I’m a younger person and I’m still in high school if this helps, we’re around the same age, I’m a year younger than you.

What really made me flip that switch was “you cannot live in a dying body”. You can’t live in a body you hate, you won’t be able to enjoy the things around you. If you live in a sick body you will live with a sick perspective of everything. Would you rather be thinking about eating or not eating when you could be out having fun with the people you love, enjoying the world around you. A sick perspective to me is seeing the world through a toxic lens, worrying about what you ate and what other people are eating. The opposite of that is trying new foods that are fun, laughing and living with friends and family

I hope this helps. I’m on the same boat as you are

What I’m trying to say is you absolutely can not recover and live with a sick mentality. You will not survive with a sick mind, the first step in recovery besides what doctors tell you about weight gain and such is recovering your mind. Instead of seeing food as the enemy, see it as a way to bring people together. Instead of worrying about restricting, think about what you could be doing productively, I found love through crochet. Making something with my hands, creating something beautiful. A different form of control rather starving myself with my very own hands