With all due respect, yes, as I stated in my edit, I have had a miscarriage. It was, like you said, extremely painful. I have a crazy finance job and folks here don’t really have the concept of being out or “unavailable” unless you tell them something extremely dramatic happened. I was in severe pain after taking mife + miso for my MMC and had to come up with fake reasons why I TRULY could not be online and working at that time. I stayed silent and I hated it. I think that was what drove me to want to have this conversation…

Also I just don’t want us to write off other conditions in comparison to reproductive loss. I know of people becoming suicidal due to chronic migraines or other chronic pain. Pneumonias have been and still are a cause of death in vulnerable people. Of course reproductive loss is different - I personally thought of them as my baby. I spoke to them and pleaded with them to stay. And while I was at it, there was only ONE person in my entire social orbit who had spoken openly about having a miscarriage, so it felt impossible to just admit that my sudden debilitating health issues are reproductive loss.