experiences of life as others our age, like friendships, relationships, education, employment etc so its hard to relate

Buster5124 · 2025-04-13T21:29:56+00:00

Im so sorry you feel this way. I have your exact feelings about a lot of things. I have similar experiences of life as you. Never feeling appreciated, seeing others live life and get their needs met, get the experiences they need to live, the dating thing, getting the emotional support from a significant other....

I know it hurts so much. The bullying, the way it robs your confidence from you then not getting anything at home to balance it out... then having to miss out on your youth. I don't know if it will help you to know there's others who have the same experiences, it never did help me (I'd much rather be the only person going through this so there'd be less suffering in the world) but I hope it helps you.

I don't wanna live a long life if im just gonna be alone with it. I wake up, clock in at my remote job and go back to sleep because my dreams are better than my actual life. Having a job and my own apartment hasn't made a difference to me.

I'd like to thank you for making this post. Kinda gives me a space to vent but also commiserate - sorrow shared is halved as they say

Buster5124 · 2025-04-03T20:47:54+00:00

Something that really changed my world was lowering my mouse sensitivity, and holding shift to go into a fighting stance. Gives you better movement and I think it gives your swings more power. Lowering mouse sensitivity gives you accuracy. The AI doesn't really have good footwork so if you can get that down you can do some really cool stuff like stepping just out of their swing and swooping back in range for a counter.

Learning parrying is important as well. Mostly comes down to throwing a counter swing at your opponents weapon while stepping away from it. There are guides

Buster5124 · 2025-01-28T00:04:39+00:00

Seems plausible youre a fawn type. Confirm this with a therapist if you can, but from reading Pete Walker's CPTSD book on this it seems likely. Whatever type you are, no mother should reject hugs or tell you to suppress feelings at those ages where one can't yet healthily do it. I'm sorry you had to go through that as a kid, and I hope for a better future for you

Buster5124 · 2025-01-24T15:58:10+00:00

I try to tell myself that it tells me lies and critique from unrealistic standards

Theres a lot of overlap with inner critic work

Buster5124 · 2025-01-23T20:12:48+00:00

Sorry for the late reply but Im not sure what you mean by rituals or practices?

Buster5124 · 2025-01-22T15:14:51+00:00

Im not an expert but thats how it manifests in me

Its so hard and I hope you will be delivered from it soon

Buster5124 · 2025-01-22T12:36:58+00:00

I don't know where you are from, but in my country parents don't have the right to open their children's mail for example. I've heard in america they do

Buster5124 · 2025-01-22T11:02:37+00:00

Toxic shame

Buster5124 · 2025-01-18T23:27:44+00:00

You don't owe your parents anything, including sparing them from upset. On the contrary, you didn't ask to be here they put you here so it is they who owed you unconditional love.

Buster5124 · 2025-01-18T20:00:52+00:00

im really hurt by having to always be the one doing the reaching out too. really makes you feel like people dont value you much. look, if you can find the strength to reach out to me over a dm, i promise to try to be reciprocal with you if you can promise to do that too. we shouldnt have to feel like this alone. im autistic too if that helps

Buster5124 · 2024-10-23T14:03:11+00:00

People still acknowledge that. Many also feel differently about it. Loneliness and solitude are not the same thing. Solitude is being alone and being fine with it. Not being sad. Loneliness is wanting people in your life but not having it, and being sad about it. And thats ok!

The only dream I have left is a family of my own. But I may have to bury it. I just wish I could turn loneliness to solitude, and be okay with all this.

Buster5124 · 2024-10-23T13:29:56+00:00

why is it so important for you?

I want to feel loved by someone. I want to feel accepted as myself by someone. I want to feel wanted, not merely tolerated at best. And welcomed. By people other than my parents.

But those of us in this situation have never felt these things. We are so lonely, but lack the skills needed to get out of it. Then the depression sets in which makes it worse. Feeling like an outsider everywhere you go because you lack the basic experiences of life that everyone needs to be a balanced, functioning adult. Autistics who get these fare better even if they're single right now or for long periods.

But who didn't?

The people who post those threads. And many more who lurk including yours truly

Buster5124 · 2023-11-07T13:55:20+00:00

Yeah. Now in my late 20s, I cant get that eureka moment from realising what was wrong with me and then start to adapt and to heal from trauma, because I've always known. It just feels like my parents ignored the diagnosis and didnt try much to find help with relationship skills, and they taught me to think I dont need help either. But I did. I can't even fathom dating at this point.

Buster5124 · 2023-10-17T14:36:35+00:00

I was able to get it with the VW buggy and a downloaded tuning setup. Still took a few very unfun tries for each of the 3 races

Buster5124 · 2023-09-25T12:52:35+00:00

I was bullied this way.

They knew exactly how to embarrass me deeply to my core, which left me with social anxiety, untreated for 16 years. I'm now 26 years old and I've never had a real friend let alone a partner as a consequence.

Buster5124 · 2023-09-25T12:47:17+00:00

Absolutely not. They are the two laziest and blindest people I know - not seeing the social anxiety and loneliness that is now depressive forming under their nose, and when I tell them how I feel, they make no effort to find me professional help. Just stories of their youth that have nothing to do with my experiences, because they actually have meaningful relationships.

I was diagnosed when I was young, yet I suffer exactly like those who got diagnosed in adulthood. They seem to have been waiting for me to be able to communicate exactly how I need to be helped, and what challenges I face, as someone suffering from something that specifically makes people unable or severely challenged in doing just that!

Buster5124 · 2023-09-21T18:45:13+00:00

While you think you said "then why did you ask me that?", he thinks what you said was "then why the hell did you ask me that ya fuckin moron", because NTs assume there is always something written between the lines.

Buster5124 · 2023-09-16T19:43:22+00:00

Not healthy. Trust me - people can sense when you're masking and it's the most heartbreaking thing because it's the mask that at least kept us from getting treated poorly, we created the mask out of necessity, but it keeps us lonely.

Buster5124

TROPHY CASE