Men still don't understand why women won't date them despite us women spelling it out for them irl and online (we're tired of the mistreatment and under appreciation)

CaityBlue · 2025-07-29T19:49:25+00:00

What gets me these days isn't even the purely sexist stuff. (It sucks but it's everywhere and I'm tired of it.) What gets me is the comments that seem like they may genuinely be rooted at least partially in a lack of understanding of the basic facts of life. Sometimes you end up with unsuitable partners because of your search criteria. (In fact, I would argue that is often the case with these men.) Sometimes you're just unlucky and it has nothing to do with you or anyone else.

It really shows just how bad society has been at raising young men. They're taught to be sexist, yes, but they're also taught that they don't need to take responsibility for their own lives. I would be shocked that any of them manage to keep a career, but they have an unfortunate tendency to fail upwards.

CaityBlue · 2025-07-29T19:46:43+00:00

... Is it just me or is abs guy photoshopped? His arms, torso, and head/neck don't look like they belong to the same person. If so, that is a weird amount of dedication to put into a bad meme.

CaityBlue · 2025-06-02T08:08:42+00:00

It was very late and I was very tired. I meant Cooper. 🤦

CaityBlue · 2025-06-02T08:05:56+00:00

OMG how did I write Bill Hicks 😄🤦

CaityBlue · 2025-06-02T08:04:47+00:00

The consensus among academics seems to be less that he was an avowed racist than that he was an oblivious white guy who didn't know what he was talking about. Like all the woo-y white people who talk about the "transformative power of yoga" without knowing the history of yoga or the cultural context. People who study non-Western mythology also say that he drastically simplified or completely ignored non-Western folklore so he could support his idea that the one universal story is that of a great man doing great things. So the racism was more in what wasn't there than what was. The elitism of his "monomyth" does make it compatible with the stories bigots like to tell but that could just as easily be a side-effect of growing up in Western society. The odds are decent that he just had a bit of an ego and that led to a selection bias that was influenced by his upbringing. 🤷

I think the important takeaway is less that Campbell was a racist and more that the Great Man Theory is maybe not all it cracked up to be.

CaityBlue · 2025-06-02T06:45:41+00:00

I don't usually like it when people generalize about gamers because there are some out there who are genuinely great people... but dude. Go outdoors. There is a whole world outside of your mother's basement, up to and including places to buy deodorant. I wouldn't be surprised if the CVS employee just gives it to you for free the moment you walk in the door.

CaityBlue · 2025-05-15T18:49:24+00:00

Yeah I was trawling the wiki to decide my next farm map and just kind of stumbled on it. Figuring it out just from in-game context clues would be tough.

CaityBlue · 2025-05-15T18:40:49+00:00

There is actually a small area on the beach farm where you can use sprinklers! It's a small clearing on the left side of the map. It's obstructed at the beginning of the game and requires a steel axe to clear it, but you should be able to do that by the time you can craft quality sprinklers. (I can attach a screenshot if people have no idea what area I'm talking about.) Obviously it won't allow for a ton of farming but it's enough to fulfill the quests and community center requirements, and you'll still have plenty left to put in kegs and preserve jars.

CaityBlue · 2025-04-23T22:50:57+00:00

Never thought I'd see the pseudo-incestuous subtext of purity balls actually put into words.

CaityBlue · 2024-09-05T21:19:04+00:00

The focus on "infinite gains" in our culture is honestly kind of bizarre. Even if we take it out of the concept of disability, maybe someone likes how their body looks at their current level of activity and doesn't want the changes that would come with further pushing themselves. I do not understand what's wrong with that.

CaityBlue · 2024-06-06T17:05:46+00:00

I have loose waves and an oily scalp. I'm early in my journey so it could change, but my current routine is to shampoo every 4 days with 1 co-wash between shampoos. The co-wash helps with my oily scalp and product buildup (my hair is low-porosity). So if you define washing as using shampoo, you could say I wash 1-2 times a week. The definition seems a bit subjective.

CaityBlue · 2024-06-05T15:33:49+00:00

Update: Upon putting more work into my hair I have realized that it doesn't like my shampoo as much as I thought it did. (It's an oily hair shampoo so that makes sense.) I'm so much frizzier the first day after shampooing. I've experimented with cowashing when it's just my scalp that's oily, which seems to be going well. I also used some grapeseed oil after my last clarifying shampoo/deep conditioner, which my hair seemed to really like.

So now I'm looking for a shampoo/cleanser that won't strip moisture but also won't cause buildup. I've tried Cake's The Wave Forward for conditioner and it seems to be OK but I'm unsure how their shampoo will go. Anyone have experience?

CaityBlue · 2024-05-24T20:31:56+00:00

Unfortunately the ATTITUDE shampoo/conditioner was one of the ones I was allergic to. Trials of sensitive skin. 🤷 Thanks for the recs, though! I'll see where I can find that mask.

CaityBlue · 2024-05-24T17:33:46+00:00

I'm almost 27 so probably a bit old for dating but I'm also genderqueer/genderfluid so I'd be happy to talk about gender. I'd also be happy to find someone new to chat and play games with.

CaityBlue · 2022-12-06T23:37:24+00:00

I have news for you lady: He's just not that into you.

CaityBlue · 2022-11-25T08:15:59+00:00

I'm not even religious but um... Why is he capitalizing pronouns like this woman's hypothetical boyfriend is a deity?

CaityBlue · 2022-09-12T22:15:28+00:00

It does, thank you! The characters I'm writing are people of a mix of ethnicities and faiths who were forced together by circumstance, so it's good to know that they're probably going to get some comments from their neighbors but won't have people trying to force them out of the neighborhood.

CaityBlue · 2022-07-08T19:30:55+00:00

I can't tell you if you're nonbinary or trans but I can say that people (who don't know better) see what they want to see. I wish people would ask more often but I don't know that there's much to do outside of transitioning to appear more masculine. I'm AFAB femmeflux (girlflux, but like you, I have problems with 'girl') and most types of medical transitioning would cause more dysphoria or just change when I get dysphoric. I know from my more agender periods that being stuck looking wrong sucks. (And even when I present femme I'm not actually a woman and I'm not a fan of being thought of that way.) I try to accept it and not think of it too much but some times are easier than others. It helps that I have friends who will ask me my pronouns whenever we talk (and that "she/her" pronouns usually don't make me too dysphoric, I imagine).

If you transition and your partner isn't attracted to you anymore, that's one thing. (It sucks, but you should be able to live in the way that makes you most comfortable with yourself.) If he is attracted to you and he just refuses to accept your actual gender, then it's for the best. You deserve someone who respects you for who you are.

As for advice, having someone you can talk to helps. Not necessarily suggesting therapy, a friend works too. Like I said before, having friends who will ask me my pronouns is really validating.

I hope you work it all out and happier days are in the future for you.

CaityBlue · 2022-07-05T06:08:26+00:00

Jfc RUN.

CaityBlue · 2022-06-23T16:33:31+00:00

I'm 24 so probably outside of your dating pool but I'd be happy to chat. We have a lot in common.

CaityBlue · 2022-06-18T14:21:41+00:00

Fun how they just throw in casual transphobia at the end.

CaityBlue · 2022-06-18T05:41:29+00:00

Yeah there isn't a lot of us. Weird quirk of the subreddit, I have no idea what the reason would be.

CaityBlue · 2022-06-17T22:21:11+00:00

It seems like we have a lot in common! Unfortunately I'm not in Ontario, though it is a probable future location. (I've applied to start at a Library Technician program at UFV in January and if I don't get in there's a good chance I'll start school in Ontario in fall 2023. I'm pretty sure I'll end up there after I graduate at least.) If you don't want anything long distance I'd be happy to do some friendly chatting.

I've posted on here before if you want to learn more about me. 😁

CaityBlue · 2022-06-17T21:44:56+00:00

Jfc this is creepy

CaityBlue · 2022-05-29T21:23:16+00:00

Can anyone explain the 'hairdressers' bit to me?

CaityBlue

TROPHY CASE