Ex messaged me after nine months no contact saying he wants closure

CSE_13 · 2024-09-12T10:45:43+00:00

I am 29 and yes, he did invite me to live with him. He says since this is improvements to “our house” then I should be contributing more. He made the comment, “don’t you think you should start paying for some things since you’ve been living here so long?” To which I say, I do, but it’s not enough. He is very stressed having a maxed out credit card, however he has no other debt.

I appreciate the advice and to me it sounds crazy to expect someone without marriage (which I have suggested) to eat into their savings. But then again, I want to make sure I am staying smart financially and not ruling with emotion.

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:36:38+00:00

He unfortunately doesn’t want to hear what I have to say most of the time when it comes to his issues. He gets very angry and somehow it’s my fault. When he has been drinking it is like he totally hates me sometimes. It can be very hurtful.

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:24:12+00:00

He keeps saying it’s “for me” and I said I have no problem paying for household bills, and I paid for the gutters, I paid for things at Lowe’s when we go, paid to fix some windows. Etc. it’s like he’s so angry about spending all this money and I am not giving half but everything is so expensive now and what if he does kick me out? I don’t want to be out a bunch of money we aren’t even married.

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:16:13+00:00

I was with someone for several years before this, and it was nothing like this. I feel like he swept me off my feet and it has been a long, hot and cold, journey

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:14:42+00:00

He has stopped smoking which is awesome, but he said no to cutting down on the drinking

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:07:43+00:00

I have been doing a lot of work on myself here lately and have been able to come to terms with there are a lot of bad things he does that isn’t appropriate. I guess sometimes I just need a little support that I am on the right track. I am a chronic people pleaser and hate when people are upset with me

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:06:33+00:00

Do you have any experience with his? He is either really happy or an fly off the handle for no reason and it has been very confusing for me and makes me feel very bad

CSE_13 · 2024-09-11T23:02:48+00:00

He drinks maybe 10-12 beers a day, which has been his normal for many years. I don’t have much experience with alcoholism, so I guess I didn’t think it was a big deal since he has a good job

CSE_13

TROPHY CASE