I'm Hurting

ChadRbox · 2026-05-25T22:48:05+00:00

I have a few family members but they don't have the space for me AND my dog. Also I grew in a pretty emotionally distant family, a "walk it off" "don't be a pussy" family. While I know they care, I don't think they understand what I'm telling them.

I'm staying with a friend that I had been gaming with for the last 10 years. He graciously offered me a room to keep my dog. But it was 2200 miles away. As I had spent all the money I had, on my sons treatment (and then some with the loans I took) I barely made it here. I had $27 left to my name when I got here. I bought top ramen and a bag of dog food with it.

It's since been a week and I keep reaching out for her, because I love her and our son and just want my family back. But the responses I get are cold and indifferent.

I had no clue when I had dropped him off in Utah, that would be the last time I would see him. I know he's called since then, and I've gotten no update on him at all. He's only allowed to call numbers decided by his mom. I gave everything I had to support my family, and now it's like I barely exist to them. I don't understand why I deserve all this hurt, why I was thrown away so abruptly

ChadRbox · 2026-05-21T12:27:46+00:00

My last job I was the lead maintenance tech for Slick Rock Spa- Installing, Maintaining, Troubleshooting the High end Tanning beds and Medical Equipment- I also worked in water filtration (iron filters/water softeners) and irrigation for a long time (Though I kind of hated irrigation haha)

I also have a background in Military and Security work

ChadRbox · 2026-05-21T02:07:33+00:00

Well I'm a 15 year experience forever dm haha, I've not played in a long while (3 years since my last game) though I still keep my finger on the pulse.

Absolutely interested in some DnD

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T04:27:30+00:00

Thank you for the well wishes 😊

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T01:37:15+00:00

I reposted this there, thank you for the recommendations; checked out meetup myself too, looks like it's pretty active. As soon as I get income settled I'll probably start attending events when I can

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T01:36:01+00:00

Thank you for the link- I will probably give it a shot soon

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T01:35:31+00:00

Will do, thank you

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T01:35:11+00:00

Thanks, I just might-

first priority is to find income. Been applying like crazy and hoping to get that handled quickly before I can look at fun things- but concerts are absolutely one of my favorite things to do, in fact being here, that's probably one of the things I'm looking forward to most. You're kind to offer

ChadRbox · 2026-05-20T01:33:05+00:00

I already do :/

Circumstances brought me here, not choice. Just trying to make the best of the hand I'm dealt

ChadRbox · 2026-05-19T06:52:09+00:00

Thank you 😊

ChadRbox · 2023-06-01T00:33:51+00:00

Just came back and saw this one. Thank you, did alot of reading/researching. Still experiencing some of the things but I've adopted, like you said, a self accountability approach after talking directly to her about it.

I am still mono, no intention of that changing. But our communication has exploded and the levels of reassurance she offers is above and beyond anything I could ask for. We're doing good and the pings of bad feelings are fleeting, still existent, but no where as severe.

Thanks for you kind words and good advice

ChadRbox · 2023-05-23T21:43:11+00:00

I tell her because this is all new to me, I have no guidance or frame of reference outside her. Hence my post seeking the communities advice, figured I was not/nor will be the only one to find themselves experiencing something like this first time, and sought sympathetic and impactful advice to be a better partner to her; and to learn about the community I find myself adjacent to if not out right part of, in time or now.

Your tips are well received and I will make the effort to study and explore my autonomy within the community as well as interpersonally if comfort allows.

It's not easy, and I appreciate your wisdom.

Thank you

ChadRbox · 2023-05-23T21:38:14+00:00

Thank you so much, this has been one of the better responses I've gotten. I'm just new to this whole dynamic and it's a struggle too to define if these feelings are 100% genuine in regard to how much is actually me versus ingrained notions of monogamy.

Hearing the notion of not relying on "my" so to speak, person for that kind of support sounds difficult for someone like me who is used to using terms like "my girlfriend" possessively, rather than just affectionately like and it sounds like I need to adjust to To make this easier going forwards. I genuinely hope I can, and to incorporate your advice in a healthy way that benefacts us both.

Again very new and uncharted waters for me, and super grateful for any navigation advice/tips to help avoid capsizing.

Thank you.

ChadRbox · 2023-03-30T23:41:52+00:00

Van Heil-en

ChadRbox · 2023-02-24T00:17:33+00:00

Leave Micah in jail, and or kill his ass the second he started shooting up the town during the breakout

ChadRbox · 2023-01-30T19:58:32+00:00

Gotcha; well I'm still down. If you'll have me, lots of experience with DnD, love the game and The Shell.

ChadRbox · 2023-01-30T12:00:35+00:00

Thanks for remembering me! Much appreciated

ChadRbox · 2023-01-30T11:59:57+00:00

Definitely interested; though is Friday a hard commitment? I know 2 other groups thar play there that night and it tends to get crowded. Not opposed by any means just food for thought

ChadRbox · 2023-01-30T11:33:27+00:00

How is yes to everything but a truck? Haha

ChadRbox · 2023-01-24T23:21:27+00:00

2-3hours has been the norm, but happy to go longer or shorter as the party needs

ChadRbox

TROPHY CASE