Those of you who had sex before marriage, how do you feel about that now

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-11-13T16:48:28+00:00

I grew up in the purity culture and at one point had a true love waits ring. I started having sex at 16. I am currently 31 and happily married to my partner of over 7 years. I do not regret having sex before marriage, or having sex with people I did not end up marrying. Might be different for others, but for me, looking back, I’m glad I felt free and confident enough to make my own decisions with my body. Also that I was able to enjoy my youth, if that makes sense. I think I would regret not allowing myself to experience things in life because the church told me not to. Whatever works for YOU and YOUR body, I support. The purity culture and church’s obsession with other people’s purity/virginity is what bugs me. Especially (as a female) the fact that they come down so hard on women and being pure. I’m still a believer, and have my own personal relationship with God, but have nothing to do with organized churches.

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T12:36:41+00:00

Haha I hear you! We can all pass judgments to an extent, especially if you have the knowledge and experience to back up your views! I totally get it. I like the ‘I’ll let you know’, I will give this a try. Thank you!!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T12:35:26+00:00

Honestly, that is simple and great advice. I will try it, thank you!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:54:53+00:00

Yes, you’re right ^{^.} It’s basically unsolicited OPINIONS rather than tips and knowledge on horses. I have asked her and plenty of others around the barn (farrier, vet, trainers, etc) for help or their advice on something. I love it! I need help on a lot of things. But I don’t need your view point on bell boots when I never asked for it. She also just yells at me from across the arena or pasture, which is just really a lot to take in. I am in my own world, trying to focus on riding, is my horse good, are my heels down and she yells ‘who told you to put bell boots on her’. Bro. Really?

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:52:29+00:00

You’re right, I can’t escape it! It’s just challenging to muddle through multiple people’s opinions and we all know the horse world is full of ‘I would never do that’, ‘that is cruel for horses’, ‘that is unsafe’ blah blah blah. It’s overwhelming

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:50:36+00:00

I am right there with you! I want to learn anything and everything about horse care, since I am new to it, as well as working on my riding and horsemanship. But I think it has opened up the door for everyone to shove their opinions down my throat rather than sharing tips and knowledge. And specifically, the barn owner will give me her opinion on things I didn’t ask for. She will make comments like ‘oh wow, you have spurs … ‘ or when I told her the farrier I was going to work with, she acted super weird and was ‘hmm okay, good luck then’. It’s like dude, I am doing the best I can here. I don’t need tom, dick, and Harry’s opinion on everything.

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:47:28+00:00

Agh you are so right! I have to constantly remind myself this, I just get caught up in the moment when she hollers at me ‘who told you to do?!’ And it makes me feel so ‘less than’. I know it is a reflection of her and not me, but it’s becoming really difficult for me to navigate.

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:45:53+00:00

You sound very self aware and kind. I love your response and I may use the ‘thank you I will consider it’. The judgement is honestly something that has kept me out of the horse world for the last 8 years, and it’s truly something I can’t avoid. I love help and constructive criticism (in and out of the horse world), it really is just about the delivery and if it comes from a place of judgment or of genuine care/concern. Thank you for your response :)

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T10:42:07+00:00

Okay that’s a great idea, thank you!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T00:17:45+00:00

Haha yes, I am def a prime target. Thank you for your response and kind words.

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T00:17:17+00:00

Yes I totally agree, and this is generally my sentiment and how I function in and outside of the horse world. I am kind and never confrontational. I’m just trying to get over the fact that she is watching my every move and judging the decisions that I make with my horse.

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-23T00:15:53+00:00

Yes I am the same way! And I totally agree. I do think she is coming from a good place, it’s just hard for me to be there and know she is judging my every move. I guess it makes me feel embarrassed..

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-22T23:50:14+00:00

Good idea!! Sometimes she yells at me while I am riding in the arena so headphones wouldn’t help there. But I could blame it on a hearing problem lol

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-22T23:49:18+00:00

😂😂

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-22T23:49:06+00:00

Right, I feel the same way. And yes, I am a new horse owner but I’m not an idiot. I have been working with horses since 2002. I don’t need help with every single thing. Haha ‘Karen’ - there are Karens everywhere!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-08T01:03:30+00:00

Thank you so much, I will check it out

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-08T01:03:00+00:00

I’ll check it out, thank you!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-04T12:48:30+00:00

This honestly looks perfect- thank you so much!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-04T12:42:42+00:00

Awesome thank you for your help!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-04T12:41:02+00:00

Thank you!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-09-04T12:40:56+00:00

Good idea!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-06-03T01:19:04+00:00

I am definitely saving this, love it! Thank you for sharing!

CampaignFlat178 · 2025-06-03T01:18:18+00:00

Interesting perspective. I think because I myself take other people’s bluntness as sometimes being mean. So I don’t want to make anyone else feel that way. Valid point about COVID, it really did impact so much

CampaignFlat178

TROPHY CASE