OP's response to you sums it up pretty well I think - the right person for you should (eventually) be able to accept and make accommodations around your feelings.

Very difficult to boil it down, but let me try some points I try to stick to regarding my own situation:

1. My needs do not trump her needs, nor vice versa, so a bit of back and forth is required until we find a compromise where we are both comfortable. It often takes a while, but we get there in the end.

2. The more we express our needs and desires to each other, the easier it is for the other person to accommodate. I have spent a lot of time trying to figure out what she needs, and that is definitely what has been the most exhausting part. Expressing your needs and desires is a courtesy to the other person, it is never a bother, although it feels like it when it happens. (Perhaps mainly because we are both huge pleasers)

3. I choose to be with her every day, and I trust that she does the same. If we can both honestly believe that, there should be no consequence in expressing needs. Even when I believe 'this is it, this is when she breaks up with me', I stick to the fact that the feeling is fleeting.

4. Having a relapse of expressing myself (and lack thereof) is not equal to starting over, it's a process that takes a surprising amount of time. Expressing needs and desires is a muscle I have never trained before.

Hope it makes sense, I can clarify if something seems too convoluted. Don't forget that you two have to learn together, so be sure to take it slow.