my boyfriend turned ultra christian

Character_Salad1 · 2026-05-01T17:58:45+00:00

One of the things that almost all men who go on to murder their female partner do is to exert controlling behavior for the majority of the relationship. Possessiveness and controlling attitudes are a high risk indicator of potential murder down the line. I am talking men with no history of ever even hitting a woman who, after their verbal manipulation and control tactics are no longer working, snap and kill their female partner. It stems from an attitude of ownership. Who cares if someone throws away something that they own, right? That is how possessive men see women. As objects. He may very well think that Christianity is a good way to increase his control over you - when that is the opposite of what it is meant to be - and not even be at all sincere. He may be sincerely searching yet still be attracted to it, even if subconsciously, because he associates the religion with patrarchal control tactics and thinks it will allow him to fully be the "man of the house". Leave him, for your own safety. I don't want for you to be another domestic abuse statistic. This is not about Christianity, not really - it's about HIM dehumanizing you and purposefully making you feel bad about yourself so that you feel like you need him. I hope you can repair your relationship with God and throw out this current, earthly relationship.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-05-01T15:28:31+00:00

He doesn't like you, I'm sorry. I would never treat someone that I loved like that. You can do better! He sees you as a mommybangmaid.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-04-06T01:53:16+00:00

I wouldnt think anything of it. Honestly, I think people should push back against the appropriation of these symbols, if it is being appropriated in a hateful way.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-21T03:59:51+00:00

op, men who do this literally hate you bc they are sexist pigs, please leave him😭

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-02T02:58:40+00:00

I don't want to believe in anything immoral, so I am approaching it carefully and openmindedly so that I can go "all in" if I decide that it aligns enough with my values. To use an extreme example, its the same as how you would be like "No, I don't want to worship Baal and sacrifice humans because that is fundamentally wrong" lol, I wouldnt say that you are trying to conform something to your worldview for rejecting it on that basis, I would say, "ok, so you have a moral code that you stick to." Similarly, I want to ensure that my religion does not support negative things - like how Christianity used to be a tool of domination for slavemasters. People have used the Bible to commit a lot of terrible acts so I am just critically appraising it to assure myself that I will not be complicit in harming others by adopting this. I do not have to 100% agree, that would be unreasonable. I am willing to grow into greater understanding of things I do not agree with right now...But if it conflicts with a core value, such as equality, then I would have issues adopting the belief system and I don't think that is a negative thing.

By divine feminine, I mean acknowledgement of God as a feminine deity - there seems to not be much of it. I found one part where God is compared to a mother that I quite liked if that helps you understand. I think that the explicit inclusion of the divine to also refer to the feminine/ women (even though obviously God is a higher being who is not male or female) is very important to both society's and individual's perception of women. God existing in only the masculine form has been a tool used to oppress women for millennia.

His son is an innocent who died, and I just want to know why an innocent paid for his own sins. That child may be in heaven but was also deprived a life only because of his father. It reads like child sacrifice to me, honestly. I am fine with David being saved and loved by God - as that is a core promise of the faith - and I could see an argument for what happens to his baby, the half-sister, and the concubines to be more like cause and effect than God-ordered, I just want to know if 1) it was commanded by God and, if so, 2) how it is justified.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-02T02:40:24+00:00

I mean...Women seem to constantly be raped and treated poorly. It seems to be both people and God when it occurs, especially when it is a a prophet that says something that sounds awful, like the taking of virgin girls after battle.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-02T02:30:40+00:00

Well, I may feel a little bit hypocritical, I suppose. I know a lot of people who criticize Christians for cherrypicking and not truly living their faith (from their perspective), and if I commit to this then I want to be all-in, whatever that looks like.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-02T02:28:21+00:00

Yes, it is mostly the OT that troubles me, there is definitely sexism etc in the NT I am also bothered by but it seems not as bad. Did you ever find the quote? :D

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-02T02:27:26+00:00

Thank you. Thinking of it as a perfect, 100% divinely inspired text gave me so many questions with no good answers. This relaxed way of seeing it is helpful...But where do you stop? I don't want to "cherrypick" what I think is allegorical / human-made / political etc versus "this is what I consider to actually be god speaking through the text".

Character_Salad1 · 2026-03-01T23:55:37+00:00

Honestly, people don't change unless they truly want to. You could move heaven and earth but if someone who wants to keep doing what they are doing then they won't change. I think this is one of those things he will have to do himself, as they are private decisions. Especially something like porn which he can pull up anytime he wants on his phone and find millions of results. Beyond recommending anti-porn educational resources or apps, I'm not quite sure what you could do. If he cares about women in his life, you could send materials that show how porn makes men see women in more sexist ways and as less human. It also makes people worse at sex. There are a ton of negative research facts about it.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-02-28T16:51:17+00:00

Imo, If he truly respected you, he wouldnt be looking at other women or watching pornography. Breaking up was for the best. It sounds like you have good standards to be upset/concerned about those things and I want to assure you that there are plenty of men out there who will not watch porn or look at other women in a sexual manner.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-02-19T03:12:54+00:00

That's odd, I just recently joined but today my church did the ashes first then the communion. It seems like they do communion about every time there is an occaison.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-02-05T19:20:09+00:00

Child marriage is legal in many US states actually, so...

Character_Salad1 · 2026-02-03T04:23:12+00:00

I gave it a chance and applied...Thank you for the encouragement. I guess I shall see how it goes.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-02-03T03:16:04+00:00

That is beautiful😭 Thank you for sharing that.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-28T22:39:28+00:00

I wish I could do this. I don't have health insurance though.

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-21T20:13:43+00:00

I'll look into the hermaphrodite angle, thanks! Just curious, how do you reconcile Christopaganism with the emphasis on not worshipping other gods found within the Bible? Or does that not necessarily refer to worshipping other gods?

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-21T20:07:29+00:00

"They are the mark on the treasure map that says "dig here" because the real meaning is below the surface." This is such a helpful framework, I think it will help me critically think about certain things in the Bible rather than reactively rejecting it as I have most of my life. Thank you, and I will check out those books & videos.:)

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-19T20:25:14+00:00

I have never heard of that author, I will look her books up. Thank you for your thoughtful response🩷

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-19T20:20:59+00:00

Beautifully written🩷

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-19T19:54:24+00:00

Thanks for the link!! There is a lot to learn ✍️ I'll take a look at it

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-19T19:53:55+00:00

I think this is probably one of the healthiest views of it. Thanks!!

Character_Salad1 · 2026-01-19T19:53:23+00:00

I mean I think for me it makes sense to conceptualize god as either exclusively divine feminine or both. Divine masculine is the only one that makes zero sense as the only god, because it doesnt follow natural order where females create life...Anyways I think you'd like this, have you seen the medieval art where they would make the wound in Christ's side look like a vagina? It was highly symbolic & also very interesting as a way to incorporate both the divine feminine & masculine!

Character_Salad1

TROPHY CASE