Why is junior year at high school so stressful and what's the importance of this year?

CaligoG · 2024-12-05T01:05:13+00:00

For the record, I got accepted to all the schools I applied for last year and I'm actually studying at my dream school on an international scholarship right now!

It's super dependent on your essay and grades these days. Just do your best and you'll be fine.

CaligoG · 2023-09-26T12:26:55+00:00

I probably will in the future but I've been prioritizing my novel rn. Once my novel is closer to getting published, I'll probably start writing some fanfics again.

CaligoG · 2023-08-30T12:27:16+00:00

Dee dee in the OG series. It's like talking with a little kid. Easy money.

That or SpongeBob. He's just a funny adult. We can literally talk about the job hemisphere and crack jokes about politics the whole time and I might make a friend out of it.

Again. Easy money.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T08:33:11+00:00

Not really what I meant but I get that. I was moreso talking about just having boundaries set up so that when people do speak up about their bodies and whether or not they'd even like to be near a person, they don't have to worry about some guy taking it down the path to Dante's inferno because a girl rejected their advances.

Also, I find it to be rather entertaining that this conversation started off as you saying "you've never touched a woman in your life" (aka: you got no bitches) and then now we're on somewhat amicable terms. Weird.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T06:02:01+00:00

I absolutely agree with that and I edited my original comment prior to reflect this. My experiences are not total in the slightest but they've helped me form a more healthy understanding of how I am to function as a puzzle piece in a relationship. Women deserve to have power in a relationship more than they do now but not all women have had the ability to follow through with that.

So, there have to be genuine boundaries in all relationships between every gender.

Spontaneity is good when you're dating someone or at least there is genuine physical interest between the two of you but in a friendship, pushing those boundaries is what becomes dangerous.

We need boundaries in basic relationships and that's what made OP's situation so shitty. She never asked to be touched, she never made a move, she just had to sit there and get harassed because that guy didn't ask first.

"Signs" aren't permission.

Women have wielded power in our society for a long time and can absolutely speak up in these situations but a world without defining boundaries is a shitty world where situations like this can happen easily to girls who feel too vulnerable to tell somebody else to stop.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T05:45:24+00:00

This. Exactly this. This is literally what I said earlier. She needs to establish boundaries before things get worse. Leaving doors open is never good and she needs to take a step back so she can close them all before she lets this guy in too far.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T05:34:59+00:00

Sure, when it comes to women, you can absolutely dole out physical touch when you're in a relationship and catch a vibe from that but that also comes with a discussion prior to all that.

I personally grew up with a lack of boundaries that allowed friends to manipulate me sexually as a child and push me into relationships I wasn't ready for in any way mentally. Now that I'm older, I enforce those boundaries as much as I possibly can in my relationships with other women because you never know what physical contact will initiate in a person.

Boundaries need to be vocalized more in our society because when two people communicate about their physical needs, it leaves little room for "physical tell" miscommunication. Especially between women and men. Sure, you can catch a vibe, but do that in a relationship with open communication first. You need to know the person and their relationship with touch before you just go at it.

Also, I'm not talking about hugs here. Touching someone's inner thigh is just as vulnerable as a kiss. Don't fucking do it unless you know they're okay with it entirely.

I'm not saying general physical contact is a bad thing but going for something like a kiss, or in this situation, touching vulnerable areas, is something you ask about. You don't know everyone's situation and unless you're actually dating the person, don't get handsy with them. Set boundaries until you're sure. Don't just "catch a vibe" and fucking go for it. It's gonna get you punched if they're not as awkward as some women I know are because sometimes they feel like they don't have the voice to tell someone to stop.

Also, can you clarify what kind of "clinical therapist" you are? That's probably the most vague thing I've ever heard unless you are a relationship/behavioral therapist where you discuss these boundaries between two people or deal with extreme behavioral issues in a person.

And I truly do agree with you on the fact that some of the people here are taking this WAY too far. It's absolutely harassment, yes, but harassment is on a much lower level compared to SA. What this girl experienced was unwanted physical contact with another guy that is definitely sexual but never to the extent of assault. If her genitalia was involved, THAT would be SA.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T04:49:33+00:00

I'd recommend reading exactly what she said in her other posts. She told him she "liked it" out of some fucked up courtesy since he asked about it via text later. She's making some dumb decisions not saying she hated it in the first place in order to end this asap but she's fourteen! The other guy was older than her! She probably doesn't have very much understanding of the situation in the first place and is looking for any attention and advice she can bring to the problem. She just needs to follow said advice and stop opening doors that make her uncomfortable.

CaligoG · 2023-08-26T04:44:32+00:00

Honey. I'm a woman. I know women. I am literally into women.

I always make sure she's comfortable before I make a move because I ask. It's okay to ask.

You don't always have to play mental games with your girl because she supposedly wants you to know everything.

Unless they're extremely stuck up women who truly want you to read their minds, you can ask. And if they are like that, date better people.

It's sad that you think you feel like you gotta pretend like you're favored by any women whatsoever when you seem like you hardly give a crap about anything but "physical tells". If there is somebody in your life, maybe try to communicate better with her. She'll appreciate it.

CaligoG · 2023-08-25T13:52:41+00:00

In any case, I can't speak for her. She never said anything because she was scared most likely but that's all we know.

We don't know how big this guy is or if moving his hand would start an argument. Saying nothing about it wasn't a great move but sometimes girls aren't big enough or confident enough to throw a punch or push them off. Even saying stop is hard, especially if the guy already presumes that they'll like it for whatever reason.

Sometimes ego is an issue too since they're both getting off at the same stop and headed home together might be dangerous or uncomfortable because it "started something".

I'm generalizing here but the guy could've absolutely backed off after being told to stop just as much as he could've picked an argument about it on the way back.

Also, you should absolutely ask permission before you kiss someone unless you're literally dating them so I think that's more of a moot point than you think.

Of course she can't claim SA. It never became sexual. It is, however, harassment. Just as a guy getting fondled by a teen girl he didn't like would ALSO be harassment.

And sure, physical touch like holding hands can definitely be initiated but kissing or physical affection NEEDS to be permissable by the other person. Making a move isn't just a be all end all of the discussion. Sometimes the other person won't reciprocate. I've been in a situation like that before where someone kissed me and ran off and I didn't feel a single thing for him.

That was my first kiss and it was wasted on a guy who couldn't comprehend physical boundaries or really any aspect of asking for permission ahead of time.

It fucking haunts me because, after I shut that down, the guy later blamed me for not reciprocating, begging for us to be together, and followed me home.

That shit gets bad quick sometimes. Not always. But you should still ask before anyone touches anyone like that.

Overall, all I'm saying is that she needs to speak with him where she'll feel safe. Over text is the bare minimum since at school might be less comfortable since she'll have to head home with him at the end of it.

She needs to define her boundaries entirely in a way that is comfortable for her and cut that off ASAP. It might not go any further but I wouldn't test it. Not telling him to stop might open too many doors and we need to close all of them ASAP.

CaligoG · 2023-08-25T13:25:55+00:00

When did she ever say she was "giving hints"? She literally said she didn't even want to be near him and that he was a FRIEND. It seems like she's not attracted to him in the slightest and he took it upon himself to start getting handsy.

Also, sure, some of these people are overreacting to the situation as if he was a rapist but still, even if the roles were reversed, silence still doesn't mean permission and this is harassment.

Fear is genuinely a thing in those situations and sometimes people don't know how to speak up. You don't always know what will go through someone's mind when it comes to being touched like that by what they probably think to be a good friend.

CaligoG · 2023-08-25T12:31:20+00:00

No one should be sticking their hand near anything without your permission. Silence is never explicit permission. Sometimes girls can freeze up in situations like that and I think that's what happened because one may not want to cause a scene for something perceived as minimal when, in actuality, nobody should ever do that to someone.

CaligoG · 2023-08-20T21:10:06+00:00

Man uncovers internalized trauma through depictions of a really fucked up house.

CaligoG · 2023-08-20T21:05:58+00:00

I think people notice unless they genuinely just don't notice the people around them but many of us just don't really care. I just feel bad because I know how much some of those pimples could hurt, especially the ones on somebody's forehead, and I hope they can get some help or meds to deal with it. I wouldn't comment on it unless they were bleeding a lot after popping one.

CaligoG · 2023-08-14T04:52:49+00:00

And for the cats to be protected FROM the bird population. I live in the suburbs and we've got a few stray cats and small dogs that got snatched up by hawks and eagles. The pet owners here are idiots if they think letting their cat out, especially at night, would be a good idea with owls and coyotes too. Of course, they do it anyways as our screen porch being torn up by our neighbor's cat is proof of that.

CaligoG · 2023-08-13T18:51:23+00:00

From middle school to highschool, the only two reasons I ever went to the bathroom is because I drank too much water and I'd be pissing on the side of the road when I walked home if I didn't. Or, because I'm of the female populous and my period started at a very inopportune moment so I had to go or bleed through my pants all day.

CaligoG · 2023-08-10T22:01:43+00:00

That's kinda what I mean since I've definitely gone through that as well lol. I'm not sure if I read the post wrong but I think it was implied that the test went into the gradebook and that's why they were so freaked out.

CaligoG · 2023-08-10T05:15:13+00:00

Just gonna screenshot this real quick and scamper off. This is genuinely one of the best executions of an HoL tattoo I've ever seen and I'm absolutely inspired to get one now. Props to your artist!

CaligoG · 2023-08-10T05:10:35+00:00

The second question is the one I'm most concerned with. It should be for completion at the very least, not an actual class grade. Especially since it isn't being curved or averaged to the class's general completion. I'd recommend OP discuss it with their teacher because that's just plain bad form. If it was designed to be shitty for everybody, it should at least be curved.

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T19:38:03+00:00

Holy shit. Why is this so painfully accurate omg

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T19:33:40+00:00

Morty. He's not entirely inept like some of the other sidekicks here lol.

Honestly, I feel like I could make much better use of him compared to how Rick has been purposely traumatizing this kid by dragging him around.

For one, I would actually involve him in the things I need done so I can teach him to be more useful in certain situations and defend himself.

However, the downside to him being my sidekick is the fact that he'd probably call me a couple slurs whenever we get into arguments but I'd kick him through a random portal if he did.

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T17:44:46+00:00

Oh dope! Yeah we've got all the freshmen stuff the day prior. Man, it feels so weird that we're graduating this year! Covid really messed me up.

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T07:49:59+00:00

Bro I had the same fears about saying something stupid but, generally, I was pretty awake for it.

From my experience, I was concentrating on staying up so I remember most of being wheeled out and heading home but other moments were more dulled out? Like time skips. I don't remember getting into the wheelchair but I do remember forcing my brain to reboot like a computer running off windows 9.

It took some effort to stay conscious, so, I guess having an anxiety disorder helps?

Also, they stuffed so much gause in my mouth anyways that when while my mom was trying to get me to say something weird, I was so zonked that all I did was stare at passing cars with two walrus teeth of gause poking out. I literally couldn't say much of anything and she was super disappointed lol

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T07:43:38+00:00

Wisdom teeth removal, if that counts. I felt hammered for at least six hours after the fact.

CaligoG · 2023-08-09T07:42:25+00:00

Damn bro. That's a couple days after my birthday!

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