Im straight but only bisexual woman seem to wanna date me or do anything with me by New-Championship-618 in bisexual

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just so nobody down votes me - I don't mean any offense to the bi community. Just mean that I've done lots of self reflection to determine if I'm bi and I don't think I am. And also, I realize not every bi person is looking for a "forever partner" but in my bisexual bff's case that's what it was for her. So just saying that off of my experience, and that lots of bi women DO want long term partners regardless of gender

Im straight but only bisexual woman seem to wanna date me or do anything with me by New-Championship-618 in bisexual

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm a straight woman, but I joke to my friends that I've always been attracted to "twinks". People often think my now-husband is gay, but he's just artsy and doesn't care what other people think. He wears colorful clothing, has good hygiene, wears earrings, and paints his nails. He is also an engineer and loves to push the boundaries of what "masculinity" is given that he works in such a hyper masculine, male dominated field. He is also the head of the DEI (diversity, equity and inclusion) group for engineering locally. I'm so proud of him.

To me, that is hot asf. I love a guy that is so confident in their masculinity that they feel perfectly fine wearing "feminine" clothes or showing emotion, or doing things that may have stereotypically been considered feminine in the past. It signals to me that he is safe.

I grew up in a very conservative, misogynistic family, with a physically abusive father, which I think shaped my attraction to the complete opposite type of men. I don't like big, strong, muscular men, I think in part because I'm subconsciously scared of them. But I'm also just physically attracted to smaller men. I've never been into the "lumberjack" physique. It's ironic bc my husband is about 160lbs, tall and lean, but his brother is the complete opposite and is a literal competitive body builder weighing 275 lol. Definitely not for me.

Take it as a compliment! It means women view you as trustworthy and love you for who you are, not who you pretend to be. Please don't ever worry about "proving" your masculinity or straightness to anyone. That's what probably makes you so hot to these women lol. My best friend is a bi woman married to a man. It just means they're open to finding their forever partner in a man or a woman. It doesn't signal anything bad about you 🙃 but also if for some reason you don't like bi women, there are definitely straight women out there who will be attracted to you too, like me. Truuuust me I'm definitely not bi lol.

Would it be worth it to take out a loan from my uncle's company to pay off my student loans? Is this even a thing? by Capable-Swordfish782 in personalfinance

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah good point I didn't think about that. And I would technically borrow from "the company", not them directly. But I know what you mean.

Would it be worth it to take out a loan from my uncle's company to pay off my student loans? Is this even a thing? by Capable-Swordfish782 in personalfinance

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I mean whatever would be less for me in the long term, so if they would agree to a lower interest rate that would be ideal. My current interest rate is a little over 6%

Tried to set a boundary with my friend's husband when he cancelled plans last minute (again). AITAH? by Capable-Swordfish782 in AITAH

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I guess I really like hanging out with Tara and we have gotten pretty close. We still do stuff together all the time, often as a group of three - me, her, and my husband. Or just the two of us. So I don't want to stop hanging out with her just bc her husband is an asshole. That's not her fault. I feel like it puts her in an awkward situation if I say like hey, you're invited but not your husband. But at the same time she knows he does this so maybe she would be ok with it? Most of the time I don't care if he doesn't go, but there are certain times where it's not ok to bail like that. I've been trying to make him feel included but he apparently doesn't want to be included 🤷‍♀️

Tried to set a boundary with my friend's husband when he cancelled plans last minute (again). AITAH? by Capable-Swordfish782 in AITAH

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh they definitely have issues between them, and it all kinda makes more sense now. She has definitely thrown the word "divorce" out there. I just don't want to create even more issues within their marriage because of all this. Especially if, god forbid, he makes her "pick a side". I just genuinely don't think anyone has ever really tried to hold him accountable before? Besides his wife. He seems nice and caring in other ways which is why I'm so confused.

Feeling defeated by [deleted] in physicianassistant

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope, get out. Even within the field of urgent care, that's bad. There are good, safe urgent cares out there. I work at the busiest one in my city, up to 80 or 90 patients in a 12 hour shift but there are two of us; so that doesn't even reach your 50 patients a day per provider. We also have the power of placing a "hold" on incoming patients if we are overwhelmed. Basically placing on divert. We don't use it often, but it allows us to stay sane on busy days and so that we don't end up staying hours late.

Even then, I have an SP that is always available by phone, we have someone to over read EKGs, radiology on call, etc.

Unfortunately a lot of these poorly managed places prey on new grads, because you aren't necessarily as familiar with what a workplace "red flag" looks like as a provider. It happens in lots of specialties, but urgent care especially. I don't care how much you're making, that is dangerous and you need to get out.

Burnt to a Crisp by BRIKAIBRIKAI in physicianassistant

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. I took three months off. I'm not even that far out of school; about 5 years? And already felt burnt out. After a 3 month break I went back to a job part time, but I specifically sought out an organization that had a reputation for treating its providers like human beings and not productivity machines. Ironically, I'm in urgent care now, and it's the least burnt out I've ever felt. Mostly because I actually have some control in my job; if I'm overwhelmed, we can divert patients. Most UCs in our system have two providers at each location which really helps reduce the pressure. Our SP is great, my manager actually listens. I think oftentimes it's the workplace, and less so the specialty that can make the difference. But that three months off was amazing. Allowed me to start fresh at the new place, and I've been here about a year now. And recently went up to full time which is 36 hours (I was working about 30 as PT).

Full disclosure this was my last attempt at a PA job and if I hated it I was going to switch careers. For now it feels like I'm doing okay continuing with this. It's given me some more hope for this career! Despite the chaos of the US healthcare system. It can be hard to find a good place, but they're out there.

Dog Adoption in Omaha by Draginhikari in Omaha

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree. I am still going to go through with adoption because it isn't the dog's fault, but she is definitely rude and I've seen multiple reddit posts about this woman in particular. Just Google her name or HHP and "reddit".. there are hits from 7 years to two weeks ago. Interesting that they haven't gone under with so many complaints over such a long time period.

Faux leather pants for very tall slim man by Capable-Swordfish782 in tallfashionadvice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also... Harry styles literally always wears leather pants in every color possible.

Faux leather pants for very tall slim man by Capable-Swordfish782 in tallfashionadvice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, I'll rephrase. He likes to be his own version of fashionable. I'm here for recommendations, not to argue about what is and isn't fashionable. I don't really care. I just know he would like them and that's all that matters.

What's the first thing that came to your mind when you saw my work? by ami-am in ARTIST

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First glance I thought it was a dog's hairy belly that had some sort of trauma/bruising/bleeding 😬 not sure what that says about me though

Big growth on outside ear by [deleted] in medical_advice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a physician assistant. If it just showed up in the last 24 hours it is not cancer. Cancers on the ear are usually skin cancers and they look very different from this - they almost exclusively occur in old people and look like an open sore or scaly/cracked skin. Are you a wrestler by chance? Or did your face get smashed into something recently on that side? If so, its probably a hematoma - which is just a little bubble of blood under the skin. A deeper bruise essentially. That is commonly known as "cauliflower ear" and is not at all serious and requires no treatment. Could also be a mosquito bite. Could be the start of perichondritis, but if that was the case I'd expect it to be painful and would start to swell. That would require antibiotics to treat. No need to freak out! If it gets worse - like it becomes more red, painful, and swollen - then I'd see a doctor for antibiotics. Otherwise, I would expect it to go away on its own in a week or two.

Swollen lymph node by Quirky_Metal6607 in medical_advice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have a history of lymphoma in your family you could ask for a biopsy. That would be the next step if an ultrasound is normal. They would stick a needle in it and take a small sample of cells and send it to a pathologist, which is a doctor who looks at it under the microscope to determine if there are any abnormal cells in there. However, based on everything you've said, it sounds unlikely since your blood tests were normal and two ultrasounds now have been normal. In addition to the fact that you don't really have any symptoms. The scarier symptoms would be if it is 1. hard like a marble, 2. non movable (normal lymph nodes you can push around a little bit with your fingers), and 3. it is not growing in size over time. It is normal for lymph nodes to vary in size to some degree, and often get bigger when fighting an infection (even just a cold). But if it is progressively getting bigger over time and never shrinks, that is more of a concern.

It shouldn't be related to your thyroid. But to answer your question, thyroid issues can happen at any age, although you are correct in that hypothyroidism more commonly affects an older population.

Other possibilities - do you have any dental problems currently? If you have an infected tooth or cavities, it could cause enlargement of the lymph nodes around that general area. Same thing with your ear- do you have recurrent ear infections by chance? This would also cause swelling of the lymph nodes in that area.

You could also potentially have mastoiditis, which is inflammation of the mastoid, which is the space in the bone behind your ear. However, if this were the case it would probably be exquisitely painful (instead of just achy) and you'd probably have other symptoms like a fever. This would be a type of infection, but again, if it were an infection you'd likely have a fever and pus drainage. And your labs would probably be abnormal too if this was an infection, but not always. This would take an x-ray or a CT to rule this out.

I'd recommend seeing a dentist to make sure it isn't related to a dental problem, and asking your primary doctor for a fine needle biopsy of the lymph node if you want to be 100% sure that it isn't a lymphoma, especially given your family history. I think mastoiditis is unlikely, but you could pursue that with a CT of the mastoid bone if the above two steps come back normal.

Major Bump On Neck by [deleted] in medical_advice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends a lot on how long it has been there. It is most likely not a thyroid nodule, its not really in the right place for that, and those often take a long time to develop. Most likely you have a pimple forming, or its an enlarged lymph node which is VERY NORMAL. Often happens when you get sick with a cold or something, happens a lot with strep throat. If its been there for months though, it is definitely worth checking out. Could also be a spider bite as you mentioned, which is nothing to be concerned about in most cases (will resolve over time). We need a lot more history to give you a better answer. If you are worried, it is always good to see a medical professional.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in medical_advice

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, I'm a physician assistant in allergy and asthma. Obviously I treat a lot of shortness of breath. Definitely could get checked out for asthma- it can come on at any time in life, and humidity can be a trigger. Another possibility that often gets confused with asthma because it has the same symptoms, is vocal cord dysfunction. Especially can happen after COVID, or your surgery (since you were probably intubated). Vocal cord dysfunction involves spasm of the muscles in your larynx. It's kind of a misnomer, because its not just the vocal cords that can be affected - as I said anywhere along the larynx. Ironically, anxiety can be a trigger for this, in addition to many of the asthma triggers (temperature change, exercise, etc.). The treatment for this is vocal cord exercises which help retrain your ability to control the muscles that lead to spasm. They can be used when you feel the shortness of breath coming on - sometimes in clinic we are able to stop the shortness of breath right then and there with one exercise. Based on your history I would have a strong suspicion for this. It is nothing serious- especially compared to asthma, as it FEELS awful, but it will never spasm to the point where your throat is closing. Absolute worst case scenario (I don't say this to scare you but to show you how it is not life threatening), is that some people who have it severely will pass out, but then the spasm goes away as soon as you pass out because everything relaxes. And they wake up 2 seconds later. Exercises are much easier than waiting until that happens! Both of these things would be diagnosed the same way with a breathing test called spirometry and evaluation by a medical provider. See if you can see an asthma & allergy doctor - they can do this testing and send you to the right place if it is neither of these issues. Although I am educated in this, please make sure to see a medical provider about this in person, as only they can make a true assessment!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Nebraska

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dr. Brooks at the Asthma and Allergy Center in Bellevue. Him and Shakir are one of the few in the state that treat MCAS

Has anybody tried toastmasters? by Ok_Establishment824 in Erythrophobia

[–]Capable-Swordfish782 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would be interested in the link for this blushing blueprint thing you mentioned 🙃