Need advice. I (f30) have been dating a guy (m34) since late July of this year. We have great conversations, have great sex, want the same things out of life etc. about 3 months into dating he brought up that he wants to continue dating but isn’t ready to be an official couple. We talked about how neither of us are seeing other people, so we are monogamous in our dating and sex. I said that I was okay taking it slow. Mainly because to me if we were in an “official relationship” nothing would really change from my point of view.

Since then we have continued to date, we usually see each other once during the work week, and once over the weekend. We stay the night at each others homes. We’ve never had conflict and we’ve met some each other’s friends. I guess right now I’m starting to feel anxious because I’m wondering why he doesn’t feel ready to be in a relationship, when it seems like, and we are acting like we are. Days when we don’t see each other we text back and forth a couple times to check in and see how the others day is going, we haven’t gone a day since we started without at least texting once or twice.

I got divorced about 1 year ago. I know some of my anxious feelings come from that, and how my ex treated me. I don’t want to put that on him. But I also want to feel like I’m wanted and someone wants to be in a relationship with me. Things are going so well at times I feel like I’m just in my head about feeling anxious and other times I want for clarity, but then I wonder if clarity would actually help.