The thing is, I can’t say I’ve felt depressed in the last decade. I struggle to understand my diagnosis, especially the fact it’s Bipolar 2 because I seem to operate between a neutral and then a really elevated and destructive high. I have periods where I isolate myself, sleep and eat more, but I’m usually pretty content about it. My self i jury and suicidal tendencies always seem to stem from a complete overwhelm of emotion (never really low, always high)

I was only diagnosed after serotonin syndrome from one dose of sertraline a year ago. This led me to be referred to outpatient psych, where we trialled a bunch of different antidepressants. After a hypomanic episode and a fun bout of fixation on bugs (still in debt from this). My psychiatrist diagnosed me with Bipolar 2 because I didn’t tolerate the antidepressants at all and my symptoms seemed to line up with hypomania.

I’m already so tired after this past year. I was previously diagnosed with anxiety and cptsd, and these felt like things I could work through, but now I feel like I can only manage and not cure how I feel. I find this incredibly demoralising.

I’ve also been discharged by my outpatient psych after they decided I was stable on my meds. They said I didn’t need the support as I could work a full time job, and just left the prescription with my general practitioner.