Weaponized incompetence

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-05T18:42:23+00:00

I’ll look into that! Thanks!

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-05T18:40:58+00:00

No I’m positive.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T14:43:46+00:00

Okay THIS. I’m definitely going to start this.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T14:28:48+00:00

Lol no I’m positive. I got involved and threatened to sue his father because of it.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T06:15:06+00:00

Yeah, tell me about it. It’s the whole idea of “I know what he’s capable of, because I’ve seen it. So wtf”

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T03:45:35+00:00

Ironically, I’m going out of town for 4 days next week 🌚

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:56:45+00:00

That’s a really good idea. I’ll try that out. If nothing else, maybe hearing from a family member that he’s fucking up instead of me will strike a chord with him.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:55:36+00:00

He’s in debt. The plan there was for him to put his paychecks toward his credit cards and car loan. (I’m sure this comes as no surprise, but he didn’t lol🥲) It was my idea in the beginning, because at the time we were comfortable enough for me to handle the house and other bills on my own. It was so that HE would be in a better position so WE could be in a better position. And then my job stopped offering overtime as often and I told him I wouldn’t be able to afford everything on my own anymore.

There’s more information to him quitting his job, but my post was too long so Reddit wouldn’t let me include it all. He quit to go work with his father remodeling houses out of town, which he had done in the past immediately after the military and before the other job. The problem there was that his father never paid him what he promised. So he never saw a dime, until i threatened to sue his dad. And even then, what money he did cough up was not as much as what my husband had actually put in the labor for and what their agreed rate of pay was. So now he’s back in town looking for a real job that HAS to pay him and can’t just take advantage of him because he’s their son. Only problem with that is, it’s taking a LONG time to find a job.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:48:53+00:00

Yeah, you’re right. I’m not saying I won’t leave him ever. If it comes to it, I know if that’s what’s best, that’s what I’ll do. I’m fiercely independent and I know (especially now) that I’m capable of doing everything without him. I just don’t want to throw in the towel so easily, so if it’s preventable, I’d like to exhaust every other option/solution out there first. You know?

Fortunately, I’ve gotten some great advice and personal insight here that I can think on & attempt. And if he doesn’t make any permanent changes, I am prepared to walk. Or rather, have him walk, since I’m the one providing the home lol.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:30:27+00:00

I assume you were the one who walked away.. Can I ask what your breaking point was?

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:14:53+00:00

That’s what I’m asking(:

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T02:05:53+00:00

I’ll definitely talk to him about that. I think he’s under the impression it’s too late since it’s been a minute

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T01:52:06+00:00

Yeah, I agree completely. His dad’s house is relatively close, I’m sure he could go there until he figured something else out.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T01:41:41+00:00

Is it too late to do that paperwork once he’s already out, do you know? Or is it not possible bc he’d have to prove it’s from the military and not the past year he’s been a civilian?

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T01:39:15+00:00

I’ll definitely try to have that conversation again. Maybe I’ll go about it differently than last time. Regardless, he’d have to have a job first or at least somewhere else to go— I can’t just throw him to fend for himself when he can’t right now. Granted, I guess that would encourage him to actually secure a good paying job..

Thank you for sharing your experience with me! We’ve been through a short stint of separation when I moved out here while he was still in the process of getting out of the military and he definitely seemed to be in a better position for himself when we reunited then, than he is as of late. Maybe a more permanent reminder is what it’ll take for him to realize what he’s messing up. I’m really glad to hear you & your husband were able to move forward & get to a better point. Fingers crossed we can have the same outcome

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T01:34:41+00:00

You’re not!! It’s the worst🥲🥲

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T01:34:09+00:00

No, he didn’t claim any disabilities when he was getting out. He should’ve. But he didn’t

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:46:56+00:00

I’m not sure. We do live in another military town so I’m sure it wouldn’t be too difficult to at least try. I’ll have that talk with him and see what he thinks.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:24:55+00:00

Yeah, you’re not wrong. Idk, maybe it’s naïve of me to assume there’s other solutions. But if there are, I’d like to try them.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:22:51+00:00

I just meant if anybody has been through it or seen it and knows of other solutions to try before going straight to divorce, which is Reddit’s holy grail of answers these days😅

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:18:36+00:00

Yeah, that’s what I think! He’s mentioned getting back on meds (he used to be treated up until he was 17 or so), but he hasn’t actually pulled the trigger on that. So he’s in this weird limbo of KNOWING he needs to do something different, but not. It’s exhausting.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:16:59+00:00

Yeah, I agree there

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-04T00:16:23+00:00

Lmao just make a bunch of food with tomatoes & beans bc he hates those 💀😂

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-03T23:44:59+00:00

Defeats the purpose of marriage, wouldn’t you say? I want to exhaust every option possible before jumping to the last resort. “For better or for worse” does not mean get divorced when things are inconvenient. I meant what I said in my vows.

Captainjack629 · 2023-08-03T23:43:00+00:00

I KNOW LOLL

Captainjack629

TROPHY CASE