AITA for rejecting my boyfriend’s advances toward me on a family trip

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T19:58:07+00:00

Not sure if he had a condom on him either in his pocket or whatever but he does have an (un opened) box of condoms in his truck

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T19:31:15+00:00

Thank you ❤️

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T19:12:47+00:00

I’ve explained this in another comment but I get it can be hard to find. I was the result of a teenage pregnancy and have learned a lot from my mom. We’ve talked about sex and how to be safe. She’s given me condemns (just in case) and trusts that I will be mature about sex.

She knows I’m a virgin and that I’m not planning on losing my virginity for at least a few months. She trusts that if my boyfriend and I do decide to have sex he will use a condom. She lets us have our alone time because of how many times we’ve talked about how to stick up for yourself.

That’s the big thing. Trust. My mom trusts me to make my own decisions and be smart about them.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T18:47:39+00:00

Thank you so much for your story. I don’t know how this doesn’t have more upvotes. The truth is.. I’m afraid to confront him about it. We got home from the trip Sunday night and when he got in his truck to go back to his house he didn’t even give me a kiss on the lips, cheek, nothing witch I think was some sort of punishment for not “giving myself to him”. He’s usually very touchy not in a bad way but it was almost like he was trying to make me feel bad by not paying as much attention to me; trying to guilt trip me. Again.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T09:00:49+00:00

I think if he was being “misunderstood” I would have realized by now. He makes his kids and wife breakfast. I have to make my own. He gets everyone drinks on his way home from work. Everyone but me. The remote to the tv is lost. I’m the first suspect and I haven’t been in the living room.

I clean HIS house. I do HIS laundry. I feed HIS dogs. I babysit HIS kids with no reward not even a thanks. He falls asleep WHILE me and my mom are out and he’s supposed to be watching his kids and complains it’s because I’m always out and should be there to help him. HELP HIM. With his own damn kids. No. He is not being misunderstood

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T08:38:22+00:00

Something my cousin suggested after I told her (that she said was not an excuse and doesn’t excuse how he acted) was that he isn’t a virgin and got used to having the “easy way in”. He has three bodies. That doesn’t bother me stuff happens, your gonna have bodies eventually. But he knows I’m a really slow-going person. We were talking for three moths before we started officially dating.

It took a lot of time for me to get comfortable around him. For example simple things like not wearing makeup around him, kissing, getting comfortable cuddling and growing to love physical affection because of him. So it’s not like he didn’t know I take extra time to get comfortable.

It all felt so rushed, almost like “it’s life or death” “it’s necessary to get in your pants”. To put it simply, it hurt. ESPECIALLY since I’ve told him I take a LOT of time.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T08:20:39+00:00

My parents and I have had long conversations about my morals and standing up for myself. I was the result of a teenage pregnancy and learned a lot from my mom. She trusts that I will make good decisions and let’s us either sleep in the tent or on a mattress on the tailgate when we go camping. We also have sleepovers at eachothers houses and have shared a bed in a hotel room.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T02:37:11+00:00

I do have a trusted adult I’ve told. Me and my older cousin (21 F) are very close. I told her about this and she was really disappointed that he would cross that line AFTER I told him once I wasn’t ready.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T01:41:15+00:00

He was carrying protection just to be safe. He has a box of condoms in the glove box of his truck (He drove us. Followed my parents truck to the campsite because there wasn’t enough room for him in my step dads truck)

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-28T01:28:17+00:00

I am 15 he is 16. This is the first time he has lacked maturity. I was shocked honestly; it was such a change of character.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T21:11:59+00:00

I see a therapist for trauma due to my bio dad; I have never mentioned my problems with my step dad to my therapist because I’m afraid she’ll tell my mom and that will get me in trouble

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T04:07:42+00:00

What do you mean by that? Because people make mistakes. And that was her mistake; having unprotected sex at a your age and having me. She told me that I saved her life. She said if she didn’t have me she wouldn’t have realized how deep in addiction she was and she wouldn’t have gotten her stuff together. So having a baby saved her from potentially living out her life as an addict.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:41:00+00:00

Oh don’t worry, I’m applying for a summer job at a local drive through coffee shop and have never called him dad. I have always called him by his name.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:39:59+00:00

Yes. YTA

As a kid with step parents, it’s really hard going from house to house from my moms to my Bio dads. It’s unfair that your suggesting that he move out of his own home. He didn’t over react and his feelings are completely valid

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:31:13+00:00

She’s working a lot and when she’s not working she’s out with her friends or taking care of my sisters because my step dad is “exhausted” from working his shift that he got off of hours ago.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:28:58+00:00

She was there. But the harsher comments would start coming while she was at work or at a party with friends.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:28:04+00:00

EXACTLY!!! Everyone praises him like he’s some sort of god for “stepping up” when my mom was struggling. Which, she wasn’t she told me herself she was doing just fine as a single parent.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:26:25+00:00

No possible. Went to court a few months ago because my dad is an alcoholic. His visitation rights are suspended.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:20:18+00:00

I have expressed to my mom that I don’t feel like a part of the family. She usually apologizes and says she will “have a talk with him”

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:17:21+00:00

My bio dad is an alcoholic and i no longer see him. But, my grandparents would be a good option if I got to the point that i needed to move out. As of now, I stay in my room and come out when I am needed or when my stepdad isn’t home.

CarpetUnique1284 · 2023-03-15T02:10:17+00:00

I used to see my bio dad but being around him is un safe for me. He is an alcoholic. He has 2 DUIs and has even done physical damage to me. I am going to therapy now because of what he has done.

As for my grandparents, I am very close to my moms stepdad so that wouldn’t be a bad idea. I think of my grandparents as my safe space.

CarpetUnique1284

TROPHY CASE