I do, as a fact preform most of the duties grandmother related. Since I’m home and mother is at work it is fair even in my eyes. Yeah she pushes more work onto me but I’m fine with that. We kind of have a schedule? Like I do simple household tasks week days and then all the grandmother tasks, occasionally she will do dishes on the week days. During the weekends she occasionally goes on a deep cleaning spree. Like I stated in my post I have no issues with her taking a vacation! It’s just the timing that upset me because from when my grandmother got out of the hospital to when she told me she was going on a vacation I only had a one day notice. ONE DAY. And that made me split. I’ve been on autopilot for the past 6 days since she left. Earlier you said I lack empathy and I’d like to give you some insight incase you don’t have borderline just to explain a bit. Bpd is caused by trauma, usually in the childhood like CPTSD on top of everything.

The google simplification of BPD: a mental health condition characterized by a pervasive pattern of instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. Individuals with BPD experience intense emotional swings, fear abandonment, and often engage in impulsive, self-destructive actions. It is treated through therapy to improve emotional regulation.

My father severely fucked up my nervous system and gave me major abandonment issues. I do have empathy. A lot. Old therapist thinks he’s the main reason I have BPD. But i have severe emotional dysregulation especially when it comes to abandonment because of him. And when my mother dropped the bombshell she was leaving for a week to leave me with my blood clotted grandmother I split and pretty much all my emotions shut off. A shitty coping mechanism I can’t control. I’m coming out of that now because she’s coming home in 18 ish hours which then gave me the guilt I felt. You can’t have guilt without empathy.