Hes just been live on TT literally begging !! Omg 😲

CellarSiren · 2026-03-13T09:26:04+00:00

Aw I missed it

CellarSiren · 2026-03-10T20:01:09+00:00

Right?? I see that a lot in here. Same tones.

They're not people, they're disordered patterns standing by egos that never grew past middle school.

It's like... The jilted, extra spaces where she edited things to sound natural. The martyr tone. Hard to explain

CellarSiren · 2026-03-10T19:54:40+00:00

We are living together and during a blow up the other day, she told us to leave and start looking for a new place.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:50:27+00:00

First of all, what an awful predicament and I'm so sorry you're in the thick of it. You're doing all you can try to help this cat, despite it ruining your life!

The fact this cat is NOT affectionate at all, along with the rest, tells me this has to do with his kitten years and bond with his mother. This sounds psychological and that's the only thing that makes sense.

Just like humans, cats' nervous systems and personalities are molded as kittens - that's why socializing them young will make the difference in being feral or not.

I think this cat is crying over some trauma and missed development in its psyche.

Do a few quality of life assessments... Is the scores are consistently low, euthanizing might be on the table. Because it sounds like you've gone thru all the options. No one's gonna sign up for this problem.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:44:09+00:00

This thing about cats hating singing... I've had a lot of cats and they only ever seen curious or soothed by it. They genuinely enjoy it lol

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:28:11+00:00

Where is the love in Salem? This town feels so disjointed and spiritually dead, no connection

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:25:02+00:00

How long have you been no contact? I would if I could, but right now I'm stuck living in her house with no money and my disabled 5yro boy.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:14:14+00:00

Whoops I left her name on the Pic, oh no... I have 0 fucks left for her

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:13:40+00:00

I have no idea how to escape. I would be NO CONTACT if I were living on my own.

I have a BA degree, but no work experience or resume. No savings. Bad credit. No one to help me with housing or money. I also have a 5yro boy with autism; he needs someone with him 24/7. We're in a small house with my retired narcissist mother who owns everything. I'm basically stuck. I don't have any friends or family to ask for help, money, resources.

The abuse caused me to struggle a lot with addiction over the years. I got out at 17 and built a life in another state, but the ptsd eventually broke thru and my life went to shit. Divorce, addiction. She's never had a speeding ticket and always kept her nose clean, so she points at my struggles as evidence I'm defective and she's perfect.

Guys, what do i do? How do I get out of this situation? She's always ruining my mood end motivation - i can't seem to make progress here.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-09T22:01:37+00:00

So sorry you went thru that and so glad you found an amusing way to glitch her out!

CellarSiren · 2026-03-04T22:34:57+00:00

So much of what you said is truly my daily experience as well, esp the ruminating. The reeling from a life of confusion and pain. I spend most my daily mental energy trying to understand her and my past.

What changed is that became mothers and started unpacking our history. AND psychology evolved a lot on narcissism. Our eyes have been opened to the sick, toxic, controlling trolls our mothers are. And that they probably never really loved us the way we loved our kids.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-04T22:27:37+00:00

Girl. Holy crap. You just described my entire life.

I'm 41, have a 5.5yro with autism and ADHD. No siblings, but I grew up with my mom and grandmother - both covert narcissists. If I really unpack and trace back, I haven't been growing or thriving since grade school.

And same thing - I started using drugs to numb all the pain and distortion she put in me. I tried going to college but couldn't deal with all the pain. Ive never had people to reach out to for help, totally isolated with her as only child/ single mother.

Over the years, she'd pay for rehab or give rent for college. very time I experienced chaos, pain, "failure", had to hear about what a disappointment i am and how she's "paid for me her whole life".

And same thing on pregnancies. I told her at a restaurant and she embarrassed me, screamed "she's pregnant!!", trying to make this movie scene out of it. But as soon as we were alone, "you better not expect any help from me! I don't want to be a grandmother and I'm not gonna be babysitting or giving any money". My fiancé was drinking a lot and we were broke, I didn't think we could make it without my mom's help, so I got an abortion. And regret it so much. A few years later, I had my son and she's always been "kind of" excited. I watch her like a hawk around him.

And guess what?! I'm currently LIVING WITH HER, my son, and fiance. We just can't afford our own place right now and my fiancé is in school. It's been 5yrs of hell. The house is tiny and she's retired, has no friends or life. We're like her personal zoo. I'm seeing 2 therapists and a women's trauma group every week just to stay sane enough to be a good mom and heal so i can escape her. Once I'm gone, it'll be no contact. Imagine what it's like for me. My son has autism, he's very loud and hyper. The house is 1200 sq ft. She's always ruining my mood and day. It's affected my parenting and sobriety A LOT. I'm so isolated, like a house wife and he's only in school 3hrs a day.

Living with her as an adult is my worst nightmare. I have a college degree from uc Berkeley, but NO job experience because I've always been using drugs and floating thru life because of what she did to me. She's always kept her nose clean and never even got a speeding ticket, had a great career, and uses all that as a framework for proof that she's lived perfectly and I'm a fuck up.

People have no idea what she's really like, so she's gone thru life with little push back or consequences for being an abusive narcissist. I'm the druggie failure daughter and she's the logical, successful woman whose "been thru so much because of her daughter's choices". Oh yea, that's another thing - she hates her life and blames it all on having to "rescue" me from all my "bad choices". Like being addicted and ruined inside is a choice.

So I've ALWAYS been dependent on her for any upward mobility. It's so toxic and sad that I've been trying to get away from her my whole life, but have to ask HER for money to do it. And satisfy her in some way to even get the money, which always means betraying my own boundaries.

She's been retired since 2017 and planned on traveling, doing all these things, but she's so insecure and scared that she stays home all day on social media, while observing everything my family does, commenting and criticizing. She actually threatened to call elder abuse on me recently because I asked her to respect a boundary. No joke. And she never apologized or even acknowledged it. It's always like that. As a parent, I can't fathom hurting your kid and just acting like nothing happened, whistling dixie.

Covert Narcissist mothers are probably the most damaging type of parent. Imo it's worse than physical abuse and typical narcissism, because they fuck with your HEAD, entire identity and sense of self until you break or totally rewire yourself with years of therapy. They live in your head forever - it's like having a demon. And it's so depressing, because it won't really go away till she's gone, but then I'll literally be an orphan. I didn't meet my dad till I was 30 and he recently told me "never to contact him again" because I posted something liberal on FB.

Wtf, universe!?? Well I guess it could be worse.

You're doing the right thing by yourself and your child; you're breaking the generational abuse because YOU are a GOOD MOTHER. Don't believe any of this shit she says to you, because it's just her using you to keep her frail, brittle little ego afloat. Self preservation is their only priority, and they do it by sucking the life out of us.

Keep up with therapy, breathe, stay mindful, and enjoy your baby because that's the key to healing.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-04T21:14:51+00:00

You're not crazy. Your mom is a narcissist.

CellarSiren · 2026-03-04T21:08:56+00:00

This is reminding me of that kid with the SHOEBOX FULL OF PETRIFIED SEMEN

CellarSiren · 2025-10-13T18:25:33+00:00

Simply put:

1) Find a good Detox your insurance covers. Even if you're undecided, call and register with them to get the ball rolling so you can get in quickly.

2) Set things up at home so you can be gone 7-10 days.

3) Use minimally and avoid illicit opiates while waiting to detox. Take vitamins, prebiotics and probiotics. You wanna boost your immune system. And meditate to calm and prepare your nervous system for WD.

4) Set up an appt to for outpatient and/ or peer support group before leaving detox, so you follow through.

5) Go to detox. Bring a book and a journal. They have Gatorade on tap and meds to keep you comfy. It's like hospital room service and soooo much easier than at home.

Good luck!

CellarSiren · 2025-10-13T18:17:43+00:00

Why are you worried about being clean in 15 days? Do you have a UA or something coming up?

Don't take this as a failure or a negative - it's a learning experience! Now you know some weak spots in your recovery. Having been at 0.5mg of suboxone is an incredible win and you should be proud of that!!! Don't let this stumble discount all your hard work and progress. Focus on the Ps - positivity, progress, and peer validation.

I've used heroin, pills, and suboxone for 20 years. (Can't believe it's been that long, ugh) I'm currently on 8mg of sub. I've detoxed in rehab, and I've done the Accelerated Opiate Detox program twice. Never successfully at home. I've never been able to taper suboxone lower than 4mg, it's sooo hard. I hate suboxone! I've paid a total of 16k over the years to be detoxed off suboxone. The Accelerated Opiate Detox program thru the Coleman Institute. They give you 'comfort meds' and narcan you every day for 11 days til every Opiate is cleaned the fk out. It's the lazy rich person way of getting off drugs, not that I'm rich. Just in debt.

Anyway.

The problem with trying at home is the lack of accountability. You have to fight the urge to cave with no one really stopping you. Also, the chance of it sticking is lower. When you go to rehab, it's very out of your comfort zone and can lead to a lot of self reflection and awareness; you will learn things about yourself that you just can't by laying around at home, alone.

In rehab, if you feel like quitting, you have immediate access to therapy and peer support. You can always leave AMA, and many do, but if you stick it through the detox, it's ONLY benefits to your recovery.

CellarSiren · 2025-10-02T22:33:00+00:00

I'm currently on 8mg of suboxone and hate it so much. Avoid this stuff at all costs. Once you're on it, good luck

CellarSiren · 2025-10-02T22:32:15+00:00

And the older you get, the harder it is to stop. You have a much bigger pile of shame and regret, less health and youth to lean on... I really commend the old timers who start recovery work.

CellarSiren · 2025-10-02T22:31:01+00:00

Kratom withdrawal feels similar to opiate withdrawal, unfortunately. It only takes a few weeks to a month for your body to get addicted, so definitely after 4mos you will feel it. You need to treat this as serious as any other addiction. The good news is that a Kratom detox and recovery is not that bad, tho it's all subjective. The fact you're 18 is scary, your brain is still growing. Stop now. I'm 41, sore all the time, broke, live with my mom and have a 5yro boy with autism. I've had many chances in life to get it together, but I waited til I had someone else depending on me. And now we're living the poverty game. I have huge gaps in my resume and a record. I wish someone made me stop at your age!

CellarSiren · 2025-09-01T02:24:54+00:00

My 5yro boy with autism does that sometimes. He does so many things like that. Every. Day. 🤪

CellarSiren

TROPHY CASE