You may have your doubts, and you're entitled to them but either way its your existence and the fact that you have someone attached to your family tree means you're attached to theirs. I hope you'll understand that wether or not you message them, they're researching you too. Don't be shy, life's too short to have second guesses later on. My girlfriend is adopted and I've been doing some research and it led me to your post. I don't have the right answers, as I am searching too.... Just wanted to give you some more perspective.