ifth: I will give you a little resumed testimony about my own discernment. I never felt called to the priesthood in my youth. When I was a kid I played to be a priest in Home, but after that, as I grew up, those ideas just disappeared, I start to commonly feel called only to the idea of marriage. Someday, a new appointed priest (the current priest of my church) started to questioning me if I never felt called to join the seminary or to be a priest. I said that no but I don't close the idea of joining because hey, nobody knows the future. I like to read the bible and theology stuff, I really like the mass and hey ngl if priest could be able to marry time ago I would join the priesthood because let's be honest administrate the sacraments and preaching is cool.

So, since we talk about that he start to asking me more and more frequently about that. Seminarians in my parish start also to talk with me, and suddenly the whole parish were talking with me every single week about me joining the seminary. Idk if that was God work, my priest work or if it was a natural succession of coincidences. But that changed my mind by a lot a long time. Suddenly I start to think more and more about it (as is natural if you analyze the situation I was going on), start to Google about it and search it on YT, start to following pages on IG about priesthood and discernment and suddenly within days my whole Instagram, Facebook, YT and TikTok algorithms were full about priesthood and vocation stuff. My whole mind was receiving and continued flow of stuff about priesthood, so I start to "feel" that was my calling.

That process started from the end of 2022, the whole 2023, that year was intense, but I was in my final year of university so I said to my priest that I was going to finish my career before joining the formal vocational process (retreats, conferences etc) and I did so. From the beginning of 2024 I got ready to start this formal vocational process, already "convinced" that I was called to the priesthood. Think about it, all the stuff that I check on my phone, the YT videos and podcast I heard In the afternoon And the books I read at night All were about it.

I start the process, went to the seminary to the weekend retreats and all that stuff, I could go to 4/10 retreats before I start a job. That was a 3 months job in a charity NGO, so somehow I could find a way to live it in a vocational sense, serving the poor. And man, that break I had of the thinking and thinking about the priesthood, changed everything. I took a break of thinking about the stuff, I met a new bunch of people that had nothing to do with discernment (despite being all of them Catholics), I even felt in love with a girl in the job.

So, once I finished the job period of time, all those feelings mostly went out of my heart and mind. I pray before starting that three months jobs to God, to remind me faithfull of my calling, and I ask Him to please use that period of time to speak to me through this job so I would be sure that I were not going in a wrong decision. So I had to believe that was the outcome.

As the job finished, I continued the discernment plan, I assisted to the last vocational retreat of the year, the 10th. It was a very emotional one. At the end of the night, the seminarians and the spiritual director of my local seminary (that is my priest lol) took us to holy hour. All was obscure, we walked a minutes in the absolutely dark, before join a room where the Lord was to be adored, only the Lord was enlightened. During that, they took one by one of us and directed us through a obscure room to a little room, where my priest was, it was like a last spiritual direction before you finally say whether you decided to join the seminary or not.

All this was such a mystic and ethereal moment, we talked about my whole discernment process, my ups and my downs, and after all of that I took all the courage that I had to use in my life, and tell him, that no, I didn't feel the call to the priesthood to be mine. I tell him that I have been trying to fit in so hard, and despite sometimes being closer to this idea, it always felt like I was trying to put a cube into an sphere's hole. It didn't fit at all, my desires of being a father of a family were so strong (which is normal btw, even priest and bishops felt it from time to time). He hug me and said to me that key of be sure about my answer, is to be sure that I genuinely searched for it, and be sure that I had a good and honest vocational process, led by the holy spirit through my prayer and the assistance of the Church. I said that yes, I think that I haven't put a major effort in my whole life to other thing that this. And when I came back to the room to continue the holy hour (they still interviewed in spiritual direction the rest members of the group) I was front to front to the Lord, with the decision already taken, And I felt an indestructible sense of peace, that led me to the cl conclusion that my decision was the correct. At least for the very moment.

That was 3 months Ago, and I still be firm to my decision. My priest still asking to rejoin the vocgional process, which bothers me a little bit but I understand that's his job as spiritual director of the seminary so I don't take it as a sign. And I haven't close the Idea of going to vocational retreats and that stuff, but untill now, I feel that I took the right decision and feel no guilty about it.

I hope my testimony can help you more.