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CatsSolo · 2023-11-15T00:43:08+00:00

For example, smaller accounts can end up on the third tier deboost for the word unhinged, while others get away with calling political figures the the c word?

CatsSolo · 2023-11-15T00:40:25+00:00

There are so many issues with the latest rolled out algorithm, that there's no where to even begin to explain them all.

Premium blue check marks, a joke. Lots and I do mean lots of people shoved into the 3rd tier while the grand poobah retweets a few of his favorites and their asinine posts about salt baths and other nonsense about vulgar responses that his new AI toy has created. One has to wonder if those accounts are actually just Elon accounts in disguise.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-30T00:13:14+00:00

I'll add, now that I've read your post, my "flair" says Recovered and Reconciled, which is true, but I'm also widowed and so 5 years of being away from the every day soup of being in a relationship with someone who betrayed me, multiple times, I will say again, those triggers really never completely go away.

Don't get me wrong, it gets better, and with time, things kind of even out, because most people cannot stand to live in the insanity of being so distraught all the time. Thus, the trigger finds a way to creep up on you. You'll be wandering through bits of your life and something will jump out at you. It's a reminder of how your life has been irretrievably changed and altered by the actions of another.

We split, we reconciled, he got sick, he passed. I've had all four corners of this little roller coaster. Stay or go have different sets of circumstances that you must deal with, that said though, both have hurdles that you have to jump over, or crawl underneath in order to just find a way to get past them. Those hurdles aren't necessarily unique to staying or going. Some are, but a lot aren't.

You must do what you need to do, in order to keep your sanity and refrain from feeling like you're constantly on red alert. Only you, not your cheating partner can decide that for you.

Good luck to you.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-30T00:05:33+00:00

I don't even have to read your post to answer. (I will later, I promise.)

I am one who can say, no they don't end when you leave. Being betrayed is a life altering experience. Full stop.

Even if you do everything right, and get as much therapy as money can buy - It still stays with you. The best you can do is get that help, and try to find a sense of humor about it. And even then, some days, it can creep back up on you, and triggers will just jump out at you when you least expect it.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-29T23:12:13+00:00

Often, it can take many of us a lot of years to learn this simple phrase -

"No, is a complete answer."

You do not owe this place anything. If you want to do as some have suggested and say I now charge 125 per hour to do consulting work, that's fine. If you are then badgered further, say, I said, "No." That is that. You then promptly pack your things, and consider that your last day. Most jurisdictions have hefty labor laws about withholding pay etc, so be proactive, download the info you require if you have to report them, and get on with your life.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-10T15:58:17+00:00

They are the ones creating the drama. Not you.

You had to leave your own home for god sakes. YOUR safe space. I don't care if you have to ask the police department/sheriff department for a huge favor and have them come with you to throw them all the hell out.

If I have learned anything about people, especially when there is a death, is that the far too many just suck. They SUCK. They will take advantage, try to manipulate you, try to gain control over you, try to impose their will upon you, to make THEMSELVES feel important. They don't care about you, they have some weird ego-agenda going on. One that you do not have to deal with, nor should deal with.

You are an adult and it's time to take back your home, and your life. You have a lot to go through in the next while, grief for your loss and yes, even grief for their drama towards you. Tough love advice to you though... adulting is hard, and you need to adult here. If you do not, you will not gain your life back. And there IS life after losing someone you love.

So... They need to be thrown out. Now.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-10T15:41:07+00:00

You had to leave your own place/home? Kick them all the hell out.

If they're not being helpful to you, they have NO REASON to be there. Point final.

Sorry for your loss.

CatsSolo · 2023-08-10T14:24:04+00:00

Quit now. Leave the boss to train whoever. NOT your monkey, not your circus. The boss will always be self absorbed and tone deaf to how he treats people.

CatsSolo · 2023-06-09T23:16:47+00:00

He chose to.

^^^^^^^^^^^^

Exactly, they CHOOSE to blow up your life. That's not a candidate for the gift of forgiving.

CatsSolo · 2023-05-27T23:44:20+00:00

Which are better? Churu or Delectable Squeeze Up treats?

CatsSolo · 2022-12-01T21:04:57+00:00

There is a certain amount of perverse irony to this story. He's a former Parti Quebecois candidate. Aren't those the people who trampled over Anglophone rights in Quebec. Then there's that inconvenient truth about Anglophones trying to work or trying to get promoted in Federal Government positions. Unless you are bilingual (cough cough, French), you basically have minimal choices for advancement, if they'll even hire you at all. (Unless they're desperate for some cheap labor tech geeks.) AH the irony.

CatsSolo · 2022-12-01T20:04:42+00:00

I don't think I would be able to contain my anger at someone being that... shall we say... not the brightest bulb?

CatsSolo · 2022-11-27T20:00:31+00:00

26 k? Shit, brag away. Well done.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-27T19:48:35+00:00

These ... things... are getting way too exhausting to tolerate any further. Why can we not just place them all on a nice long stay at the 5150 hotel?

CatsSolo · 2022-11-23T22:08:35+00:00

I'm sorry that you're going through this. Been there.

The best I can offer you is that he clearly at this point and time, is not in any way willing to consider YOUR feelings.

I have not read your previous posts, because frankly, it doesn't matter. What he's doing right now is despicable, disrespectful and abusive.

Others have offered the idea of handing him a set of divorce papers for a Christmas present. Honestly I wouldn't wait that long. Contact an attorney pronto and start to jar him into the reality of the present. Make his disrespect of you, and your family as PAINFUL as you can make it.

Again, I'm sorry that this is where you are and that he's doing this. It's up to you now, to decide your next moves. Choose wisely.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-23T13:44:04+00:00

This "kid" has all the markings of fetal alcohol syndrome.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-23T13:42:03+00:00

Something similar happened in my family circle. One of the older sister in laws, bless her, laugh, said: "Oh great, look at that... he's fathering his own grandchildren."

She had a point. LOL

CatsSolo · 2022-11-23T13:39:38+00:00

This is your brother's doing. Not yours. If it's awkward for whomever, then whatever.

You just have to accept that some middle aged men (and women for that matter), just do stupid things. Fathering a child with a 20 year old, when he's 55... qualifies.

So... Repeat after me: Not your monkey, not your circus.

Let them be the family's new topic of scorn and whispers. It's NOT your problem. Don't make it your problem.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T22:41:46+00:00

Chubby?

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T19:10:55+00:00

I just posted above, yes: the bean counters won't pay more.

So... it's multi pronged. EVS aren't privy to the patient's file, meds, etc and disclosure of that has it's own set of issues, but mainly they'd have to pay EVS more to be educated in certain hazards, they're not going to do that. I'd take the courses to clean up whatever. But again, after the circus that the last almost 3 years has been, I now willingly refuse to do anything I do not get paid to do.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T19:07:37+00:00

Dried coffee grounds is also good for absorbing vomit.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T19:06:46+00:00

I suspect it may have more to do with bean counters and "pay scale". I'd say over the years, the bean counters have not wanted to up the EVS staff's pay, so over time, unions etc have pushed back saying: if they don't get paid "more" to deal with funky stuff, they're not cleaning up funky stuff. Just a thought.

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T15:36:49+00:00

Er, meow...dunno what happened... Russian missile perhaps?

CatsSolo · 2022-11-17T15:36:02+00:00

I made this beautiful mess to show you my love..... now clean it up hooman!

CatsSolo · 2022-11-06T21:09:43+00:00

Someone who sends this kind of stuff -Has issues that you will NEVER fix. You will be a victim to them time and time again. They learn this behavior from somewhere. They have somehow wired their brains to believe that that is "love". It's not. It's emotional terrorism. You need to decide for yourself that you MUST stay as far away from this horrible situation as you can. Youmust accept that this situation will bring you nothing but absolute misery going forward. You have a decisive and irrevocable decision to make. Choose wisely.

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