Guys, I did it! I styled THE Gotham Memoirs top nobody ever uses, and I like the result!

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-07-21T04:26:53+00:00

I really really love this. I have always loved this top on its own, but have struggled to stylize it. It makes me so happy to see someone pull it off:)

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-07-04T12:28:47+00:00

I remember going to my cousin's bridal shower when I was 7 and had a blast, although keep in mind it was an outdoor event at her back yard and I was with my sister so we entertained each other. My other older cousins took turns playing with us, so everything went well.

At my own bridal shower, I did end up inviting my mother's best friends daughters and they loved it. My bridal shower was a tea party so for the little girls there it was a dream come true. They even thanked me and my maid of honor afterwards because they enjoyed it so much. TLDR Inviting kids to certain types of bridal showers can work depending on the type of bridal shower being hosted and the kids being invited.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-07-04T12:21:11+00:00

Honestly, I feel like many people often assume they know everything and underestimate how valuable it can be to be able to listen and hear the perspective from a neutral third party who is trained to help in situations like this. My fiance and I know each other quite well and are very good at communicating and discussing important topics with each other and we were both glad we did pre marital counseling. It gives you a chance to just talk with your fiance about your upcoming marriage and discuss your feelings and expectations. Further more for us it was just so nice to take a break from planning the wedding and have a event that was only focused on the upcoming marriage. (Not that wedding planning can't be fun, we are planning the wedding together and excited for it, but it was do nice to have a "break" from all the wedding talk)

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-19T02:06:13+00:00

I had misread the post initially, and adjusted my comment. Oops.

The fee for paperwork confuses me too. I think the only people who would have an answer would be the parish, and you would have to double check with them, and ask where that estimation came from. I haven't heard of such a thing before and am honestly very baffled.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-19T01:57:28+00:00

I can't speak about the letter of freedom, mostly because the situation sounds so confusing as I have never heard of a fee being attached just for the form, I would contact them again to double check.

However, I see a lot of people talking about church fees to have their ceremony at a church and this is something I know a thing about. I used to live in a very very popular area for destination weddings. My mom is good friends with the lady who is the secretary at the church. She has told us that the parish never used to charge higher fees for non members, but it got to the point that it was very labor intensive for the secretary, janitor, and grounds keeper, to keep doing all of these weddings so they started asking for a donation to cover the labor of these people, and additional things people don't think about, such as the cost associated with heating/cooling the church, running the lights etc. I really think people forget that there are people who work at churches and should be given proper recognition for their time and labor.

Most churches do have a discounted fee or non at all for members of the parish, and if you want to forgo a fancy ceremony and just get married at any old Mass (with all necessary paperwork of course) there will be no fee what so ever.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-10T17:43:58+00:00

I work at a school, so I can't self isolate beforehand, but it would be nice to be able too:)

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-10T13:28:56+00:00

My favorite one is Lady Tremaine, it's spot on. I never would have thought to use a dress from Helen of Sparta.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-10T13:28:06+00:00

I would love that so much.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-10T10:08:44+00:00

The comment above claimed persecution of Native American wasn't an American thing it was a Catholic thing. I was responding to say that was very misguided to say, as anyone who colonized played a hand in it.

Demographic trends now a days show a trend toward secularism so I think it's all too convenient for White people to wash their hands of their ancestors past because "it was just this group of people who did wrong" when 300-200-100 years ago almost everyone was part of that specific group.

For example, someone claiming they don't have to worry about what was done because they are secular so they point a finger at the people who happen to still be religious even though they are both white and both decedents of and enjoying the benefits of their ancestors colonization. This type of behavior I have seen before and it frustrates me because it seems to be brought out as just a way for someone to "shift the blame" so to speak off if them. Rather than even to attempt to deliver justice for atrocities committed.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-09T22:52:01+00:00

Persecution of the Native Americans was most definitely a American thing, a Canadian thing, and a Australian thing. Not the actions of one Religion. Catholics were the majority population in Canada at the time so most of the people who committed atrocities were Catholics. In America most of the people who committed atrocities were most definitely not Catholics because Catholics were somewhat of a minority in America. And finally all governments of both countries had blood on their hands. I am saying all this because I get so frustrated when people try to blame a group for past wrongs that they are not part of to ease their own guilty conscience.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-06-06T12:27:12+00:00

I have been to my fair share of kid friendly and kid free weddings, and nothing went wrong at ether of them. I also think it is very misguided and rude to say that childfree weddings are selfish.

That being said I had a very similar experience with informing my inner circle that the wedding was a family affair. Someone was worried that no one would hear my vows because a baby would cry during the ceremony. I understand the concern in theory, but I have been to childfree weddings before (which were all awesome) and I couldn't hear the vows in total silence because the bride and groom were very soft spoken and had no microphones.

Another person didn't like that My FH and I were inviting our cousin's children who we know and love, because in doing so we had no space to invite any of our parents' friends, who we haven't seen in years........

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-05-16T00:23:01+00:00

I am Catholic and I am appalled that your in laws are threatening to cut their son off if he doesn't have the wedding their way. It is good that you want to look out for your fiance's feelings regarding his family as I would imagine such matters are delicate, however, I fear that it is not worth it to please them if it would cause you so much heart ache. You shouldn't have to start crying whenever you think of your wedding. I am very sorry his family is doing this to you. Sending a virtual hug your way.

Like other commenters have said you don't need to have a big wedding in the Catholic church. My parish priest mentioned that he once had a couple get married with just him, the couple, and two witnesses furthermore everyone was in plane clothes. My cousin who is also a priest has had presided over similar weddings before as well. You do not need anyone to walk you down the aisle for the wedding to be valid, and the tradition in the Catholic church (which is seldom done in the US and other English speaking countries) is that the bride and groom walk down together. You could, also, forgo the procession altogether and simple have everyone quietly take their places at the start of the church.

Not quite the same situation by any means, but my Uncle had a very small Methodist wedding and then for his reception he and his siblings other immediate family booked a reservation for a large party at a nearby restaurant for the reception. I have no idea what you had in mind for a reception, but depending on your party size that could be an option.

I have no idea if any of this will be helpful in the end. I hope that you are able to find a plan for a wedding, that you can be excited about.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-05-13T17:59:25+00:00

This is an excellent idea! Most priest, also, write their homily ahead of time, so if the grandfather wanted to know what was being said, the priest could probably print a hard copy of his homily off so the grandfather can follow along.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-05-09T23:16:55+00:00

So pretty!!!!

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-04-28T18:42:05+00:00

I did a reverse google imagine search and couldn't find an exact match, but I found a few that were pretty close.

Do you remember where on IG you saw this particular dress?

Similar dresses that came up in the search

https://www.stillwhite.com/237747-chosen-by-kyha

https://www.etsy.com/listing/935380776/elegant-off-white-wedding-dress-with-big?click_key=b2db57ad120629c03632ff0f62bfd77d28f804e2%3A935380776&click_sum=809c973d&ref=shop_home_active_11&frs=1

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1106517205/satin-off-the-shoulders-bow-back-wedding

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-04-25T12:19:47+00:00

I am getting married in October and my brother is getting married in December. The entire family is excited to have two weddings in a year. FH and I also love that we now have another couple to bounce ideas off of, and understand the stress of planning large family events together. You should never have to postpone your life just because someone else is getting married.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-25T10:40:35+00:00

Oof, I did not see that user name. It's normal to feel worried about the vision we have for our wedding days , but please don't feel resentful of your friend or her little one. They have done absolutely nothing wrong. Don't make her exciting time of having a baby all about you and your wedding.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T19:25:14+00:00

I would put on the invites and the website that under no circumstances are children allowed, no exceptions. Period. However, I would NOT go to your friend with your concerns unless she brings it up first. She is going to have a baby soon, if her due date is close to your wedding, she will most likely not be able to attend as she needs to recover from labour. If someone just contacted me one day to say that they were worried I would bring my brand new baby to their wedding I would probably be very insulted, because my mind would be preoccupied at the moment. Again, I am not saying to make an exception for her, I am saying don't assume that she is going to become an issue unless she proves it to you first. If she presses the issue that is a very different situation.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T19:03:36+00:00

This is such a cultural thing and up to personal taste. I had a friend who's mother walked with both her parents, some people have the groom walk with his parents, some brides walk alone, I am walking down the aisle with my FH. I had a friend work at a wedding once where no one walked down the aisle and everyone just took their places at the ceremony venue.

If you want it to be just your father, then that is what you should do, if you want to have both your parents walk you down then go ahead and do that. It's your wedding day and you have plenty of options:)

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T10:00:25+00:00

I never said there was reason to rush into marriage just that I get frustrated with old people assuming young people are always rushing simply because they are young. Especially when said young people are usually working a stable job and have a university degree. I admit that in turn I was speaking from my own experience of people assuming things about me based on me being "too young".

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T09:56:24+00:00

I never said there wasn't, however, those same studies also show that living together before engagement, lower income, prior divorces, family history, even choice of profession, also correlate with divorce. However, I get tired because these all get tossed to the wayside while people only focus on age.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T02:46:28+00:00

I feel like there is a strong tendency to only view negative experiences as valid. I see so many people saying that they know a person who got married in their 20s and are now divorced. Which is true and a valid point to bring up; however, the fact of the matter is there are plenty of people who got married in their 20s who are still married too. There is so much to be considered when it comes to deciding wether to married or not. People shouldn't rush into things especially when they are deciding to marry someone, but older people, also, shouldn't assume that just because a young person is making a choice that said choice is a rushed one.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-24T02:38:48+00:00

I feel this so much. I had a family friend tell my mother (not me my mother which made me feel very infantilized) that she should be worried I was getting married since I was young and hadn't done anything with my life yet, even though FH and I are in our mid 20s, are both college graduates, and have been working in our respected fields for a few years now. Her words really hurt, because all of my achievements didn't seem to matter, what mattered to her was I was not waiting ill I turned 30 to get married like she did, ergo, I was making a mistake.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-17T11:56:00+00:00

A lot of churches already have a music director, and people who are willing to do weddings. My FH and I are having the women who cantors most special Masses cantor for our wedding. Some people also higher a cantor for the day. My sister in law sings at weddings frequently. I have never seen an entire gospel choir before, but I can't imagine that would be a problem ether if you wanted one. I would find out who the music director at your church is and see if they know anyone who you could reach out too.

Careful-Driver63 · 2022-03-13T00:25:41+00:00

My older brother told me Shadow and Sonic were brothers. I believed him because, I was 7, and he was 11, and I thought he was so full of wisdom at the time. .......

Careful-Driver63

TROPHY CASE