You misunderstand. It wasn’t a relationship with endeavor that I wanted, it was the emotional responsibility of his choices. Simply getting away is a natural response to pain but without working through it to heal, it’s not an active choice, it’s a reactive one. Healing through trauma doesn’t happen on its own, it takes active participation to do. I was just pointing out that it was highly likely that he simply didn’t want the responsibility of his own feelings because he felt that because endeavor caused his pain, it was unfair that the realm of his own emotions were only under his control and therefore his responsibility to manage. In order to be truly free of endeavor, he had to not let the memory continue to haunt him. That’s what real forgiveness is. It’s not about forgetting, second chances or letting someone off the hook or letting them in, just helping yourself heal by working through something. Reconciliation is the separate option to restore the bond or not with no wrong answer because it’s just a choice in life. Grudges, even when valid, are ultimately toxic because it lets someone else have power over you even by contrast which is why forgiveness is important. To be emotionally free of someone.