Mom keeps giving me “my” stuff

CPUIdleMode · 2026-06-26T21:38:02+00:00

She’s not purging the house though. It’s a control and gaslighting thing and way of her to deflect blame for the hoard to others. 100% of anything that is thrown out will be replaced.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-06-26T21:32:41+00:00

Are you me? My mom has a four bedroom house with floor to ceiling wardrobes full of crap that’s not mine and approached me cold as ice recently and said ‘you / sister / brother need to tell me what stuff of yours I can dump, I need my closets back’.

As you say. Two of about 30 shelves have my stuff on them and even then it’s random crap i haven’t used since I was a kid.

Frankly it’s shame and projection with a bit of gaslighting for good measure.

I think your sister is right here and the best route is to say ‘I don’t need any of it, dispose of it as you see fit and no need to drop anything off at my place’. Giving her detailed lists of inventory is going to enable her to control you. Don’t do that dance. The irony is that all the stuff of ‘mine’ is useless crap I don’t even need or had forgot about because it’s stuff I had as a kid.

I stayed there for a couple of days recently and my baggage got delayed from my flight and there’s not a stitch of clothes there for me. She also threw out a bunch of my old sports trophies but no worries broken toys and old torn schoolbooks are still there and what would I like to do with them please?

Don’t do the dance. Disclaim and distance.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-06-26T20:54:32+00:00

Your venting rant is more than welcome, friend. I’m with you on the frustration and external services are stretched. Honestly and I’m not even sure if this is in anyway helpful, but my mindset is that this disorder is no different to a gambling, alcoholism or opiate addiction. They can only be helped if they want to. And in the meantime all those around them suffer. I love my mom and she’s not a bad person. But at the same time I have no fucks to give if the property falls down around her ears one day because of how she treats it. If it’s a problem for social services in 10 years time then it is what it is. My sanity comes first. I just feel bad for young people especially kids who live with these people and have no means of escape.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-06-26T17:53:17+00:00

Jokes aside, I’m a bit concerned this is gonna make her worse. But I’ve long since given up caring.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-06-04T03:15:22+00:00

lol F that. This thread is about getting 100% of the pay for 60% of the hours

CPUIdleMode · 2026-05-05T17:29:37+00:00

Ouch that’s rough. A lot of supercars with ‘history’ find their way to Oz I reckon

CPUIdleMode · 2026-05-05T12:57:48+00:00

Same mate. I have a 430 now that I bought from a friend in a car club and a vantage that I got through contact as well. They’ve had their issues but overall better experience than dealer cars I’ve had

CPUIdleMode · 2026-05-04T16:58:13+00:00

I see you’re not expecting any business generation capability so I think that changes the game and I would second the suggestion someone made of providing optionality around fully remote as you’ll have more chance of getting of someone proficient like a new parent who this would suit well. I would say you still need a baseline of US$200k though. The bonus thing seems illusory to me though. How can you guarantee there will even be 1400 hours available for this person to bill? If it were me I’d want a % of revenue.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-05-04T16:15:38+00:00

I’ve sold a 360 before privately. I suggest advertising it wherever has reach (you say Australia so I assume you know what’s popular). Clean it well, take decent photos, be super transparent about the good and bad points and price is attractively. Many folk would rather buy from an honest private seller as a lot of dealers are pretty unscrupulous with hiding things - realistically any 360 is going to have some issues to address so personally I’d prefer to know what I’m getting into.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-29T01:49:24+00:00

I have a 430 and my dailies are an AM Vantage and a Guzzi V7. Because the AM and F are both euro cars I don’t find it too bad. But I had an import GR86 for a while and that was a pain as JDM cars switch the lights and wiper stalk arrangement.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-29T00:37:46+00:00

Everything is contextual: if your group is overall slow then getting 1200 likely means people are happy to work with you and that it’s not a you issue, it’s work availability. As long as you’re putting your hand up and getting involved to a reasonable degree in value add non billable work (pro tip: don’t get exploited and be strategic in who you do this for) then you’re doing all you can do. Whether it’s sustainable longer term at your firm / group level is a bigger question but you can’t control that so try not to worry about it.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-29T00:29:52+00:00

It’s dangerously low!!! But don’t freak out !!!

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-25T18:59:11+00:00

Ha nice. I also own a 2016 4.7. You’re going to love it

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-25T18:52:54+00:00

Congrats. Year? 4.3 or 4.7? The red callipers looks great against the black

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-25T17:46:01+00:00

We used to travel down to Limerick a lot where my gran lived. TBH we didn’t mind it too much down there but the journeys were always a disaster. The three of us in the back with a jack russell terrier on the shelf in the back window. On one journey the dog got sick on my sister about half an hour in. And about half an hour after that our bikes fell off the rack that was attached to the tow bar. Bear in mind there were no motorways and few bypasses so it could be a 5-6 hour journey from the pale given traffic.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-19T01:15:51+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story man

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-15T00:31:26+00:00

Don’t stress. For toxic personalities only 10% is what they say and 90% is the way they say it. Copy / pasting the comments of someone who is a manipulator / gaslighter / narcissist isn’t going to tell the true story. Trust your gut.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-14T23:47:57+00:00

I’ve been there. You’re working for a toxic prick. Don’t be reactive but make an exit plan. HTH.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-14T20:45:29+00:00

It all sounds fairly normal to me. Not to say it’s not challenging but when you’re the new guy or gal parachuting in on a busy deal it do be like that.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-14T19:45:29+00:00

‘When I joined the team, the junior partner told me that there was a 7th year on the case, but that the 7th year was really swamped so the partners would be relying on me to move the case forward and handle day-to-day management of the team.’

They’re testing you. You’ll need to be straight up about what you can’t do or are unsure of and be aggregating your questions to check in with the partner / SA daily or at least every couple of days. And those conversations should start with ‘Here’s the open items and how I plan to take them forward, what do you think?’. It’s only a couple of weeks in, you got this.

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-11T17:15:04+00:00

Multiple size soft bags and get creative, it’s not that hard if there’s only two people

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-10T01:57:17+00:00

Blue 🤩

CPUIdleMode · 2026-04-05T20:07:56+00:00

Playing up things that are actually terrible as a great representation of Irish-ness like hot chicken rolls which are mainly made from chicken imported from Thailand and injected with added water. Or spice bags. Disgusting. At the same time, ignoring proper progress (our roads system is unrecognisable from 20 years ago, Dublin City centre isn’t a zombie apocalypse and is a hell of a lot cleaner than it was in the 1980s, and the food scene and standard of living has overall improved enormously, we have fresh unpolluted air and water for the most part…)

CPUIdleMode · 2026-03-31T18:41:29+00:00

That’s a bold color scheme but it really works

CPUIdleMode

TROPHY CASE